Why are men threatened by a high body count compared to..?

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Well this is another example as to how women seem to respond by a high body count more positively compared to the men for women. Because most women virgins want a guy who is not a virgin. So they seem to be more secure by experienced men compared to the other way around.

I have thought about it but I have seen 90 day fiance enough times to know it it doesnt end well a lot of the time.I just have to have faith that Jesus will send me a woman if I meant to be married.It would be extremely hard to find a suitable church of Christ woman in another country.Although if i did go that route the country would be Germany.I dont need a woman to be happy but it would be nice.My parents are going to leave me at least one McMansion so it wont be a shack lol.

i seem to often have been a day late and a dollar short.

The teenage years are crucial. I missed the boat too. Fortunately I found a great wife from overseas who I was lucky chose to live in Australia.

Only 4% of German women marry foreigners and off that 4% nearly 75% would only consider a German speaking foreigner from the EU so that leave you 1% who would be willing to date an American.

If it's Europe then Ukrainian women would be a good bet, Not only are they as attractive as German women from what I hear they are willing to marry anyone to get out of that country,

A few reasons, but it's mostly insecure or religious men. I've dated lots of confident men where body count never even came up in conversation. It's the insecure ones where it did. In fact, one guy told me: "Men only want women who can be saved."
BIG red flag with that one. Totally ghosted him after that.



Some of my male friends said they feel inadequate when it comes to sex. The basic idea is a virgin will think they're good if they've never experienced anything else, but it's a fallacy. Neither virginity or marriage will tie a person to another person forever unless you're living in the Middle East. Eventually the woman will wonder why she's not feeling what other women are feeling and try something new. We're a huge, internet-connected world now. We share stories.

Sex often isn't great for women until they're comfortable with their own bodies because they have to understand where that awesome little button is that makes the fireworks go off. A woman who's been masturbating since teen-dom has a head start because they know how to position themselves correctly or where to touch, but 80% of women admit they fake orgasms just to make the man feel better.

Or to "just get it over with" -- maybe both.

Isn't faking orgasms counterintuitive in a way, because the more women make it obvious, the man needs to try harder, the more likely he will try harder, and therefore do better?

I was in two major relationships before meeting my wife.

The first was with a young woman who to my knowledge had never had an orgasm and didn't know how to masturbate or even that a woman can masturbate, and seemed to assume that an orgasm was something one can expect to happen as a natural consequence of having intercourse. I feel bad when I think about it, because I feel sorry for anyone, male or female, who can't have an orgasm.

The second major relationship was with a young woman who, on our first sexual encounter, masturbated to a quick orgasm in front of me after having given me a hand job (because she had her period at the time).

In between the first and the second, there were two who did orgasm from penetration only. The first of these did so easily (I suppose you would call her a unicorn) but apparently had difficulty masturbating (she said she needed a special technique involving a bathroom rug and a can of spray starch). The second required a good deal of effort and did not hesitate to express her disappointment if I "failed".

My wife informed me, the first time I was in bed with her, that she could only orgasm "manually". That was more than OK with me.

In my early 30s I was in two relationships in which penetration never happened however for completely different reasons. This wasn't a big problem with me.

There were other times when the relationship never developed to the point where I can say for sure exactly how they "functioned" sexually, however all were experienced and seemed comfortable with their bodies in a sexual way, and it was clear they knew how to give themselves an orgasm, at least. The last person I dated before meeting my wife actually thanked me for performing oral sex on her, on the second date IIRC.

All these experiences happened a long time ago, beginning in 1973. From personal experience, I am not convinced that it's very common for women to not be comfortable with their own bodies. It makes me wonder if this situation, if it is a situation, has for some reason gotten worse over the decades.

If by "nice" you mean women who don't regard men as disposable/replaceable commodities and don't look down on men because of their sexual desires, I would say that everyone I ever dated was "nice", although some had other sorts of issues e.g. anger issues, but not specifically related to sex.

Maybe this has changed as a result of the Internet, "hook-up" apps like Tinder, or possibly out of an increased sense of female empowerment among women in general. There are often times I feel fortunate to not be young and single in today's world.

Changes in marriage patterns might also be involved. When I first started dating, it was apparently "normal" for a 21-year-old woman to quickly start thinking of marriage once she got into a physical relationship, so I would assume many got married in their early 20s. As I got into my late 20s and beyond, I started encountering divorcées who had gotten married in their early 20s but the marriages didn't last. So in theory there wasn't a long period of young adulthood for these women during which they could become "jaded" so to speak. If they found a guy they enjoyed having sex with, they had no motivation to belittle him for wanting it.

Yeah, until quite recently women usually had sex with whomever they were told to, by their family i.e. it was decided for them whom they would marry. In addition, such marriages probably took place very soon after the woman (girl) became physically capable of bearing children (although it should also be considered that puberty occurred at a later age back then compared to now). We have no way to know whether any of those young women actually enjoyed having sex with their (usually older) husbands however I can imagine there were at least a few who did although I imagine most modern women are horrified by the whole idea.

You could argue that modern Western mating practices have "reverted" to what is typical of most animals e.g. apes, with the whole "alpha male" thing going on.

In all fairness, however, Western society seems to have a stronger culture of "romantic love" than other cultures. In contrast, Asian societies seem to have mostly stories about young people who fall in love but are never able to consummate those desires. Europe, being dominated by Christianity and Judaism, has no tradition of plural marriage or of keeping concubines, so at least there is more of an expectation of one women per man than in those other cultures, which I suppose is more conducive to romantic love and even love matches that lead to marriage.

This supposedly results from some idea I've encountered on the Internet about men being more entitled to orgasms than women. If there are actually men and women out there who feel that way then I feel sorry for them. I have always felt desolate if I couldn't bring a partner to orgasm and have always been willing to try whatever was needed, even if it didn't work. Why isn't that "normal"?

So most people won't try harder out of selfishness then?

I don't know if "selfish" is the right word. "Self-centered"? To me, sex with a partner who doesn't get off is like the time I ordered a beer in Iceland and discovered they didn't allow (at the time, anyway) alcoholic beer (although Vodka was not problem for them). Unfortunately, it does happen but I don't know why anybody would feel good about it. It's like my first relationship. I came inside her (very often she initiated), apparently she enjoyed the act, but nothing was really happening. I think I might have tried harder to stay in that relationship otherwise. It's very difficult for me to imagine why anybody would be OK with this? Selfish? Sorry, I just don't get that.

Oh ok. But if a guy doesn't try very hard to make the woman orgasm and therefore doesn't care and they are self centered, why would the woman try to fake it to try to make him feel good about it if he doesn't care anyway?

That's a good question. You should probably ask some women you know personally why they think a woman would do that.

I can think of a couple possibilities:

She doesn't want him to dump her because he's supporting her financially etc.
It's some thing related to Tinder hookups. I have no experience with Tinder so please don't ask me a follow-up question about that.

But it's really a question for ladies to answer.