A cosmic joke

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Joined: 24 Aug 2006
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30 Jun 2009, 7:51 am

My dating life has been disastrous without exception, yet I try to be optimistic and keep trying. A friend of mine got me in touch with a girl he knew that he was sure we'd hit it off together. We meet for lunch, she's beautiful and intellegent and awesome and I ask her to dinner and a movie. She replies there's been misunderstanding (GODAMMIT) and she's in a relationship. She thought it was a professional meeting (we're both in doc production work). Am I nuts here? When a friend connects a guy and a girl, that's a date right? Or at least a prelude to a date. No mention of "THis is profesional," or she's in a relationship." No warning, and I wind up making a goddamn fool of myself again, and find my hopes dashed. I officially quit dating. F*ck women, f*ck dating, f*ck companionship. I hereby devote my life to important work, to my ambitions. I resolve to use my inherent abilities as an aspie to do great things. I leave perpetuation of the species to the NT mouthbreathers. Everyone out there who is feeling discouraged: follow your passion, and to hell with wasting time on worthless pursuits. We're called to a higher purpose!

BR

Hector
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30 Jun 2009, 7:58 am

So he made a mistake, everyone makes mistakes.

CerebralDreamer
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30 Jun 2009, 8:13 am

My advice? Take a time out, and hit yourself in the head a few times for being an idiot. It's obvious you're trying to take an NT approach to the whole social skills situation. Go to the local library, get some textbooks on sociology and psychology, written for academic professionals, and start reading. Start pulling up research on human behavior done over the last few years, and start reading.

Trying to learn behavior the way NTs do would be like expecting them to learn how to act from a book. Not happening, if you ask me. So, hit yourself a few times if you've been trying the NT approach, and go get some books. Just be sure to avoid the trash self-help section and go for the professional writings.

Silvervarg
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30 Jun 2009, 1:19 pm

Brianruns10 wrote:

Don't feel stupid, it's not you fault, your friend messed it up by not delivering adequate information to either you or her (or both). Your response on the situation from the view you had was the logical one.
Or she might just have been an aspie herself and (as the tradition is) ran off.

And I'm sure deep down she was flattered.

Just remember that we need to spread our genes too if the future humans are going to have the benefit of our presence.

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Sing songs. Songs sung. Samsung.

DavidK
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30 Jun 2009, 2:13 pm

It could be the friend's fault in two ways. Maybe he intended it as a date and didn't let the girl know this, or he intended it as professional and didn't let you know this. Or maybe the 'relationship' was an excuse and she just didn't want to date you.

JohnHopkins
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01 Jul 2009, 10:55 am

DavidK wrote:

These are all good points.

Diamond_Head
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04 Jul 2009, 4:46 am

Quote:

Am I nuts here? When a friend connects a guy and a girl, that's a date right? Or at least a prelude to a date. No mention of "THis is profesional," or she's in a relationship." No warning, and I wind up making a goddamn fool of myself again, and find my hopes dashed.

Without a doubt man, you got jerked around. A friend setting you up with a girl you don't know would make any man think that it's a blind date. I can't recall the last time I knew any guy that set up another man on a "blind professional meeting" with a girl.

Your friend probably just made an innocent mistake, unless you think he's the type of person to pull that type of thing as a prank. I've known one or two guys with twisted senses of humor who have done similar things to other guys as a prank. No clue who would find that type of thing funny though.

Wombat
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04 Jul 2009, 5:33 am

Here are the facts:

If you are a "nice guy" or a "nice girl" who wants to love and be loved then there IS someone for you.

How to meet them? Well, that is another matter.

Cyberman
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04 Jul 2009, 2:50 pm

Brianruns10 wrote:

I hereby devote my life to important work, to my ambitions. I resolve to use my inherent abilities as an aspie to do great things.

That is a wise decision. If you can't succeed in one area, you just have to move on and try something else.

Brianruns10 wrote:

I leave perpetuation of the species to the NT mouthbreathers.

My theory about why mankind has always been full of idiots... it's because idiots are the ones who reproduce the most. Sounds like your friend might be one of them.

CerebralDreamer wrote:

My advice? Take a time out, and hit yourself in the head a few times for being an idiot. It's obvious you're trying to take an NT approach to the whole social skills situation.

I don't know where you get the idea that Brianruns10 is an "idiot trying to learn things the NT way." I think he was just trying to date.

Wombat wrote:

Here are the facts:

If you are a "nice guy" or a "nice girl" who wants to love and be loved then there IS someone for you.

How do you know that is a "fact"? What evidence do you have?

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