Best friend confessed his attraction for me. Ick. Help?

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You ARE NOT at fault. This happens to all kinds of people, men and women, girls and boys, AS and NT. However, keeping yourself safe should be your first priority, do whatever you need to do right now to make sure that's happening.

I am on the other side of the world from you right now, and I don't know you - I wish I could help you, but you're going to have to rally and find a way to help yourself - and you can do this. First of all, there's a list of phone numbers for agencies you can call here: http://www.gvawp.org.uk/ Many of them will talk you through your current situation, and make sure you are kept safe.

Don't hurt yourself or let yourself get hurt. From other posts, it seems like your life is going well right now - this is just a hiccup, something you can handle and move on. I have confidence that you can handle it - I just want to make sure you don't gloss over it and pretend like it's nothing - you need a plan.

Please post back and let us know you are OK.

i flip like this all the time. it's either perfect or i hate myself completely.
i don't trust anyone else.
i just want my boyfriend to come home.
i have bad thoughts when hes not here.

people never have confidence i can handle anything. and they're right. i just end up making things worse.

everything everyone has ever told me is right. useless, stupid, little girl.

know what scares me the most? when i talk to my friend tomorrow, he'll get angry and i'll just do nothing because if i lose him i'll have no friends. sad, lonely, useless, stupid girl.

In all honesty, upon more closely reading the full story, I think this guy does not sound like he is a friend to you. Having un-returned feelings for you = fine. Physically harming you = NOT fine.

Whether he is your only friend or not doesn't matter. Sounds harsh, but my advice would be to cut contact with him and try to make new friends. That's what I'd do, even if that person was my only friend. A friend who abuses you is not worth having. Shouting at each other if you're mad is ok, but physically harming you crosses the line.

i deserve to be hit.
i always have.

The OP has to understand that her boyfriend isn't the only male to love or be in love with her. I love a married woman, her husband isn't the only man that loves her.

It just happens. Chances are that your boyfriend isn't the one, maybe the best friend is. Just like the married woman, her husband may not be the one, I might be.

(This post is not targeted specifically at the author of the OP, but is the frustration I have with women in general.)

Typical. Give a girl the choice between someone that she knows she can trust with her life, someone who cares about her for who she is on the inside, not just her physical appearance; and someone she barely knows, but causes a temporary rush of brain chemicals that impairs her judgment. And who does she choose, every single time?
You want to know why this country has a %50 divorce rate? Because of people chasing after whoever is "hot" or "cool", and not even giving consideration to the one person who's proven to be the perfect match in every way that matters in the long term.
Statistics have proven that marriages between close friends have the highest success rate. You know that you and your best friend will likely still be close even in your old age, while you and your boyfriend will likely despise each other five years from now. Now, honestly, who do you think is the more logical choice to father your children? Many men realize this, but are always shut out by the stubborn stupidity of women in this regard.
When you do discover that your wonderful boyfriend has been cheating on you, and need a shoulder to cry on, don't be surprised if your best friend isn't available this time.
Forget about curing Autism; what the world needs most is a cure for being female.

Wow. Someone's bitter. Misogyny awaaaaaaaay!

My boyfriend would never cheat on me.
You have no right to even suggest that, you don't know me or him.

Your little rant has nothing to do with anything i've posted.
I trust my boyfriend with my life - and he's saved it on a few occasions literally where as my friend has hit me and some other things too.

Me and my boyfriend won't despise each other any time soon - he's also my best friend, he knows me inside and out, loves me for more than my blonde hair and looks.
My CARING and NON-VIOLENT boyfriend is the correct choice. In fact, there never was a choice to be made.

I just wanted to know if I should continue seeing my friend and if to share the information with my boyfriend.

Not to be be attacked as a whole on the female gender. A cure for being female? It makes me glad to be female when I see posts like that.

I'm done. I'm tired, this makes me cry. Whatever.

Just give him the night, he'll come back. Try and keep your thoughts either positive or occupied, preferably both. And you obviously handle yourself quite well, you managed to get in a relationship where others with the same difficulties have not. Don't insult yourself, you're not useless or stupid.

As for your friend, tell him if he really loves you, he'll back off a bit. I don't honestly know how to repair that friendship. On the plus side, you still have your boyfriend as a friend if you lose this other guy. :\ Otherwise I wish you the best and good luck.

Nonsense. You're just projecting instead of trying to help someone who has enough problems already. Em is in love with her boyfriend and he's in love with her, that's all that matters. This friend has been abusive to her in the past and she's vulnerable enough as it is.

Em, you're neither stupid or useless and you don't deserve to be hit. You're a lovely person and you have to remember that Stefan loves you and he'll be home soon.

I think Sunshower and momsparky offered very good advice. If I were you, I would talk this over with your boyfriend and ask for his support. He knows everybody involved and from your posts here I'm sure wants what's best for you. Trust him, he can help with this.

Try to relax a little and get some sleep if you can. These things happen, it's unpleasant but not the end of the world. You and Stefan sound like a great couple, you can get over this.

Edit - do you want me to ask for this thread to be moved in the Haven so people would stop being so insensitive and cruel?

Well, I kept my mouth shut and didn't tell the married woman that I love her.

I never told anyone this but he's hit me more than once. He scares me.

*hugs* it'll be okay. Don't pay attention to the jerks posting here. Have a good cry, let it all out. Get some tea or chocolate or whatever calms you down. Bundle up on the couch and watch a funny movie. You need some alone time now to get your head straight. If you need support, shoot me a PM or something.

You've been assaulted and are scared/intimidated by your friend. Have you reported him?

i don't even know why i post. i just sound like a whiny little b***h.
but i don't have any other friends to talk to.
i had stefan but he's not here because i pushed him away again.
and i know if i leave this i'll just self-harm because i don't know how else to cope.
i'm such a mess.

Yeeeeah. That's kind of a big deal, em. Have a restraining order in place if need be. Your safety should be your top priority. This guy obviously doesn't respect you.