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How do you hit on women?

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bee33
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12 Jan 2011, 1:33 am

I think you have to go with your own style and with who you are. Pretending to be a "bad boy" if you're not one might just make you feel foolish. If you're a geology nerd who likes nice clothes, go with that. You'll find a woman who can appreciate it and your relationship will make a lot more sense. My two cents. :)



astaut
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12 Jan 2011, 1:38 am

Wombat wrote:
Grisha, you seem to have all the qualifications except the right approach.

I tell you in all seriousness to buy a thumping big motorcycle. A Harley Davidson, not a Honda.


Oooh, I wouldn't like a man with a Harley. Or rather, I wouldn't be impressed with his taste in motorcycles. But then again, I'm not much of a 'cruiser' girl 8)


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Grisha
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12 Jan 2011, 2:06 am

wefunction wrote:
Back when my husband and I were dating, we had a casual date set up. He wore black harley davidson boots, button-fly blue jeans, an Orange County Choppers Fire Bike t-shirt (from that TLC show where the family makes all those custom motorcycles) and a black and silver grommet belt. He had a goatee and his short hair was styled back. He was friggin' hot. Totally took my breath away.

So take Wombat's suggestion (it's an awesome suggestion) and make it your own. You ought to do well.


Just in case, I wanted to say that I wasn't trying to brag about my wardrobe or anything, it's just that people always say that you should improve your wardrobe, and since it's something I have control over, I probably way overdo it hoping that it will compensate for my shortcomings, that's the point I was trying to make.

I'd say that probably 99%+ of women swoon over the "tough guy" (who's nevertheless really sensitive of course) like you do.

But it's just not me.

It's not to say I'm a wimp, I can, and will, rip someone's lungs out through their nose if I need to protect someone I care about and it would be a serious mistake to think otherwise.

But I'm just not the average slick goatee-wearing Harley dude that i see getting all the girls - I need to find that 1%



DW_a_mom
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12 Jan 2011, 2:15 am

Grisha wrote:
wefunction wrote:
Back when my husband and I were dating, we had a casual date set up. He wore black harley davidson boots, button-fly blue jeans, an Orange County Choppers Fire Bike t-shirt (from that TLC show where the family makes all those custom motorcycles) and a black and silver grommet belt. He had a goatee and his short hair was styled back. He was friggin' hot. Totally took my breath away.

So take Wombat's suggestion (it's an awesome suggestion) and make it your own. You ought to do well.


Just in case, I wanted to say that I wasn't trying to brag about my wardrobe or anything, it's just that people always say that you should improve your wardrobe, and since it's something I have control over, I probably way overdo it hoping that it will compensate for my shortcomings, that's the point I was trying to make.

I'd say that probably 99%+ of women swoon over the "tough guy" (who's nevertheless really sensitive of course) like you do.

But it's just not me.

It's not to say I'm a wimp, I can, and will, rip someone's lungs out through their nose if I need to protect someone I care about and it would be a serious mistake to think otherwise.

But I'm just not the average slick goatee-wearing Harley dude that i see getting all the girls - I need to find that 1%


The problem with over-doing it is that I think seeing or knowing about the overly-perfect wardrobe is doing to scare off a lot of women. In dating, anything outside of the range of common experience tends to be a bit scary.

Sorry, haven't read the rest of the thread; just jumped to the end. I find the wardrobe focus intriguing but if I looked at that cold as a woman evaluating a potential date, and having no understanding of AS, I'd be really questioning what it was telling me about you and my ability to relate to you.


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DW_a_mom
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12 Jan 2011, 2:19 am

Grisha wrote:
Wombat wrote:
Grisha, you seem to have all the qualifications except the right approach.

I tell you in all seriousness to buy a thumping big motorcycle. A Harley Davidson, not a Honda.

Then swagger into bars and parties and clubs wearing jack boots, leather pants and a leather jacket.
Stand in the corner and sneer at everyone like you were Elvis or James Dean or Clint Eastwood.

Girls go crazy for "bad boys" and when they find out that you are a bad boy with money and intelligence as well, you will have to beat them off with a stick.


I agree with the "bad boy" thing, but in the scenario you described I'd look like one of the "Village People" :lol:


And trying to be anything but who you are always backfires.


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Grisha
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12 Jan 2011, 3:19 am

Quote:
The problem with over-doing it is that I think seeing or knowing about the overly-perfect wardrobe is doing to scare off a lot of women. In dating, anything outside of the range of common experience tends to be a bit scary.

Sorry, haven't read the rest of the thread; just jumped to the end. I find the wardrobe focus intriguing but if I looked at that cold as a woman evaluating a potential date, and having no understanding of AS, I'd be really questioning what it was telling me about you and my ability to relate to you.


How so? Not sure what you mean, that a women could come to my apartment and run away screaming when she opens my closet? :wink:

But I guess the motivation behind it (desperation) could be a "red flag"...

On a similar subject, I've also got a a well-equipped free weight gym in my living room for the same reason - I obsess over my bench press/abs/etc thinking that It might cause someone to like me.

Pretty pathetic now that I think about it, but it really helps me cope by giving me hope that someday I'll be worth loving.

God, what a f*cking mess... :oops: