Help me I have no clue what he is thinking.

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In am in love with a guy with mild aspie/love shyess. I posted here before, and I thought things had been progressing but he is now sending me mixed signals.

So here is the story,

I have met him few months through church, and so we would chat not every sunday but at least twice a month on Sundays after the mass. He is a musician, so I went to his concert once.

I had told him how wonderful he is in his music, and he told me he was very happy to play for me. For the last couple of months, we had some deep conversations about family, life, death and spirituality. He told me about his parents and his sisters, I told him about my family and my anxiety issues.

I thought everything was going well between us and that next I would expect to move to romantic level.

It seems like it is not a problem of him not reading my signs, but he DOES not know what to do with it.

He also seems like he has some days he is comfortable talking with me with good eye contact and some days just really self-conscious and makes inappropriate face expressions.

Last time, he told me that his sister would love to visit my country and that he has another hobboy like he paints. So definitely he seems interested in me because he tells me about himself, but body language was telling me that he was so uncomfortable and nervous with me. I didn't know what to do, and he just left saying he has to go....

I asked him to go to a concert in April, but he refused saying he is not in town at that moment.

Maybe I am pushing too hard? but really he is sending me all the signals. I am not stupid, I have had quite a lot of experience with men, but this is really confusing. Should I grab his hands next time I see him? He already knows I like him, so that's out of the way, but he seems uncomfortable around me on certain days. I was thinking of writing him an E mail of how I feel about him, the qualities that i find attractive etc.

I just don't want to appear so desperate, but I have to push otherwise he won't initiate anything. Even though some days he managed to approach me and talk to me.

Please help me here.

Have you asked him if he likes you?

Speaking for myself, I would not get the signals. You would have to tell me flat out or do something like kissing me. That's the only times I've known that a woman has liked me, and I'm in my 30s, not a teenager. So I can feel for your frustration about it. But being an aspie can sometimes make communicating intentions a very direct and potentially embarrassing process. If you are better at expressing yourself in written form, or if it will make it less embarrassing for you, you can always try the letter/card route. I hope that I could help and I wish you luck.

It sounds like he is aware at some level that you fancy him, but perhaps isn't as aware of his own feelings. He may be freaking out a bit inside and would rather keep things on a friendship level, at least for the moment.

My advice would be to keep him as a friend and leave it at that, He does not sound mature enough for a relationship.

Here's what you'll wanna do if you expect to get anywhere:
Be blunt. Ridiculously blunt. It may feel stupid, but if you want to hug him, say "I've been wanting to hug you. Can I hug you?", or perhaps he might be more comfortable if you ask "would you hug me?", to which he might say "yes" and do nothing, to which you may have to prompt him with a "please do". Be blunt and literal. The worst thing that could happen is he might say "no", and then at least you'll know.
This is just an example, of course, but my point is that for him to know what you're thinking, you may have to tell him exactly what you're thinking. For him to know what you want, you may have to tell him exactly, word for word, what it is that you want. Chances are he just doesn't feel comfortable making assumptions, no matter how likely he is to be right.

FYI I get asked if I'm feeling nervous/uncomfortable/emotion x all the time when I'm not feeling that at all. If he approaches you and talks to you I would imagine he feels pretty comfortable around you.

But if a girl is to blunt about pursueing, doesn't that make her unattractive for many men? I know it's a stereotype but it is quite prevalent. I'd be scared of scaring the guy off!

I'd think an aspie guy would be MORE likely to be 'scared off' by bluntness than a NT.