I may have a new girlfriend soon. question about sex though.

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Ok. so i may start going out with this person ive known for a few years. we are really close. and we have almost gone out before a few times. but the thing is. i dont need sex in a relationship. well at least it is not a primary at all for me. and i really like the person. its close to a love more likely. and she has had alot of bad relationships in the past. and has just recently become a christian (i am an athiest) and she had said before that she is not sure about sex. and i was wondering if when i am in the relationship if this does happen. how do i go about it so that i dont mess things up or make myself seem more socially awkward then i already am i mean i have had sex before but it was mainly like a one time thing nothing important with people or in 2 previous relationships i had that we broke up because i was to weird. idk if this is making much sense but if it does please respond.

Since you have no drive for sex and she doesn't seem particularly inclined to push the issue, and may in fact prefer not to do so, why not simply wait? It doesn't seem like it needs to be a problem yet. You might as well establish your relationship and less intimate forms of physical contact firmly before ever addressing the messy sex question.

Abstain, she's a Christian she's suppose to anyways. You shouldn't feel you have to have sex because of it being a "Social Norm." Thats why we have unplanned pregnancies and out of control epidemic of STDs. And I've noticed an upward trend though in promoting abstaining regardless of a person religious affiliation. You take it slow, enjoy her, don't stress regarding sex. Just enjoy the ride. When you are both ready it will happen naturally. No pressure should happen in this area.

To be honest I think in this situation that your Religious differences have more potential to mess things up than sex does. It isn't a big thing for you, and being newly "born again", she may feel hesitant to have sex anyway. Especially in light of having had bad relationships in the past. So just don't rush things (which is sounds like you wouldn't anyway) and everything should at the very least be... not terribly messy.

Sorry it doesn't sound more positive, it is just that I've seen Religion cause issues fairly often.

k i will wait. you guys are right it sounds like the best thing to do

but in response to chaotik i do have sex drive i just dont need to have sex to survive.

and also morbid you are right that our religious differences may get in the way i just have to see what hapens

Why on earth is sex such a big issue? Have it or don't. It's not like you'll rip the fabric of space either way...

If you don't think sex is that big an issue, and she's wanting to abstain, there shouldn't be a problem. It may be a problem later... but for now just enjoy the fact that it won't come along and complicate things.

I'm a Christian, and I agree that the religious differences may be more of a problem. When I first became Christian my atheist husband was horrified... I remember him saying I'd gone over to the dark side! My advice on that issue would be simply, be patient with her, don't get angry, or railroaded into anything you're not comfortable with. At some point hopefully she'll be comfortable enough with her faith not to spend every minute trying to convert you. So long as you respect her faith, and she respects your beliefs, things should work out fine.This could work out. The key to any relationship is respect.

You're only 16, and she has made a point of saying she wants to wait, and you're technically not even in the relationship yet so don't worry!.