auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,264
Location: the island of defective toy santas
31 May 2015, 11:32 pm
AlexandertheSolitary wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
sex is nigh well impossible for some of us to obtain.
Fair point. I am actually more comfortable with a more submissive, steretypically feminine role, with more initiative from the female, provided she was not too aggressive and frightened me away. I am aware that some would find this pathetic, others sweet, but perhaps not especially desirable; so be it, it would be worse to pretend to be someone else. I accept that some of my ethical constraints may act as self-limiting factors, but no more than being picky about fetishes or having only one physical "type" for example. My method does require a degree of patience, which is not invariably my strongest suit.
mee too about being passive and [quasi] "feminine." probably that part is a manifestation of omega-male status.
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,264
Location: the island of defective toy santas
31 May 2015, 11:54 pm
AlexandertheSolitary wrote:
That sounds rather sad 
. I think a loving relationship outside of wedlock would be arguably preferable to marrying for the wrong reasons, and am puzzled by the appeal of sexual intercourse (as opposed to lovemaking) without regard for the other. Obviously there are times when I really would like simply either to hold a woman without consequence, or gratify my libidinous impulses without consequences, but practically and morally that would not be an option that I even wish to pursue. Surely fantasies and associated habits would be preferable to involving a fellow human being.
. I think a loving relationship outside of wedlock would be arguably preferable to marrying for the wrong reasons, and am puzzled by the appeal of sexual intercourse (as opposed to lovemaking) without regard for the other. Obviously there are times when I really would like simply either to hold a woman without consequence, or gratify my libidinous impulses without consequences, but practically and morally that would not be an option that I even wish to pursue. Surely fantasies and associated habits would be preferable to involving a fellow human being.what do you think of escort services where there is a fairly straightforward exchange going on? maybe if you got it done out of your system it would take the pressure off? if you are still young I know there's gotta be some feeling of libidinal urgency. I know there was in my case. this aspie wants you to be able to experience this before you get old and no longer capable of it, IOW don't turn out on the eunuch end of the scale like this old man
, take advantage of your testosterone while you still have it.
01 Jun 2015, 12:35 am
auntblabby wrote:
AlexandertheSolitary wrote:
That sounds rather sad . I think a loving relationship outside of wedlock would be arguably preferable to marrying for the wrong reasons, and am puzzled by the appeal of sexual intercourse (as opposed to lovemaking) without regard for the other. Obviously there are times when I really would like simply either to hold a woman without consequence, or gratify my libidinous impulses without consequences, but practically and morally that would not be an option that I even wish to pursue. Surely fantasies and associated habits would be preferable to involving a fellow human being.
. I think a loving relationship outside of wedlock would be arguably preferable to marrying for the wrong reasons, and am puzzled by the appeal of sexual intercourse (as opposed to lovemaking) without regard for the other. Obviously there are times when I really would like simply either to hold a woman without consequence, or gratify my libidinous impulses without consequences, but practically and morally that would not be an option that I even wish to pursue. Surely fantasies and associated habits would be preferable to involving a fellow human being.what do you think of escort services where there is a fairly straightforward exchange going on? maybe if you got it done out of your system it would take the pressure off? if you are still young I know there's gotta be some feeling of libidinal urgency. I know there was in my case. this aspie wants you to be able to experience this before you get old and no longer capable of it, IOW don't turn out on the eunuch end of the scale like this old man
, take advantage of your testosterone while you still have it.Actually, an at least temporary loss of libido while I am waiting would make my life rather easier! I am not sure how to respond to the query without becoming more controversial; there are lots of complicated issues to discuss, and in some cases girls may be exploited; there are also impacts for the client's relations with others, all sorts of knotty discussions. I am tempted to hint that perhaps sometimes one could just vent on one's own? It is not pleasant, and has an impact on one's mind and potentially how one relates to others, but at least the effect is mainly confined to oneself. I am only 33, and am rather shy and romantic. I would prefer to wait. It is a real possibility that I may never marry, or that by the time I do it is too late to father children (which I would personally regret) but do not regard the "eunuch scenario" (I have been thinking about eunuchs a lot as it happens, which I know is decidedly odd, but historically they were among the few perhaps naively trusted to safely care for women without other male supervision; not being one can make being treated as though one were just another friend rather awkward, though I do value my friendships; perhaps it would be helpful to have elder males to discuss things I would not be comfortable sharing with ladies) as the worst that could happen. I would rather die in monastic seclusion than become pathologically unfaithful or addicted to manipulation (I am aware that some of my alternatives are quite extreme, and do not apply to most of those merrily making love). I appreciate the thoughtful responses.
