girl ignoring me!

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after i asked this girl named aimee deal to the movie , she said that she could not because she had to watch her cousins but she would go next week. then the next time in school when i had her in me art class we usually sit together and talk alot and she even gave me a valintine sucker on of couse valentines day. but after i had asked her out she never has sat by me or talked to me in class, and yes i do go up and say hi to her and she says hi back. but i just dont understand why girls would ignore me after i just asked them out on a simple date. maybe some of you girls or guys could answer this question.

Well that sounds familiar.

Not that I have any particular insight into why save for that she's 'crazy'. Maybe she has complicated feelings. Maybe she's confused. Maybe she's scared. Maybe she just likes making you dance for her entertainment.

I'm tempted to say turn things around, and tell her that if she really is interested that she's going to have to ask you out, because she's too complicated to figure out.


It's also entirely possible that you're just wasting your time on her for any of a varity of reasons.

And if she's acting like this before the relationship even starts, you might be better off looking elsewhere.

let me be cruel but honest : she doesn't like u .

When a girl likes a guy ..she wuld say "YES YES I go out with u" for no time .

It'd be nice if it was that simple.
But it isn't. People are insane.

Though by the sounds of things, that's the most likely possibility.

In female-speak, that usually means, "I like you as a friend and was fine with that but am now aware that that's not what you wanted from our relationship and can thus no longer interact comfortably with you."

It probably means she likes you as a friend, but isn't interested in dating you, and is concerned that having acted the way she did before -- talking so much with you, showing friendly affection -- was taken as romantic interest. And if it were taken that way before, she assumes it will continue to be taken that way, because she hasn't actually told you otherwise, and probably doesn't want to.

If that's what's going on, it's really not fair for her to refrain from telling you, but unfortunately that's sometimes what ends up happening, because hurting people's feelings when they're a friend is unpleasant. :/

I was going to ask the same question. It happened to me 3 times before. In one case, I am certain the girl that I asked out (does not speak to me anymore) had Asperger's herself (I knew her very well).

I think that…an Aspie female who is lonely and wants friends, could be end up giving a male a false impression that they want a relationship, when they dearly want friendship, that they lack. And when a male exhibits a romantic interest because they misread the situation, the Aspie female could get very confused and worried. They won’t understand the reason for the males romantic interest, all they were doing was trying to be friends. And because they are not socially skilled, they may ignore and run away from this confusing social situation, and not knowing what to do they will ignore him as a threat.

Also, they may not realise that ignoring someone is emotionally hurtful and they may have no friends to ask for help and in their isolation they may build-up a very black and white view of men, from stories in the news or in books. Also, Aspies tend to gravitate to each other, with their tendency for obsessivness, poor body language awarness and lack of awareness of each others emotion…the potential for a social disaster could be doubled.

Well anyway, I think that Aspie females maybe more likely to be, or feel that they, are being stalked…compared to the socially skilled…do others agree?

Forget her, find a hotter girl who actually likes you, than flaunt it in her face. This will piss her off.

Good advice.

LePetitPrince is right. If she liked you she would have wanted to go out. People are complicated but its easiest if you find someone who really really likes you and is hotter than this other girl.

Yeah! Hurting other people's feelings to "get back at them" for a perceived insult is a totally reasonable and mature way to handle the situation. After all, she's not a person or anything, just a mannequin with a specified level of hotness. Might as well forget friendship and just spring for the newer, upgraded model. -_-;

And, yeah, Diamonddavej, I would be inclined to agree with you, but I wouldn't limit it to aspie females. Most girls haven't figured out how to read guys at that age; we don't have a monopoly on social confusion in the teen dating arena.

you seem angry. If she wants to get jealous or pissed off that is her decision. I'm guessing my post pissed you off because you're a female, but to be honest girls do stuff like this to people constantly except ten times worse so I don't see the harm in enjoying pissing off a girl who spurned you. Besides, pissing people off is fun in general, that's why I do it.

I guess it's just that my reaction to, "God, I hate it when people act like that!" isn't, "All right! So I'll do it myself!" I'm not angry, but I do find it kind of annoying.

SOME girls do crap like that. Not all women are like that. Maybe she doesn't want to date him, and would rather be friends. It's not a reason to be a jerk to her. *shrugs* The whole, "You don't want to date me, therefore you're a b***h," attitude is just...really juvenile. Guys -- and aspie guys in particular -- are not exactly known for being verbose about what they're feeling, and expect women to be accepting of that fact...which is fine, so long as they're willing to extend similar consideration.

Ok, now THAT pisses me off. I'll agree that if a girl doesnt want to date a guy, the guy should just let it go. BUT, if she showed any kind of intrest like getting the guy a valentine, it can be misleading. Furthermore, it has been her decision since he asked her out to IGNORE HIM. It hasnt been, "hey, I think of you as a friend more". NOT TO MENTION, she's IGNORING HIM. The reason he liked her is that she made him feel welcome most likely(not just her looks). Then he made a move and she put distance between them. Thats BS to me. Its happened to me a couple times too, and frankly, when a girl has told me she'd rather be friends, I've let it go and tried to just be friends. USUALLY, its the girl who decides that she can't be my friend anymore because I wanted more. That causes more hurt to a guy than just being rejected. This was a friend we connected to and felt more could come from. Now we dont even have that friendship anymore. I dont know how good you are with people but when you dont neccessarily have that many friends to begin with, it hurts more to lose that one good friend you could talk to then if she was just a girl that rejected us.

From time to time Space you have good advice.