Should I ask her out? How to do it?

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Xenu
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26 Jul 2010, 2:15 pm

So there is a girl at my High School I have been somewhat interested in for some time. Up until about last week I had never talked to her and I don't think she knew I existed. I noticed about 3-4 weeks ago how on Facebook we had several mutual friends and I thought it would be a good excuse to add her. I did and she accepted the request. So for about 2-3 weeks I hadn't talked to her at all even though she was on my friends list because I didn't know what to say and didn't really know much about her other than that we had very similar music and movie tastes. I decided one day to make my Facebook status "YEW DUN GOOFED" based on an internet joke and community and posted "The Consequences Will Never Be The Same" which was part of the same joke and I realized we had a shared interest in humor and we started talking a lot in brief situation through status comments and such. I then did this survey thing on my Notes thing (the kind of surveys you do in Myspace Bulletins) and tagged her in it. About an hour later she did the same survey and actually used alot of the same answers I did and I post "Deja Vu lol" and she said just responded ":)". She then went to my photos and commented on quite a few of them. I have a belief she is interested in me slightly and plan on asking her out but I need to know how I should do it. We have not spoken in real as of yet only through Facebook. And school is starting back in about 2 weeks and want to try and talk to her ask her out or something before then. I believe she is an NT but she seems slightly Anti Social but nothing else that makes me think she isn't an NT than being kind of Shy and Differentish.

But also I am wondering if it would be right to go out with her as she is the same age as my sister. I mean I know that doesn't really mean much in High School as I am going to be a senior and she a Sophmore but just a fleeting thought in my mind thinks something may be wrong with that.

Anyways any help you guys can give would be helpful.



SaNcheNuSS
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26 Jul 2010, 2:31 pm

Theres nothing wrong with a senior dating a sophomore. Just send her a message on face book asking if she would like to go see a movie with you. If she says yes then you will need to be more assertive with her than you are on here but that is a later discussion. Don't wait, just get it over with and ask her. If you really want to get some balls, you can call her up on the telephone and ask her. That would be better and it would show more confidence but it wouldn't kill you if you asked her out through text.



Xenu
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26 Jul 2010, 2:35 pm

SaNcheNuSS wrote:
Theres nothing wrong with a senior dating a sophomore. Just send her a message on face book asking if she would like to go see a movie with you. If she says yes then you will need to be more assertive with her than you are on here but that is a later discussion. Don't wait, just get it over with and ask her. If you really want to get some balls, you can call her up on the telephone and ask her. That would be better and it would show more confidence but it wouldn't kill you if you asked her out through text.


Well I don't have a phone ATM and I don't have her number. I guess I could ask her on Facebook... But is it appropriate to just ask someone out like that? Should I try and initiate more conversation with her before I do it?



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26 Jul 2010, 2:36 pm

Blurt it out and ask her. What is the worst she would say?


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Northeastern292
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26 Jul 2010, 2:40 pm

Xenu wrote:
So there is a girl at my High School I have been somewhat interested in for some time. Up until about last week I had never talked to her and I don't think she knew I existed. I noticed about 3-4 weeks ago how on Facebook we had several mutual friends and I thought it would be a good excuse to add her. I did and she accepted the request. So for about 2-3 weeks I hadn't talked to her at all even though she was on my friends list because I didn't know what to say and didn't really know much about her other than that we had very similar music and movie tastes. I decided one day to make my Facebook status "YEW DUN GOOFED" based on an internet joke and community and posted "The Consequences Will Never Be The Same" which was part of the same joke and I realized we had a shared interest in humor and we started talking a lot in brief situation through status comments and such. I then did this survey thing on my Notes thing (the kind of surveys you do in Myspace Bulletins) and tagged her in it. About an hour later she did the same survey and actually used alot of the same answers I did and I post "Deja Vu lol" and she said just responded ":)". She then went to my photos and commented on quite a few of them. I have a belief she is interested in me slightly and plan on asking her out but I need to know how I should do it. We have not spoken in real as of yet only through Facebook. And school is starting back in about 2 weeks and want to try and talk to her ask her out or something before then. I believe she is an NT but she seems slightly Anti Social but nothing else that makes me think she isn't an NT than being kind of Shy and Differentish.

But also I am wondering if it would be right to go out with her as she is the same age as my sister. I mean I know that doesn't really mean much in High School as I am going to be a senior and she a Sophmore but just a fleeting thought in my mind thinks something may be wrong with that.

