Any advice

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I'm 30 years old and never had a serious girlfriend. I dated a few girls in college but nothing ever came of it. High school I won't go into. I haven't dated much since I graduated college due to employment problems and the fact I'm still living with parents. I am still not sure I have AS, but from what I've read, it looks very likely. I've always wanted to be really close to someone, to find a companion to share my life with. I'll probably do online dating. I communicate best in writing, when I've had time to think about what I'm going to say. Beyond that I'm not sure.

I am wondering what tips there are for dating with AS. Is it even a good idea at all. The biggest problems I have are that I don't really have any interest in group socializing, (girls find it odd that I don't have a group of friends I hang out with), and that I get no read whatsoever on how a date is going (is she bored, is she into me, does she want to run away screaming, etc.).

Have you thought about moving into a large flat or shared house? That will eliminate the problem of living with parents, and you ill get to know people. And if it gets too much you can retreat to your bedroom.

Well, if I was financially able, I'd get my own apartment, but my current job is part-time and I can't afford it. Those ideas would be good, but I literally have no idea how to make the social connections necessary for the things you mention.

I don't think most women care if a guy lives with his parents in this economy. The important thing is, if you were to move out with a girl, do you know what it takes to keep a house clean and orderly? I find a lot of adults who've lived at home all of their lives don't, because their parents tend to that stuff, and are quite surprised to find that baseboards need dusting.

As to is it a good idea to date with AS? It's not an inherently bad idea. There are plenty of people with AS who date, marry, and start families.

I wouldn't worry about girls finding it odd that you don't have a group of friends.

Well, my best friend got divorced and moved back in with his parents and then had a girl go after him, and she has a kid no less, so I'm guessing that I may have been biased by my conservative upbringing with regards to that. On the subject of keeping a house, yes, I do that sort of stuff. I share household chores with my parents (much more than when I was a kid). I do my own laundry (my parents would do it but I feel weird having mom do my laundry). I'm not a neat freak and my room is certainly messy (but not disgustingly so, like my brother or my uncle). I help with yardwork like lawn mowing and stuff. I also have a knack for house projects. While I was unemployed, I built a gate for the back deck, installed several ceiling fans, painted both bathrooms, and added a tile backsplash to the guest bathroom sink. On a complete tangent, never try stripping wallpaper yourself, unless you have lots of time to kill.

Women generally like men who can do handy work.

Anyway I think you should put your insecurities about living at home and not having a group of friends behind you. You're 30 and for a guy, that's still a very eligible age. I don't know the specifics of your social issues but maybe you should make some effort to put yourself out there socially...maybe not with the specific intention of finding a woman but just to get some practice with social skills. You can join some type of meet up group or something, and maybe after talking to women on a non-romantic level you might find you are eventually ready to begin seeking a girlfriend. You are only young once.

Mate you remind me of me 8-9 yrs ago (I'm 33 now)

Look up a guy called David D'angelo and download his e-books on confidence / dating etc

A lot of it in there is garbage, but there are some worthwhile points.

May not work for everyone, but in my mid-late 20's I had zero problems dating (ie nightly dates) and am now married with a kid.

So, who can say, worked for me, may not work for you.

yikes, your me in two years.

Only difference is that I just got laid-off, so I have no money coming.

Zur-Darkstar

You are entering your "prime years" as husband material.
All the "princesses" who have been screwing "bad boys" now want to settle down.

All the "career women" who know that their biological clocks are running down will want you.

All the unmarried mothers and divorced mothers will be looking for a sucker.

You are Grade A Meat.

The question is do YOU want THEM?

Do you want to marry some princess who has had a hundred lovers before you and is only "settling" on you for a meal ticket?

LOL, I don't make enough money to be anybody's meal ticket. I might in a few years depending on how the business I'm involved in goes, but I'm not counting on it. I get your point about the career women. I think with my interests and the fact traditional gender roles have no meaning to me, I could do the house husband thing too.

I wouldn't want anyone to "settle" for me, but then that's on me to find and assess that in the dating stage. Just because they've had a hundred lovers doesn't mean they were good lovers. It's a pattern that people have a lot of temporary, short-term relationships in their teens and early twenties, and that's considered normal. I can't really reasonably expect someone to be perfect, and I really wouldn't want someone that was.

I wouldn't get involved with anyone with kids because I don't want kids. They're noisy and annoying and they pick up so many bad influences in the schools, raising one decently would be like trying to fill the ocean with a bucket. I also have Crohn's disease (1 in 4 chance to pass to offspring) plus the AS, and the writing is on the wall with regards to children. I'd actually come closer to dating/marrying a girl with kids than I would having my own. I am too similar to my father and we clash constantly (to the point he's the main topic of discussion in most of my therapy sessions). I don't really want to be repeating this dynamic.

I don't think all women are as stereotypical as you make it seem, either. Those things may be true of many women, but I'd be looking for someone who, like me, doesn't fit the usual mold.