Book recommendation - "The Evolution of Desire"

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Hi all,

I thought I would recommend a book that I have been reading and getting a lot of enjoyment and good info from - "The Evolution of Desire," by David M. Buss.

Why this is relevant to the group here is that it answers, with backup data, a lot of the "unsaid rules" that Aspies have a lot of frustration with in terms of what each gender looks for in the other. In fact, I think it is probably the best $10 I ever spent on a book (I bought the Kindle version), and I wish I had read it when I was a teenager -- it would have saved me a lot of heartache, and helped clarify the "big picture" for me."

For many of us, it will confirm what we already know -- women chase resources, men chase fertility (and sex). What I found fascinating was that it broke this down into specifics in a way that was both exhaustive and entertaining -- the book definitely is not dry. I think this will really help a lot of people here, and I like that the studies used as backup for the statements in the book were across cultures and eras, thus nullifying a lot of the criticism that might come from folks claiming "Oh, well, that's how it used to be, but it's different now..."

It's never different now -- the human race hasn't really changed that much, nor has society. Things have just gotten easier and faster.

And -- before the usual suspects (you know who you are) jump on here with all kinds of refutations -- save your breath and read the book first. I'm not going to reply here to this thread after this -- really, I don't have the time any more to get into spats with gadflies, and I'm only posting here to help.

So men, women, those in-between -- if you really wanted to know the true motivations with regards to mating/sex/relationships in the human race, check out the book -- you won't be disappointed. I think you too will find that it has a clarifying effect on how you perceive the world around you, and your own challenges with dating.

I love evolutionary psychology. I've read excerpts from this book (they may have been in Discover Magazine, which I read). It all boils down to the prodding we get from our DNA. His DNA wants to know, "can you get pregnant and succesfully bear my children?". Her DNA wants to know, "if I do, will you take care of them?". We are all individuals and elderly people have sex too, even though kids are a moot point then, but this does explain the broad biological forces at work.

I know everything I need to know about Evo Psych.

It has taught me that I'm pretty much a waste of space and flesh since I'm not reproducing and probably never will.

It has also taught me that life is survival of the fittest and some very sinister mechanisms are at play behind seemingly innocent, normal everyday behavior.

It has made me into a misanthrope.