I would love to pretend I like being single.

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Yeah, it bothers me a bit.......sure I have more important things to worry about then being single, but it still gets to me. I don't feel like I really have any chance of ever finding an actual relationship. I mean I have obvious mental problems made apparent whenever I am socially interacting and I'm not just referring to the aspergers. I have chronic depression so I know I come off as depressed, I don't easily express intimate emotions, I am not too crazy about sex(would rather drink beer and listen to folk metal). And I don't think I am that terribly attractive, i don't have a job and I have no real goals.

I am aware of all that and I am not very attracted to complete stability, for some reason....the idea of ever having a steady job and being with someone who had a high paying steady job and being able to afford a house and a couple cars with no difficulty is pretty un-appealing to me. I guess i feel like I am the only person in general who is not striving for those things most people are working towards.......so the chances of finding anyone who i might have a connection with seems slim. this is kind of a useless thread, but this was just on my mind and i felt like posting it.

I'm sure that's not true, everyone has a chance (sorry, I know that sounds horribly patronising!) I'm a guy, and I can tell you, I don't like the thought of just being with a girl who wants the nuclear family and nothing else, and even with someone with few goals, I'm not judging a girl on what they're aiming for

I've met a fair few girls who have chronic depression, and I've managed to get on quite well with them, I'm sure you'll meet someone you have a connection with, it's just a matter of time.

There's plenty of men who don't want those things either.

& Yes, you do have a chance - i'm highly unstable and abnormal too.

It bothers me now and then.

I'd love to be actually able to enjoy being single, instead of having to see what pretty much EVERYBODY ELSE already has and being the odd man out all the time...

I don't enjoy being single but I definitely enjoy it more than being in a bad relationship with someone who can't understand me and even won't try to. So I guess it's not being single that I don't like. It's being lonely that bothers me.
And I'm sure that everyone has a chance. We never know what the future holds at least that's what I keep telling myself

Join the club, I hate it.

Having a relation would be a nice thing, but it is a bit difficult to get into one. Having a date is something I done, keeping some contact also, but making it a relation is hopeless.

But when I see friends divorcing, fighting and other problem in their relationships I do not feel too unhappy.

Asp-z is right.

Intimate relationship is a need.

He was always right about this.

I use to think there was something wrong with the fact that I was always single and trust me I would rather be in a relationship with some great women. Being single isn't a bad thing and yes we all want some sort of connection to other people but being single gives you type to sort things out for yourself. I've come to enjoy the freedom and introspection it allows, I have only in the past few years become motivated in my life to actually pursue a career and finish up school work. Sadly that means that anyone that is looking to "Settle down" at this point in my life isn't someone that going to hold my interest. Unfortunately many of the girls I go out with seem to want that which ends up turning the dates or outings that I go out on into social experiments after a while.

I had an interesting conversation about this topic with my friend, hes been single and dating for quite a few years now, hes never really had any problem with meeting women. He was telling me that he really wanted to find a girl that he could call his girlfriend and that he was ready to try to settle down a bit, while I on the other hand had just gotten away from a potential bad relationship and was swearing the whole idea off. Long story short we come to the conclusion that if you go out into the social scene LOOKING for something your going to have a much harder time finding it then if you just kinda let it happen.

Not being attracted to stability isn't a bad thing, stability is boring. Some people love to travel and never establish a permanent place of residency. "Home is where you rest your head at night", it's not conventional but your not the only person who see that as a good way to live, not by a long shot.

But to be honest I think your equation being lonely and depressed with being single. Trust me they different animals completely that require different means to tackle. Finding another person won't change many of the problems you listed that you see in yourself, that is something you have to find the motivation to do on your own. I know it's hard but it can be done, you just gotta look into yourself and find that spark that makes you tick.

I hate being single. Maybe if I'd ever been in a relationship, I could appreciate it more, but until then, it sucks.