Also, I honestly find it odd that my position should be regarded as odder or more pathological than people who do not seem to consider consequences or people (to clarify, I am talking here more of manipulative and abusive men, and "enchantress" like manipulative women - whether those who enjoy mind games or those who use the same techniques to achieve specific desires without regard to the consequences for either other women or men, or at times for themselves, not unwed lovers in general). I am aware that there is a risk of my dying single, but abandoning all my principles would not in practical terms improve my chances (I'd risk becoming rather creepy to be honest).
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,264
Location: the island of defective toy santas
01 Jun 2015, 12:43 am
01 Jun 2015, 1:12 am
01 Jun 2015, 1:13 am
auntblabby wrote:
what do you think of escort services where there is a fairly straightforward exchange going on? maybe if you got it done out of your system it would take the pressure off? if you are still young I know there's gotta be some feeling of libidinal urgency. I know there was in my case. this aspie wants you to be able to experience this before you get old and no longer capable of it, IOW don't turn out on the eunuch end of the scale like this old man , take advantage of your testosterone while you still have it.
, take advantage of your testosterone while you still have it.I'm way ahead of you on that. In my mid 20's, the prime of life for most men, I was seeing escorts up to twice a month, but usually less often. I was even attending highly discreet escort conventions. The escorting (stress on the E) community in my area knew me by name. I've been with escorts of all ages and ethnicities. Life was sweet! To this day, I had more sex partners than some of my NT friends, who did not turn to escorts and instead prefer relationship sex. (It's something I'll never understand, but they're full-grown men, and the choice is theirs and theirs alone.)
Now, at age 32, my sex drive plummeted, and I now see escorts three times a year at the absolute maximum.
auntblabby
Veteran
Joined: 12 Feb 2010
Gender: Male
Posts: 115,264
Location: the island of defective toy santas
01 Jun 2015, 1:17 am
Aspie1 wrote:
Now, at age 32, my sex drive plummeted, and I now see escorts three times a year at the absolute maximum.
lucky you to be able to afford all that!
01 Jun 2015, 7:56 am
01 Jun 2015, 7:59 am
01 Jun 2015, 1:28 pm
Loveurself
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 29 Jun 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 67
Location: North Dakota
01 Jun 2015, 4:22 pm
Aspie1 wrote:
auntblabby wrote:
what do you think of escort services where there is a fairly straightforward exchange going on? maybe if you got it done out of your system it would take the pressure off? if you are still young I know there's gotta be some feeling of libidinal urgency. I know there was in my case. this aspie wants you to be able to experience this before you get old and no longer capable of it, IOW don't turn out on the eunuch end of the scale like this old man , take advantage of your testosterone while you still have it.
, take advantage of your testosterone while you still have it.I'm way ahead of you on that. In my mid 20's, the prime of life for most men, I was seeing escorts up to twice a month, but usually less often. I was even attending highly discreet escort conventions. The escorting (stress on the E) community in my area knew me by name. I've been with escorts of all ages and ethnicities. Life was sweet! To this day, I had more sex partners than some of my NT friends, who did not turn to escorts and instead prefer relationship sex. (It's something I'll never understand, but they're full-grown men, and the choice is theirs and theirs alone.)
Now, at age 32, my sex drive plummeted, and I now see escorts three times a year at the absolute maximum.
