How do you know your orientation?

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DandelionFireworks
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13 Oct 2010, 2:54 am

I'm confused. How do you know whether you like anyone and if so which gender?


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13 Oct 2010, 2:58 am

DandelionFireworks wrote:
I'm confused. How do you know whether you like anyone and if so which gender?


It's tough, but you just do. It's up to you to know whether what you feel for someone is due to a romantic attraction.

I'm bi, and when I was younger, I always thought I was straight, but when I got older, even though I never kissed girls, I knew that there were some that I liked.


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squonk
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13 Oct 2010, 3:38 am

I am bisexual and knew from a very early age, of the attraction obviously, the mechanics came later. I'm very insular and don't ever have relationships but like most other people I like the sensuality. I don't like my orientation because it doesn't fit in with a world that simply expects you to be attracted to the opposite sex. I hide away and so in that sense, I guess I am dishonest about my sexuality.



Last edited by squonk on 14 Oct 2010, 3:34 am, edited 1 time in total.

sunshower
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13 Oct 2010, 5:35 am

In some cases people are very certain, in others I think there can be confusion.

Personally, I think I'm straight but sometimes I wonder if I'm bi. It's hard to know where to draw the line, because sexuality is a spectrum, not clearly defined boxes.


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Apple_in_my_Eye
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13 Oct 2010, 5:53 am

I had a crush on a guy, but it was completely non-"carnal." I wanted him to make out with me and such, but not sex. I've never been sure what to call that. If a guy I liked was asexual I could see having a boyfriend. As far as women, at puberty the standard reproductive urges and a drive to engage in them happened, though the more overwhelming drive was relational/romantic (and sappy).



sunshower
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13 Oct 2010, 6:00 am

Apple_in_my_Eye wrote:
I had a crush on a guy, but it was completely non-"carnal." I wanted him to make out with me and such, but not sex. I've never been sure what to call that.


Similar for me but with girls, except I'm not sure I'd even go so far as the make-out part, maybe just cuddling, but it was more "crush-like" than general friendship feelings. There stems my confusion as to whether I'm bi or straight, but I generally go with straight because those feelings barely extended to enough sexual desire.


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emlion
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13 Oct 2010, 6:36 am

Sleep with boys and girls.
See who turns you on.
For me; girls did not.



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13 Oct 2010, 8:02 am

Sexual attraction is chemical. Emotional attraction is subjective. If there's confusion, then one would need to determine for themselves if the attraction is sexual or emotional, or both.


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MONKEY
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13 Oct 2010, 9:58 am

I'm attracted to whoever I find attractive I guess, god knows what orientation I am, I say straight to avoid complicated explanations but it's not so simple.


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Asp-Z
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13 Oct 2010, 10:57 am

Look at some hot girls then look at some hot guys and compare your reactions I guess :P



leeloodallas
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13 Oct 2010, 3:45 pm

I guess I just always knew. When I was a kid I'd like boys a lot and never thought about the possibility of being lesbian or bi until I learned what those meant as a teen. Ultimately, when I do I only want to have sex with men and can't really see myself with a woman. I have had attractions or "crushes" on some female celebs but I think it was more that they were the ideal type of female I wish I was.

Being gay or bi would probably make my life easier though lol, as I think I've attracted more girls than boys in my lifetime.



DandelionFireworks
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14 Oct 2010, 2:49 pm

emlion wrote:
Sleep with boys and girls.
See who turns you on.
For me; girls did not.


So, how do I determine it if I would rather not sleep with anyone at all?


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emlion
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14 Oct 2010, 3:06 pm

DandelionFireworks wrote:
emlion wrote:
Sleep with boys and girls.
See who turns you on.
For me; girls did not.


So, how do I determine it if I would rather not sleep with anyone at all?


Kiss/look at/think about/jerk off to. Whatever.
But one/both/none will turn you on - the determine the attraction from that.



pineapple
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14 Oct 2010, 3:48 pm

If you don't want to have sex with people of any gender...you might be asexual. And I don't just say this because I'm asexual myself. 8) This can be the hardest orientation to figure out, because it's harder to identify the lack of sexual attraction than the presence of it. If you haven't heard of asexuality, you might want to check out the FAQs at www.asexuality.org.



superboyian
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14 Oct 2010, 5:33 pm

I'm definitely straight for certain, I only seem to get attracted to females as it seems.


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happymusic
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14 Oct 2010, 8:44 pm

Examine your fantasies and see what creams your twinkie.