I give up

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I can only say this --- do not just be any other guy, just be yourself...

Liberal Christian aspie whose main interests are oral sex and fetishes?

I bet there are plenty in the Austin area. Probably in the largest cities in TX too. You just need to find them.

I think a good starting point would be one or more of your local fetish communities. (They exist everywhere.) There are national and regional fetish clubs that you can join or contact online, and they have regular meetings and fun events. I've noticed that a lot of people who are involved with fetish communities tend to be liberal Aspie types.

The Simpsons and South Park are good ways to find common ground with anyone anywhere.

If I were you, I'd seek out the fetish people where you live, have good geeky, liberal, intellectual conversations with them, get to know them. Bring up Christianity slowly. If you simply say, "I'm Christian," right off the bat, you could come across as a fundamentalist and people might regard you with suspicion - especially if you're new to the community. But if people have gotten to know you well enough to know that you're liberal, open-minded and into fetishes, they'll probably be pretty accepting, especially if you bring it up slowly or casually (like if the topic comes up in conversation). Fetish people tend to be really open-minded, so they'll likely be interested to hear about your beliefs once they trust you're not going to use them as an excuse to undermine the community.

Hope that's helpful . . .

Just look up for a girl, stare at the skies... and then when time comes...

'Hi, can we talk?'

Do not take rejection personally though...

I'm not saying this as an insult, but if I'm a guy with Aspergers who wouldn't hang out with Tim if I was paid to, what's a semi-good looking woman going to think about his weird theories and viewpoints on life? He's almost like Cliff from Cheers without the comedic timing.

Do we really need to accept the alternative of no girls if we aren't able to have girls who we can attract?

And in Singapore, unfortunately, if we aren't married... We are pressured by parents, 'oh why don't you get married... Try matchmaking?' Forced marriages! Oh dear I feel unhappy and scared when I write this!

I have seen other people talk about stuff similar to what I talk about, and they don't get trashed. I am being singled out.

Do not worry about feishes... Just go for it and chase for your love, man!

Another thing:

Even if sex weren't at the forefront of my mind, people think I am some sort of phony because I don't fit some ridiculous stereotype of what certain people should be.

For example, I am a Christian, but people doubt that I am because I am not some crazy right-wing fundamentalist who watches the 700 Club.

Don't worry. In the end, just make it clear that you have the final say in the relationship, because you still have the final say when you're in a stable relationship with a female...

The reason I have so many rules is:

a) I am afraid to say what is really on my mind, because I am worried that people will think less of me if it's something they don't want to hear.

b) I fear that I will be in a relationship where the partner will try to control me.

Tim, being nice and coddling you doesn't work, being brutally honest and borderline insulting doesn't work. I will try one last time to explain what I've tried to get across as well as others.

You have these preconceived notions and generalizations in your head "Because I'm this, people won't like me." No one is thinking the things you worry about. You don't even seem to know who "Tim" really is. You base it on things you've seen in cartoons or limited experience in relationships.

Before you even worry about getting a girlfriend, I'd suggest some counseling if you aren't talking to someone already, get your brain sorted out, your pretzel logic straightened out, and work with a clearer mind.

Insecure people that lack an identity are a turn off to most women, aspie or NT. Also, I understand the Simpsons and South Park are your special interests, but a woman does not have to like them to like you. What you should be looking for, after you do some soul searching and get the help you need, is a woman that doesn't get in the way of your special interests or doesn't mind watching an episode on occasion.

A woman liking South Park or the Simpsons has no bearing on her sexual appetite or religious beliefs. Where you get these ideas, I have no idea, and you need some psycho-analysis to figure out why your brain works the way it does.

There is no simple formula that will allow you to get a girlfriend. You just have to be a confident, likeable guy that displays a bit of a normalcy, and I don't mean NT kind of normalcy, I just mean a guy that makes sense to other people.

No matter what happened...

Remember, relationships are all two-sided... And this is a fact. One gives and another accepts...

So we just work hard in our relationships...