I'm not going to sugarcoat this. Most escorts are not just paid subservient actresses, but more like women and children who are being held against their will, beaten, and tortured with painful sex, to "feed" the sexual desire of men and the booming human-trafficking "business."
Those escorts, which, most have either mental disorders, an abusive past, no where to live, or are being held as sex slaves (which is highly probable), strung out on drugs due to self medicating for some kind of mental/mood disorder etc., are women who are someone's daughter/sister/mother/future wife or wife, that are being used as a human toilet. Even the supposed pretty and "clean" ones are being taken advantage of. how do you think that affects them. A lot of them eventually kill themselves in one form or another.
Having sex with someone you don't know as business transaction, degrades women and the sanctity of marraige or overall the human race. You don't know what tragedies led to that "escort" ending up in a bed with you. Overall, you are just taking advantage of someone's misfortune and adding to their pain. Is a few minutes really worth using an emotionally distressed and possible kidnaped person as a used public toilet.
That is not how sex was intended to be.
And after all that "sex," what kind of impression will it have on your psyche when you settle down with another woman as your wife. How will having sex with all those "prostitutes,"affect the way you see her, hold her. Don't think your actions won't have some kind of lasting impression on you; the same YOU, that you will bring into a marraige before God, because after all, who are your vows ultimately being made to??? (We all have choices)
The use of women as human toilets (whether paid or not), add to the continued misuse and mistreatment of women and the overall dilution of marraige in our sex crazed society. Everybody wants it NOW,so when the real thing comes along it becomes diluted.
This is sad. I've been hurt before and guys who are out there looking for just the NOW, are destroying people without even realizing it, while others just don't care.
I would rather wait and hope the MAN I marry, won't be someone who has degraded women, to satisfy his own needs because who is to say, he won't be like that in the marriage.
01 Jun 2015, 5:21 pm
Loveurself wrote:
And after all that "sex," what kind of impression will it have on your psyche when you settle down with another woman as your wife. How will having sex with all those "prostitutes,"affect the way you see her, hold her. Don't think your actions won't have some kind of lasting impression on you; the same YOU, that you will bring into a marraige before God, because after all, who are your vows ultimately being made to??? (We all have choices)
...
I would rather wait and hope the MAN I marry, won't be someone who has degraded women, to satisfy his own needs because who is to say, he won't be like that in the marriage.
...
I would rather wait and hope the MAN I marry, won't be someone who has degraded women, to satisfy his own needs because who is to say, he won't be like that in the marriage.
I found these escorts extremely helpful, and not just in emptying out a certain anatomical part. They helped me learn what I like and what I don't like in bed. They helped me learn what kind of personality I find most arousing (dark, feisty kind). They helped me learn what it's like to simply be nude in bed with a woman (sex or no sex), a completely unimaginable experience, before I picked up the damn phone and scheduled a "date". (I had free sex as well, but escort sex was much hotter.) So I'm pretty sure that if I'm forced into marriage somehow, I'll be more comfortable making sexy time with my wife too.
If god (notice the lack of capitalization) made me a beta male, and an butt-ugly one to boot, he shouldn't be surprised I'm seeing escorts. The hell I'm going to can't possibly be much worse than this sorry excuse for a planet. I just hope the handbasket has complimentary dramamine; I know it's supposed to be punishment, but I get motion sickness
.I'm not looking to marry you, either. So rest assured.
Loveurself
Yellow-bellied Woodpecker
Joined: 29 Jun 2014
Gender: Female
Posts: 67
Location: North Dakota
01 Jun 2015, 8:18 pm
Aspie1 wrote:
Loveurself wrote:
And after all that "sex," what kind of impression will it have on your psyche when you settle down with another woman as your wife. How will having sex with all those "prostitutes,"affect the way you see her, hold her. Don't think your actions won't have some kind of lasting impression on you; the same YOU, that you will bring into a marraige before God, because after all, who are your vows ultimately being made to??? (We all have choices)
...
