AS Males what are your views on girls

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No friends agree on everything, I am talking agreeing on a set of basic value systems, you might even disagree on politics or religion but still have much of the same value system and thus have a basis for friendship.




Oh I never got the impression that you did not enjoy debate or disagreement, quite to the contrary. I do however get the impression that you date women that you do not intrinsically respect as an means to an end (sex, children like you said above). This will never be the foundation of healthy relationships and you can not blame women for this... nor will it be an interesting or simulating one. In fact leading a woman on in such a fashion.. is misogynistic. It reveals the belief that no women will be your match, and further more that these women don't deserve a better partner. If you dislike women so much, do us a favor and stay away.

Last edited by Yasmine on 16 Mar 2010, 8:03 pm, edited 1 time in total.

My lesbian friend told me that herself. She said that she learnt to appreciate men from an intellectual point of view, whereas most of the lesbians she knows simply hate men.



Do note that she has BPD and at one point was abused by a man time in her past.



I never implied that all women are b*****s... at all. I know several women who are kind and decent.



Rape is a mixture of unbridled desire, sexual frustration and a lack of care for other people's feelings. When this lack of care turns to hate, the desire to destroy a woman's psyche may be a more important motivation than desire but to claim that violence is the prime motivation of rape is completely nonsensical.



You're misrepresenting pretty much everything I say here, so it's you who's being prejudiced.

It seems to me she's spot on.

Seriously, you consider yourself an intellectual? Seriously? Sex with a minor is called statutory rape because minor children are not deemed capable of consenting to sex. Because they're children, they can't fully understand the consequences of having sex, and therefore cannot consent.

Are you actually trying to say that raping a minor is an overtly sexual act? You're saying that raping a child is about sexual desire, rather than violence? Again, have you been drinking? I'd actually feel better if you told me you're drunk off your a$$ right now. "Rape is about violence claim?" It's not a claim, it's not a theory - it's called research, pal. There's no debate - you missed that boat about thirty years ago. Hey, here's another bulletin for you: woman don't "ask" to be raped by dressing provocatively, either.....oh, and smoking causes cancer (just in case you and the rest of the gang at the Algonquin missed that one).

Your views about rape says more about you than it does about men in general. I hope you have much of this self-control you speak of.

I don't feel like women have overlooked me nor do I disrespect women. Unlike many other people, I have been in relationships with a few women and those women received all the love a man could possibly give. In fact, in a way they used me to make themselves feel better about themselves until the point they no longer needed me. That's hardly what one would expect of a misogynist.



My best friends and I have grown towards one another with regards to basic value systems. The result of endless conversations about these topics inevitably leads to mutually influencing one another. Some of them had belief systems very different from mine when we became friends, though.

I think it's mostly having an open mind and enjoying open discussion about pretty much everything that is the basis for these friendships. If you have an open mind, you respect one anothers differences even if your basic value systems clash.



Well, I usually just allowed myself to fall in love with anyone showing interest in me. I guess that was a mistake.

I have some hope, though. There's a woman I've been talking on MSN with for a while and although she doesn't share my intellectual interests she does seem to share a similar outlook on life, a similar lifestyle, a similar personality and a similar taste in music. That alone is rare enough and I really hope that we can get along in real life as well as we do on MSN.



I just dislike the average woman a bit more than the average man, but I'm aware there are exceptions among both genders.



Then both of you don't have a clue.



So a 14-year-old or 15-year-old cannot decide for himself or herself whether he or she is ready for sex, but a 16-year-old or 18-year-old (depending on the legal age) can? That's just plain idiocy in my opinion. Every individual is different and while some may not be ready in their early twenties others are mature enough well before they're 16.



Yes.



No they don't, but they do increase their chances of attracting the wrong kind of men. While I don't agree with the dress code for women in Islamic countries, I would definitely say their reasoning behind it (protecting women from sexual predators) is valid.

no form of uninsulting words convays my feelings about what you are saying
[img][650:603]http://desuchan.net/dawa/src/1244224303941.jpg[/img]

I assume that "to catch a predator" is some show about adult men who 'groom' minors into having sex with them. If this is false you can disregard the rest of this post.

Don't think for a second that sexual relations with an adult man and a minor is not riddled with power play, coercion and dominance. Even in relationships where there victim is not a minor can this be a very serious form of abuse. It is violence, physical or no.

Seeing the women's thread on this lead me here


I'm in a position where I have a few major ideas that I entertain.

The most important is a girl who marches to the beat of her own drum - knows who she is, has intelligence but more important *wisdom*. I need someone who I can talk to and who can relate on the level, for me that's where good chemistry comes from - when I talk to a woman and feel like I've already known her for a lifetime or longer. As far as must haves - creative, inquisitive about life, wants to learn and grow, wants to keep learning new things, prefers to resolve conflicts rather than thriving on them, someone who wants to be with someone who wants an equal and who wants the same things.

