Need girl advise

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I am currently friends with a girl that I met in college last semester and I really like her and I think we would be perfect for each other but its just not working out. She told me herself that she isn't in a rush to get a boyfriend in an unrelated conversation. I keep trying to get closer to her, but she just treats me like a friend. Not a particularly close friend, but a friend. She doesn't know that I like her to the best of my knowledge, and she has high-functioning autism to make things more confusing. I just wish I could just tell her and get this over with but we do so many things together and when schools in session we see each other several times a week. I'm afraid telling her this will ruin everything. I want to try to get over her and get to know some other girls, but she is the only girl I want to be with. What should I do: straight up tell her, keep giving suttle hints (which probably won't work because I'm not good at that and since she's also on the autism spectrum she might have problems picking it up) or just try to force myself to give up on her.

"isn't in a rush to get a boyfriend" means not interested.

I'm the kinda guy who, if you want something from me, you have to spell it out. My woman is NT, so when she tries to tell me something I usually find some nitpicky detail that makes what she says contradictory. It's perhaps better for most aspies/auties to simply be direct without being cruel.

The way I see it, you really have two options, and it doesn't really matter that much what you do. Be direct, tell her up front that you dig her, and see what happens.

I once did that with a girl I was totally into, but she'd completely ignored me. It didn't mess up things, though. She just laughed and said that it would seem to much like she was with her brother. Talk about a kick in the b411z. But it wasn't weird after that or anything. You might find the same thing happens with this girl, so if she's on the spectrum she might actually be into it, but if she isn't it's possible she'll just forget about it.

The other option is simply forget about it.

Get her alone a few times to break down some barriers before you make any kind of move. Don't CALL it a date, but see if you can get her interested in movies or some other activity you both enjoy. A lot of aspies/auties dislike physical contact, but some kind of contact normally works if you're "testing the waters," like just a light touch on the shoulder, hugs at the end of the evening, stuff like that. See how comfortable you can get her to be around you. Break down all the barriers and then ask questions. It could be you end up just "close friends," not "technically" boyfriend and girlfriend, but basically the same thing without any stated commitment. If things are really going well, then you might find yourself in a tight relationship.

Good luck. Keep us posted on how things are going!

If you have so far acted like a friend, then she will think of you as a friend. Simple as that.

At this stage, the only thing that will make her realise that you want more than that is if you straight out tell her. Don't be surprised if she doesn't take it well though; most girls would feel slightly betrayed that you had an ulterior motive all along, and since she's already said she doesn't want a relationship, then that's your answer, regardless of what you want.

Since she has autism, she may not be aware that you fancy her, but a lot of NT girls are aware of their males friends fancying them, and are happy to keep it that way.