I would rather wait and hope the MAN I marry, won't be someone who has degraded women, to satisfy his own needs because who is to say, he won't be like that in the marriage.
...
I would rather wait and hope the MAN I marry, won't be someone who has degraded women, to satisfy his own needs because who is to say, he won't be like that in the marriage.
I found these escorts extremely helpful, and not just in emptying out a certain anatomical part. They helped me learn what I like and what I don't like in bed. They helped me learn what kind of personality I find most arousing (dark, feisty kind). They helped me learn what it's like to simply be nude in bed with a woman (sex or no sex), a completely unimaginable experience, before I picked up the damn phone and scheduled a "date". (I had free sex as well, but escort sex was much hotter.) So I'm pretty sure that if I'm forced into marriage somehow, I'll be more comfortable making sexy time with my wife too.
If god (notice the lack of capitalization) made me a beta male, and an butt-ugly one to boot, he shouldn't be surprised I'm seeing escorts. The hell I'm going to can't possibly be much worse than this sorry excuse for a planet. I just hope the handbasket has complimentary dramamine; I know it's supposed to be punishment, but I get motion sickness
.I'm not looking to marry you, either. So rest assured.
Good job in disclosing to everyone your "beliefs."
Good luck with that.
Ban-Dodger
Veteran
Joined: 2 Jun 2011
Age: 1028
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,820
Location: Возможно в будущее к Россию идти... можеть быть...
01 Jun 2015, 10:15 pm
This thread/post now needs a "schools exist that teach/educate women on how to be professional-dates/hookers/prostitutes" video...
Loveurself wrote:
I'm not going to sugarcoat this. Most escorts are not just paid subservient actresses, but more like women and children who are being held against their will, beaten, and tortured with painful sex, to "feed" the sexual desire of men and the booming human-trafficking "business."
Those escorts, which, most have either mental disorders, an abusive past, no where to live, or are being held as sex slaves (which is highly probable), strung out on drugs due to self medicating for some kind of mental/mood disorder etc., are women who are someone's daughter/sister/mother/future wife or wife, that are being used as a human toilet. Even the supposed pretty and "clean" ones are being taken advantage of. how do you think that affects them. A lot of them eventually kill themselves in one form or another.
Having sex with someone you don't know as business transaction, degrades women and the sanctity of marraige or overall the human race. You don't know what tragedies led to that "escort" ending up in a bed with you. Overall, you are just taking advantage of someone's misfortune and adding to their pain. Is a few minutes really worth using an emotionally distressed and possible kidnaped person as a used public toilet.
That is not how sex was intended to be.
And after all that "sex," what kind of impression will it have on your psyche when you settle down with another woman as your wife. How will having sex with all those "prostitutes,"affect the way you see her, hold her. Don't think your actions won't have some kind of lasting impression on you; the same YOU, that you will bring into a marraige before God, because after all, who are your vows ultimately being made to??? (We all have choices)
The use of women as human toilets (whether paid or not), add to the continued misuse and mistreatment of women and the overall dilution of marraige in our sex crazed society. Everybody wants it NOW,so when the real thing comes along it becomes diluted.
This is sad. I've been hurt before and guys who are out there looking for just the NOW, are destroying people without even realizing it, while others just don't care.
I would rather wait and hope the MAN I marry, won't be someone who has degraded women, to satisfy his own needs because who is to say, he won't be like that in the marriage.
Those escorts, which, most have either mental disorders, an abusive past, no where to live, or are being held as sex slaves (which is highly probable), strung out on drugs due to self medicating for some kind of mental/mood disorder etc., are women who are someone's daughter/sister/mother/future wife or wife, that are being used as a human toilet. Even the supposed pretty and "clean" ones are being taken advantage of. how do you think that affects them. A lot of them eventually kill themselves in one form or another.
Having sex with someone you don't know as business transaction, degrades women and the sanctity of marraige or overall the human race. You don't know what tragedies led to that "escort" ending up in a bed with you. Overall, you are just taking advantage of someone's misfortune and adding to their pain. Is a few minutes really worth using an emotionally distressed and possible kidnaped person as a used public toilet.
