Women in their 30’s stop liking “bad boys”?

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GiantHockeyFan
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01 Nov 2019, 6:15 am

Marknis wrote:
I interacted with a nerdy/geeky woman in Austin who was probably in her mid 30’s and while she did tell me her Instagram (something I don’t use) page, she didn’t give me her cellphone number. No, I didn’t ask but you think she would’ve.

Most likely she is just looking for "followers" and nothing more. I wasted a lot of time with women like this.



Marknis
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01 Nov 2019, 12:50 pm

GiantHockeyFan wrote:
Marknis wrote:
I interacted with a nerdy/geeky woman in Austin who was probably in her mid 30’s and while she did tell me her Instagram (something I don’t use) page, she didn’t give me her cellphone number. No, I didn’t ask but you think she would’ve.

Most likely she is just looking for "followers" and nothing more. I wasted a lot of time with women like this.


I don’t have an Instagram account anyway. I hate social media and its effects on real world socialization have essentially made me feel like I am doomed. I don’t fit in with the cultural zeitgeist and I am not getting any younger so I sometimes just want to die so I at least won’t suffer anymore.



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03 Nov 2019, 2:08 pm

I haven’t even tried to get a date since I tried the dating site NoLongerLonely but it was a dry well. I just go through my usual day to day living: alone and on the outside looking in.



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11 Nov 2019, 1:00 pm

After my 30th birthday passed, I should’ve killed myself.



martianprincess
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11 Nov 2019, 11:52 pm

If I was single and 30 I'd probably want someone who is ambitious, passionate, goal-oriented, and someone who sets boundaries with themselves and other people (being married to someone who doesn't hasn't been fun). Having a few things in common helps but it's not a requirement. I guess none of those describes a "bad boy." I feel like I want an adult because I hardly ever feel like one myself. :/


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Marknis
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12 Nov 2019, 8:06 am

One of my ex-friends told me she thought I could get a girlfriend and that I was just “overthinking it”. But how can I help but overthink about my situation? I am not getting younger, I am socially isolated, I am pressured to be a certain way instead of being accepted as an individual, and I can’t even make friends with women.



funeralxempire
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12 Nov 2019, 3:57 pm

Marknis wrote:
One of my ex-friends told me she thought I could get a girlfriend and that I was just “overthinking it”. But how can I help but overthink about my situation? I am not getting younger, I am socially isolated, I am pressured to be a certain way instead of being accepted as an individual, and I can’t even make friends with women.


Perhaps putting more focus on the building friendships aspect is worthwhile. I believe that represents a significant portion of how I've had more success compared to you, because it's certainly not my looks, charming personality or witty banter.


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FletcherArrow
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12 Nov 2019, 7:18 pm

Marknis wrote:
People I expressed my frustrations about my chronic singlehood often told me that women in their 30’s get tired of the “bad boys” or “jerks” and will start to consider “nice guys”. However, I am 31 and this still hasn’t happened in my world. I don’t know if it’s because women just don’t see anything special in me or if they are still waiting for men to make the first move. But is it really true women grow tired of “bad boys” in their 30’s. My 20’s are behind me and they were squandered. If my 30’s go the same way, I will probably snap.


It is amazing to me how despite being a social outcast for all of elementary school and being teased terribly from first to 4th grade, somehow I slept with loads of girls. Maybe I did not know how to maintain a relationship, and maybe the hot popular girls thought I was too weird, but somehow, I figured out how to sleep with lots of girls. Now, I know some of you will criticize me for whatever reason, let me tell you this, nothing, and I mean NOTHING is as validating for a guy NT or Aspie as a young women who is willing to get naked and crawl onto your couch and do the simian side-dance with you.

The problem I had always had is the ones I wanted did not always wanted me and when I did sleep with some NT, I often found her confusing and boring and dull and tedious. The same was with male friends. I found it difficult to make sense of the friendship rules. I did have friends, but the relationships were not always satisfying.

Things have gotten better now that I am much, much, much older. I figured out all that eye contact stuff.----You know that eye contact used to really confused me. Teachers would demand eye contact but, MAN it was physically painful. Eye contact was either way too intimate or is was a challenge for aggression. Somehow, I finally figured out how to live among the NTs and find the ones that didn't find me weird.

What am I saying? Well, when I read the misery posts like the one written by the OP I want to offer him guidance and mentor him and coach him on how to get the things he wants. Yes, I am convinced I can help any above average IQ Aspie guy how to overcome what keeps him from having a girlfriend or friends in general.



martianprincess
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12 Nov 2019, 8:12 pm

funeralxempire wrote:
Marknis wrote:
One of my ex-friends told me she thought I could get a girlfriend and that I was just “overthinking it”. But how can I help but overthink about my situation? I am not getting younger, I am socially isolated, I am pressured to be a certain way instead of being accepted as an individual, and I can’t even make friends with women.


Perhaps putting more focus on the building friendships aspect is worthwhile. I believe that represents a significant portion of how I've had more success compared to you, because it's certainly not my looks, charming personality or witty banter.


You're witty and stuff though, boi whatchu mean.


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kraftiekortie
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12 Nov 2019, 8:15 pm

I'm the guy the Millennials say "OK Boomer" to LOL

And I'm short, chubby, nerdy, sort of boring.....yet I've had my share.

I'm just not as witty as Mr. Funeral---nor do I have the rap poetry thing down pat.



Marknis
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12 Nov 2019, 8:46 pm

kraftiekortie wrote:
I'm the guy the Millennials say "OK Boomer" to LOL

And I'm short, chubby, nerdy, sort of boring.....yet I've had my share.


I never knew about that term until I saw a YouTuber mention it and how it’s been run into the ground already.

I’ve seen a woman write that boring men made her disappear and that her boyfriend was an a**hole to their friends but she still loved him.



funeralxempire
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12 Nov 2019, 9:51 pm

martianprincess wrote:
funeralxempire wrote:
Marknis wrote:
One of my ex-friends told me she thought I could get a girlfriend and that I was just “overthinking it”. But how can I help but overthink about my situation? I am not getting younger, I am socially isolated, I am pressured to be a certain way instead of being accepted as an individual, and I can’t even make friends with women.


Perhaps putting more focus on the building friendships aspect is worthwhile. I believe that represents a significant portion of how I've had more success compared to you, because it's certainly not my looks, charming personality or witty banter.


You're witty and stuff though, boi whatchu mean.


D'aww. :oops:


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The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes and ears. It was their final, most essential command.
If you're not careful, the newspapers will have you hating the people who are being oppressed, and loving the people who are doing the oppressing. —Malcolm X
Just a reminder: under international law, an occupying power has no right of self-defense, and those who are occupied have the right and duty to liberate themselves by any means possible.


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13 Nov 2019, 1:09 am

^she is right.


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Marknis
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13 Nov 2019, 11:44 pm

When I was 17, I feared turning the age I am now and nothing getting better. My fears became reality.



GiantHockeyFan
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14 Nov 2019, 7:21 am

Marknis wrote:
I’ve seen a woman write that boring men made her disappear and that her boyfriend was an as*hole to their friends but she still loved him.

Aren't you glad you are not involved with someone as messed up as that?



Marknis
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14 Nov 2019, 8:49 am

GiantHockeyFan wrote:
Marknis wrote:
I’ve seen a woman write that boring men made her disappear and that her boyfriend was an as*hole to their friends but she still loved him.

Aren't you glad you are not involved with someone as messed up as that?


I know those types. They want to be showered with gifts, have extravagant weddings, and actually think it’s ok for their boyfriends to cheat on them as long as they come back to them.