Anyways any help you guys can give would be helpful.


A) I see nothing wrong with a senior and a sophomore dating. None at all.
B) Do get to know her first. If you like her, don't come off so strong. When you do ask her out for the first time, make it something really casual. Dinner dates are in some ways overkill in this situation.
C) Try IM'ing (preferably through Skype or AIM).

Heck, I recently dated (sort of) a girl my younger brother's age (and that's a two and a half year age difference right there).



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26 Jul 2010, 2:46 pm

I'd just send her a message asking her if she'd like to see a movie and maybe get something to eat before or after.



Xenu
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26 Jul 2010, 3:54 pm

Chronos wrote:
I'd just send her a message asking her if she'd like to see a movie and maybe get something to eat before or after.


Well I think that is a little too strong and seems like something that happens in movies which are unrealistic.... I am just thinking something casual but idk what to propose...



SaNcheNuSS
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26 Jul 2010, 4:08 pm

Xenu wrote:
SaNcheNuSS wrote:
Theres nothing wrong with a senior dating a sophomore. Just send her a message on face book asking if she would like to go see a movie with you. If she says yes then you will need to be more assertive with her than you are on here but that is a later discussion. Don't wait, just get it over with and ask her. If you really want to get some balls, you can call her up on the telephone and ask her. That would be better and it would show more confidence but it wouldn't kill you if you asked her out through text.


Well I don't have a phone ATM and I don't have her number. I guess I could ask her on Facebook... But is it appropriate to just ask someone out like that? Should I try and initiate more conversation with her before I do it?


It is more than appropriate. In fact it maybe too appropriate in this day and age. If you try "initiating more of a conversation" over facebook, then she is going to eventually get bored. You need to initiate more of a conversation in public with her. That is when you need to really find out about her. Now, you need to ask her out. Make your intentions known. IF she turns you down, which I doubt very seriously that she will from what you told me, then it is her loss, not yours. She doesn't deserve you. So go for it man, I have a feeling that she will go with you.



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26 Jul 2010, 4:23 pm

I agree. Tell her you'd like to go out for...maybe lunch or coffee? For some reason, daytime "dates" are seen as being more casual than nighttime ones.


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Xenu
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26 Jul 2010, 7:30 pm

Ah... So good news. and bad news... I asked my NT friend about it and sent him some of our conversations and apparently she is blatantly hitting on me like he said it would be obvious to anybody... and I haven't realized that. And so now I have even more pressure to ask her out sooner so she doesn't lose interest or get annoyed. Got to think of something fast... Should I ask her to hang out? Ask her to a movie? Ask her if she wants to go to the local Mall or electronics store?... I have never been good with that kind of thing... As my only successful relationship ended with the girl stalking me...



conundrum
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26 Jul 2010, 7:58 pm

Just ask her to hang out. As for where, ask her if there's any place in particular she'd like to go.

Maybe just take a walk together.


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imbatshitcrazy
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26 Jul 2010, 8:16 pm

@Xenu: I would help you, i'm just worse than you at this sorta thing :( Good Luck.



Xenu
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26 Jul 2010, 8:24 pm

Okay so I haven't asked her out yet but I want to know I just did was a good idea. We were talking about Music and she responded with this

*removing her name* I completely agree! :D
You. Are amazing. :D
about an hour ago · Like

And I just read that and responded with

*removing my name* Ah thanks lol. You're pretty awesome yourself =)
2 seconds ago · Like ·

Was that a good thing to do... Or was it creepy... I am really worried about this now.



conundrum
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26 Jul 2010, 9:10 pm

That wasn't creepy...that was sweet. :)


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imbatshitcrazy
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26 Jul 2010, 9:12 pm

@Xenu: don't be too paranoid. you'll wind up like me. just take deep breaths



SaNcheNuSS
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26 Jul 2010, 9:51 pm

Xenu wrote:
Okay so I haven't asked her out yet but I want to know I just did was a good idea. We were talking about Music and she responded with this

*removing her name* I completely agree! :D
You. Are amazing. :D
about an hour ago · Like

And I just read that and responded with

*removing my name* Ah thanks lol. You're pretty awesome yourself =)
2 seconds ago · Like ·

Was that a good thing to do... Or was it creepy... I am really worried about this now.


Is that creepy? Are you joking with us? No, It's not creepy. You are putting too much pressure on yourself. Don't get yourself worked up. Just ask her to a movie already. I promise that she will say yes but you must hurry up and ask her.