That is not how sex was intended to be.
And after all that "sex," what kind of impression will it have on your psyche when you settle down with another woman as your wife. How will having sex with all those "prostitutes,"affect the way you see her, hold her. Don't think your actions won't have some kind of lasting impression on you; the same YOU, that you will bring into a marraige before God, because after all, who are your vows ultimately being made to??? (We all have choices)
The use of women as human toilets (whether paid or not), add to the continued misuse and mistreatment of women and the overall dilution of marraige in our sex crazed society. Everybody wants it NOW,so when the real thing comes along it becomes diluted.
This is sad. I've been hurt before and guys who are out there looking for just the NOW, are destroying people without even realizing it, while others just don't care.
I would rather wait and hope the MAN I marry, won't be someone who has degraded women, to satisfy his own needs because who is to say, he won't be like that in the marriage.
...plus another one by George Carlin about selling and f*****g...
I am also going to re-quote a portion of the writings of The Messiah from God's Testament of Truth writings...
http://www.the-testament-of-truth.co.uk/truth/testamnt/test126.htm wrote:
~ Sex "Solo" & "Sex Sacred" ~
Eons of time ago the satanic force placed a "hex" on sex, this I know. The hex being that it was not "proper" to love unless "sanctified by men" who said they were empowered from above.
These same men also wore "frocks" and also falsely believed that for them sex was "improper" as it in some way deprived them of "hearing" God's say. Little by little the dark force via the minds of these men did gain control over all "lovers" who on earth did stroll.
They also "said" that if a "union" by them was not sanctified then it was a "sin." So this very "marriage by men" act that was backed by a demand for "sex with one only" as a "solo" partner caused much harm and guilt, for "mankind" can see that others also "attractive" be.
My sacred pen does say that once all darkness is swept away then none will see any "wrong" and all minds and beliefs will be strong. Thus all will be free to entwine with one or more or many.
Yes, even if one does take a "mate" they can and will at times enjoy to play tennis with another, or in the evening with them dance and dine or even with them sexually entwine. None will see this as wrong as all will heed God's call of "Respect all as you walk along."
So it is at this time that "sex" the act thereof will be sacred. For all who entwine will so do with their love divine outpouring all the time. Thus the union will be blest by God for as said and seen by me, our God above is pure love.
So any of you who would be happy then control none and you will see that none would seek to control thee. All soon will be free to laugh and dance and sing fearlessly, and "as" one does a "special" angel meet then no doubt they will be delighted to "sweep them off their feet."
When two 'lovers' meet (with or without any marriage 'ownership' pact), their love shines, and this lovingness with its positive desire suppresses the 'power of inner sin,' being the dark emotions within.
Once the 'honeymoon' is over then via the dark emotions the darkness critically imposes its demands upon the 'bed of roses' and some 'fault' is found with the others way that results in demands, vindictiveness or other controlling power play. Try and be loving in all you do. Criticise none and thus to self be true.
Eons of time ago the satanic force placed a "hex" on sex, this I know. The hex being that it was not "proper" to love unless "sanctified by men" who said they were empowered from above.
These same men also wore "frocks" and also falsely believed that for them sex was "improper" as it in some way deprived them of "hearing" God's say. Little by little the dark force via the minds of these men did gain control over all "lovers" who on earth did stroll.
They also "said" that if a "union" by them was not sanctified then it was a "sin." So this very "marriage by men" act that was backed by a demand for "sex with one only" as a "solo" partner caused much harm and guilt, for "mankind" can see that others also "attractive" be.
My sacred pen does say that once all darkness is swept away then none will see any "wrong" and all minds and beliefs will be strong. Thus all will be free to entwine with one or more or many.
Yes, even if one does take a "mate" they can and will at times enjoy to play tennis with another, or in the evening with them dance and dine or even with them sexually entwine. None will see this as wrong as all will heed God's call of "Respect all as you walk along."