One thing important enough to be separated and mentioned on its own - I want to be into someone who's as into music as I am, preferably deeper/existentially-loaded stuff. Doesn't have to be what I'm into, I think things will actually be more interesting if its something entirely different like folk, blues, etc.. Also, someone who respects what I'm into - you have to be ok with dating a guy who's very into jungle/drum&bass.

As far as sexuality is concerned I get driven wild a couple of ways. When I do see a girl who seems anachronistic, almost like something out of a fairytale, it drives me wild - I think main reason being internal similarity to myself (feeling like I've known someone 100 years or like they're part of some greater family beyond anything we know of the physical world? This type makes my hair stand on end - in a good way - almost instantly). At the same time, while I am wildly attracted to women who are like that (being a bit of the same thing myself) I'd hope I have the luck to meet a girl who both as that sort of nature but also has a very practical, strong, self-suffient side; someone who can function as something of a pseudo-NT very well and on call, perhaps has almost an equal blend of aspie and NT in her. Meeting people like that is rare but, wow, I couldn't hit the jackpot harder if I did meet someone like that.

On a more worldy/practical not, having dated mostly NTs, I think I've noticed what sort of NT works for me as well. I've noticed that if I am going to date and marry and NT, I'm probably looking at a soljah-ette. I don't mean a girl who has herself thugged out, just both very feminine and virile, girls who were perhaps in the harder side of the in-crowd but came out of it very worldwise. When I say feminine but virile, watch 'Descent', I tend to attract that type of girl and bring out her maternal side but, at the same time, they have enough of an edge that it balances things out (also, of course, past experiences and social lives/values/philosophies typically balance out well).

Also, either way, aspie or NT, the devil's smile hooks me as well. A girl who can give a simultaneously maternal/reassuring but sly/crooked smile is throwing a type of energy in my direction that I get a lot out of on a lot of levels. No, I definitely don't want a narcissist, but social 'slippiness' is something that again, it seems to fuel something that I like to get out of myself and when someone is positing an energy in me - I feel like my well is less empty or like I have to strain or struggle less to fill it on my own.

Last edited by techstepgenr8tion on 16 Mar 2010, 8:31 pm, edited 2 times in total.

It is because of those accusations, as well as a similar incident years before, that I became extremely concerned about what others think.

Tim, when people start saying stupid things, making accusations, etc. I just tell them to take a number and get in line with everyone else. I just don't have time to deal with idiots. One thing that real women like is a man who knows who he is and won't take crap from anyone.

yeah...really seems like you do tim

Well regarding your other posts and accounts Salon, there's a lot I could say that could connect the dots but I won't.

I'm not sure anyone's feedback is going to help much. It would be hard for me to ask yourself how you'd feel if you were a woman and guy told you how inferior women were to you and why a woman asks for it when she's dressed a certain way or goes into a place alone b/c of her gender. You'd be pissed if it was the other way around I'm sure.

Also another note, when you say bitchy, does the same apply to guys who rant and rave? Just something to think about when you bring up these generalizations regarding women.

Back to the original topic:

Spiritual, Philosophical, Loves Nature, Enjoys healthy, Natural ways of living, Has similar goals and views on life, intense, passionate, relatively clean, smart, patient, accepting, Earthy, creative, independent, good with children, is willing to respect my need for space and solitude, understands the fact that sometimes I cannot be physically affectionate and that it usually requires a fair ammount of willpower to be affectionate even when I want to be, can talk to for hours without it getting boring or seeming forced, someone whom I can be open with about things that I would never share with anyone else, someone whom is also my best friend.

I am very flexible regarding body type, so long as she is relatively healthy... However, since I am fanticizing, I am most drawn to women who are short, moderately curvy, and have dark eyes.

are you joking? The majority of the abuse i've had has been at the hands of intelligent men. You seem pretty stuck up to me. Maybe they see you as stuck up and don't talk to you?

Yasmine and I don't have a clue? Ok, scarecrow....you just keep believing that.



Yes - it's called the "age of consent" in civilized society, and it takes into account a little thing we big kids call maturity. Protecting children is idiocy? "Others are mature enough [for sex] well before they're 16?" Spoken like a pedophile. Is NAMBLA giving out cards to carry these days, or do you just know each other by sight?



Again, spoken like a pedophile. A sick, disgusting, perverted, criminal, repulsive, horrifying pedophile.



Actually, dress codes in Islamic countries are not intended to protect women from sexual predators. They're really intended to subjugate women. But that really shouldn't bother you - now that you're out with the whole pedophilia thing. How very good for you.

Last edited by HopeGrows on 16 Mar 2010, 8:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.