Living as an adult male virgin, unable to cope

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Joined: 20 Jul 2012
Age: 44
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17 Oct 2012, 7:45 pm

If you have the money: hire a prostitute. Using a prostitute will help you lose your virginity and you may gain confidence from the experience. Sex is just a consumable commodity in our modern society.

Last edited by steviewonderau on 17 Oct 2012, 8:15 pm, edited 2 times in total.

aspiemike
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17 Oct 2012, 8:09 pm

aussiebloke wrote:

I'm sorry porn isn't working out for you :cry:

In that photo, you oddly look like one of my good friend's father. Just thought I would point that out.

To the topic creator. I lost my virginity in a drunken one night stand. I regretted that decision.

aussiebloke
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17 Oct 2012, 8:24 pm

aspiemike wrote:

aussiebloke wrote:

I'm sorry porn isn't working out for you :cry:

thats odd I've never got that , I allways thought I don't look like any one ?

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Theirs a subset of America, adult males who are forgoing ambition ,sex , money ,love ,adventure to sit in a darkened rooms mastering video games - Suicide Bob

aussiebloke
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17 Oct 2012, 8:27 pm

Subotai wrote:

simon_says wrote:

You are at just the right age, imo, to start to learn some social skills. Going abroad is probably a good idea. Travel broadens the mind and provides you with a pretext for talking to fellow expatriots on a regular basis. It's a club of sorts. I would pursue that with everything you've got.

Not to mention the fact that it's just plain easier to get sex when you are a foreigner abroad.

I allways thought that to , though it could be a urban legend ?

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wtfid2
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17 Oct 2012, 9:49 pm

Heisenberg wrote:

I honestly don't remember, it was four years ago. Attending a college that had more females than males helped I guess.

it only helps those who are desirable by females. I've had classes of 30 where sex was taught at times during lecture and I was the only male in the room ,and still I have never had a gf. If you can do it once you can do it again

. It sounds like you got your last gf easily which means you can get a new gf if you work for it.

when i say sex was taught..it was a psych class and those topics came up.

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Your Aspie score: 101 of 200
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You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits

bruinsy33
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17 Oct 2012, 11:27 pm

GiantHockeyFan wrote:

Until a few weeks, I never kissed a girl, never made out, never had sex and never loved anyone in an intimate level. Now, I've done all of them and a few I've done over and over again

Things can change in life very quickly!

Very true! It's sad that men with AS have difficulties with dating/relationships but it's even sadder that many here seem to entirely blame themselves when they have a condition that naturally has built in obstacles.

steviewonderau
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17 Oct 2012, 11:37 pm

We live in a society with a culture of victim blaming. By victim blaming: society is blameless and does not need to accept responsibility for the injustice brought onto the victim. The victim is at fault and is to be blamed for his/her failures in life.

muff
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18 Oct 2012, 12:01 am

bruinsy33 wrote:

GiantHockeyFan wrote:

Until a few weeks, I never kissed a girl, never made out, never had sex and never loved anyone in an intimate level. Now, I've done all of them and a few I've done over and over again

Things can change in life very quickly!

it seemed that things changed very quickly for me as well. i was twenty six if i remember correctly, when i first had sex and i guess you could say that i had quite a bit of it with different girls after that, so i am not sure despair is in order.

i will say though, that just as quickly as it comes, it seems to go and i am certainly going through that right now. this is to say that everything has a season. i simply dont believe in wasted time or opportunities.

Keyman
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18 Oct 2012, 12:07 am

steviewonderau wrote:

It may also leave you with Herpes, Gonorrhea, HPV, HIV, and other STDs. Besides interacting with a person that don't give a s**t about you.

Adam82
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18 Oct 2012, 1:29 am

WantToHaveALife wrote:

GiantHockeyFan wrote:

Until a few weeks, I never kissed a girl, never made out, never had sex and never loved anyone in an intimate level. Now, I've done all of them and a few I've done over and over again

Things can change in life very quickly!

you were a virgin until age 29?

I still am one, and I'm 30. I would be interested in hearing how GiantHockeyFan managed to turn things around.

I am starting to doubt if things ever will improve for me, relationship wise.

OlivG
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18 Oct 2012, 2:17 am

Adam82 wrote:

I would be interested in hearing how GiantHockeyFan managed to turn things around.

This.

GiantHockeyFan
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18 Oct 2012, 8:08 am

Glad to. I did hit the gym and change my diet making myself physically more attractive but that's not why I did that, nor do I think that's why I ended up being successful. Without going into many personal details, I restarted my OKCupid account with the premise that I was after conversations, not a mate. I did have one woman contact me and while she wasn't physically attractive seemed intelligent and we had a nice chat but she stopped communicating. Rather than getting upset, I was thankful for the opportunity to talk. Then, I got another message from my now GF talking about how she misses the NHL. Let me emphasize that she had a DREADFUL profile without a picture. One thing led to another and I eventually had a 2 hour phone conversation with her and invited her to watch a few local hockey games (as a fellow hockey fan). Surprisingly she said yes and we spent the whole day together. I did notice she seemed very bored and never looked at me but I assumed she might be Autistic as well. Turns out she was extremely nervous which I never picked up on until she told me. I was all set to drive her home after hockey when she asked to go for a late night walk downtown. I accepted and after talking and walking for a while, our hands ended up together (she joked later how I missed all her hints!). We had another conversation on the drive home and I did something I never thought I would do: I planted a kiss right on her lips while she was leaving, catching her totally off guard.

We met again and I wasn't too pleased with how distant she was until I realized she was just scared of another boyfriend cheating on her and assured her I would prove my loyalty and trust. Once I got that information, everything started to fall into place. As for sleeping over and getting it on, I would have never done it if she didn't flat out tell me she wanted to sleep over at my place. I can't say this is "the one" at this stage but things have escalated very quickly between us.

bruinsy33
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18 Oct 2012, 1:08 pm

GiantHockeyFan wrote:

Good stuff! It sounds like you just kept trying .I like the fact that it seemed like you weren't about to waste a whole lot of time on a woman if she wasn't truly interested,it is always best to move on quickly.Good luck.

steviewonderau
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18 Oct 2012, 8:22 pm

Keyman wrote:

steviewonderau wrote:

It may also leave you with Herpes, Gonorrhea, HPV, HIV, and other STDs. Besides interacting with a person that don't give a sh** about you.

Condoms prevent most STIs. Most sex workers make their clients use condoms.

GiantHockeyFan
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18 Oct 2012, 10:01 pm

bruinsy33 wrote:

Thanks. That's where I slipped up a lot. I tended to obsess over one and only one woman and when I eventually figured out they were 100% not interested I was absolutely devastated! It would take weeks and even months to recover from the rejection. Now, I know it's THEIR loss, not mine. Let's just say my GF can tell you how satisfying I am and she asked again tonight if I was sure I didn't want to admit to previous relationships because I'm so skilled in the bedroom :lol:

WantToHaveALife
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20 Oct 2012, 1:26 am

tired of masturbating

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