So it is at this time that "sex" the act thereof will be sacred. For all who entwine will so do with their love divine outpouring all the time. Thus the union will be blest by God for as said and seen by me, our God above is pure love.
So any of you who would be happy then control none and you will see that none would seek to control thee. All soon will be free to laugh and dance and sing fearlessly, and "as" one does a "special" angel meet then no doubt they will be delighted to "sweep them off their feet."
When two 'lovers' meet (with or without any marriage 'ownership' pact), their love shines, and this lovingness with its positive desire suppresses the 'power of inner sin,' being the dark emotions within.
Once the 'honeymoon' is over then via the dark emotions the darkness critically imposes its demands upon the 'bed of roses' and some 'fault' is found with the others way that results in demands, vindictiveness or other controlling power play. Try and be loving in all you do. Criticise none and thus to self be true.
Just so you know, The New Testament was supposed to be various updates to the Old Testament, and The Testament of Truth are the corrections to both the OT™ and NT™. I should also inform you that tastes™ and preferences™ within people do change, depending on their age/evolution/maturity/etc., and sexual-preferences are no exception (similar to how food-preferences are supposed to change depending on how old/experienced you are).
Also, some people need it more than others (just like some people need to eat more food than other people), and there are ladies who do their service™ for the men who otherwise would never be able to "get any"™, and it is a service true, and women DO exist who do want sex without requiring that men who do them need to get into a relationship (but they will probably want to have a man as a husband if she comes across one who has the sexual-energy to be able to make her reach orgasm at least five times before he proceeds to cum inside her). America is one back-ass-wards nation/country in many ways (considering that it's one of the only ones where "selling f*****g" is illegal™). Sex is simply a part of taking care of one's body whether through a partner or via masturbating or getting... textual... with someone(s) on-line. I should also warn you that you eventually become that of which you hate/despise/mock/ridicule (and if not during the current life-time then the next or a future one). I used to be against the player™-types until karmic™ life-circumstances forced me into becoming one myself !
02 Jun 2015, 12:56 am
rvacountrysinger wrote:
I'm confused as to why people copulate if they aren't husband and wife. More importantly, why do people do that if they don't want children? I believe sex is disgusting and for procreation purposes only. I don't see the point in just having sex if you do not intend to reproduce. Why bother? I think that marriage is a contract so that we could procreate in the eyes of God and so that we can produce children. What do people get out of sleeping with someone for any other reason? It is bizarre to me. It disgusts me that people want to have sex and aren't married. How pervasive is this in today's society?
Is this some kind of really weird joke, one that I'm just not getting?
More importantly, why do people eat if they're not really hungry? I believe eating is disgusting and for nutritional purposes only. I don't see the point in just eating if you do not intend to replenish your energy supply. Why bother? I think that food is a necessity so that we could sustain ourselves in the eyes of the Almighty Spaghetti-Monster and so that we can survive long enough to replicate our genes (a.k.a. produce children). What do people get out of eating something that has no nutritional value? It is bizarre to me. It disgusts me that people want to eat; after all, it does come out the other end does it not, and that's just, like, you know - totally gross! How pervasive is this in today's society?
Oh dear!
You need to lie down and have a good Bex, because 'Bex is better!' (Bex is a 1970's Australian thing, fyi, a pill that was touted as the answer to almost anything - like headaches, a pain in the a$$, and prudish Christians on their soapbox pontificating about the 'sinfulness' of anything even remotely fun).
02 Jun 2015, 1:07 am
By the way, and this is completely off-topic, but the 'Love and Dating' section now has 314 discussions listed! We've reached pi! A reason to celebrate! 
| Similar Topics | |
|---|---|
| Abandoning Marriage and Parenting goals PERMANENTLY!!! |
17 Jul 2026, 12:48 pm |
| Abandoning Marriage and Parenting goals PERMANENTLY!!! |
31 Dec 1969, 7:00 pm Guest
|
| Are there a lot of crazy people in this world? |
21 Jul 2026, 7:31 am |
