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Online dating profiles are forever?

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Grisha
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24 Aug 2011, 10:52 am

I have summarily abandoned online dating, I have about 3-4 profiles on different sites and I tried to delete them, but I'm still getting spam and even replies related to them. Apparently, they leave your profile there hoping you will be enticed into coming back.

I'm sure there's some inconvenient and awkward procedure to delete it permanently which I now have to try and figure out.

Just wanted to warn you about this, it's something to consider before putting a profile up on a site just to "see what happens" - it may have a life of its own...

[/rant]



Moog
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24 Aug 2011, 10:56 am

Can you not turn off notifications?

I'd write 'not interested go away' all over my profile, and take down my pics.

or ask a mod or an admin to remove your accounts. And if that doesn't work, put something rude up in your account and then report yourself?

There's probably ways.


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Grisha
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24 Aug 2011, 11:34 am

Moog wrote:
Can you not turn off notifications?

I'd write 'not interested go away' all over my profile, and take down my pics.

or ask a mod or an admin to remove your accounts. And if that doesn't work, put something rude up in your account and then report yourself?

There's probably ways.


I can't edit my profile because it's (supposedly) been deleted, but people are still viewing and responding to it (that's how they are trying to get me back)

I'm sure there's a way to do it by contacting someone, but "delete" should mean "delete", right?



blitzkrieg
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24 Aug 2011, 11:49 am

It seems as though you have deactivated your profiles rather than having deleted them. If you can't access account options whilst it is deactivated then perhaps you should reactivate the account and look in the options again for the option to permanently delete your account. There has to be a way unless the websites are similar to how Facebook used to be where the full extent of options weren't available to non administrator users. If you tell me the websites you want to deactivate your profile at I can attempt to help you with useful links. For example this a link that tells you how to delete an OkCupid account. I can't vouch for it's validity as I don't use dating sites but it's worth following to see it if works.



Grisha
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24 Aug 2011, 11:54 am

blitzkrieg wrote:
It seems as though you have deactivated your profiles rather than having deleted them. If you can't access account options whilst it is deactivated then perhaps you should reactivate the account and look in the options again for the option to permanently delete your account. There has to be a way unless the websites are similar to how Facebook used to be where the full extent of options weren't available to non administrator users. If you tell me the websites you want to deactivate your profile at I can attempt to help you with useful links. For example this a link that tells you how to delete an OkCupid account. I can't vouch for it's validity as I don't use dating sites but it's worth following to see it if works.


Thanks for the offer, but I'm sure I'll figure out how to delete them. I should mention that only the "paid" sites seem to be this way, I got rid of my OKC profile just fine.

The other thing I realized is that many of the profiles you view yourself could be old deleted ones - I wonder what the % of these is?



blitzkrieg
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24 Aug 2011, 11:57 am

Grisha wrote:
blitzkrieg wrote:
It seems as though you have deactivated your profiles rather than having deleted them. If you can't access account options whilst it is deactivated then perhaps you should reactivate the account and look in the options again for the option to permanently delete your account. There has to be a way unless the websites are similar to how Facebook used to be where the full extent of options weren't available to non administrator users. If you tell me the websites you want to deactivate your profile at I can attempt to help you with useful links. For example this a link that tells you how to delete an OkCupid account. I can't vouch for it's validity as I don't use dating sites but it's worth following to see it if works.


Thanks for the offer, but I'm sure I'll figure out how to delete them. I should mention that only the "paid" sites seem to be this way, I got rid of my OKC profile just fine.

The other thing I realized is that many of the profiles you view yourself could be old deleted ones - I wonder what the % of these is?


Oh I see. Yes, that's an interesting thought.



Moog
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24 Aug 2011, 12:39 pm

Grisha wrote:
blitzkrieg wrote:
It seems as though you have deactivated your profiles rather than having deleted them. If you can't access account options whilst it is deactivated then perhaps you should reactivate the account and look in the options again for the option to permanently delete your account. There has to be a way unless the websites are similar to how Facebook used to be where the full extent of options weren't available to non administrator users. If you tell me the websites you want to deactivate your profile at I can attempt to help you with useful links. For example this a link that tells you how to delete an OkCupid account. I can't vouch for it's validity as I don't use dating sites but it's worth following to see it if works.


Thanks for the offer, but I'm sure I'll figure out how to delete them. I should mention that only the "paid" sites seem to be this way, I got rid of my OKC profile just fine.

The other thing I realized is that many of the profiles you view yourself could be old deleted ones - I wonder what the % of these is?


The moral of the story... never pay for anything :wink:


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Grisha
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24 Aug 2011, 12:53 pm

Moog wrote:
The moral of the story... never pay for anything :wink:


While I understand that your kidding, I have to add that I tried the paid sites because I heard almost universally that the quality of people was better there. I didn't see any difference from the "free" sites except for having more members - and it turns out that many of those "members" were actually old deleted profiles!

What a scam! :?



blitzkrieg
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24 Aug 2011, 12:56 pm

Grisha wrote:
Moog wrote:
The moral of the story... never pay for anything :wink:


While I understand that your kidding, I have to add that I tried the paid sites because I heard almost universally that the quality of people was better there. I didn't see any difference from the "free" sites except for having more members - and it turns out that many of those "members" were actually old deleted profiles!

What a scam! :?


I'd have thought people who are willing to pay to use those sites would be less likely to be 'window shoppers' than some of those on free sites. Although on those sites you miss out all of the 'unsure' people who end up dating. Personally I would never pay for something like that but at least you have experience with them and your opinion now holds more weight than others who care to comment on them. :)



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24 Aug 2011, 1:18 pm

Everything you ever post on the Internet is forever.

Everything.

As soon as something is posted online: it is copied to several data centers around the world for redundancy, it is backed up and stored indefinitely, it is mirrored by their partners, it is mirrored by archive.org, it is copied to site visitors' computers (Web browser cache) and then it exists in their backups forever, it is stolen by other users and reposted, it is almost certainly mirrored and analyzed by governments, it is copied and analyzed by advertisers, etc etc etc....

Everything on the Internet is forever.

Keep that in mind before hitting the Submit button.



Grisha
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24 Aug 2011, 1:48 pm

Dilbert wrote:
Everything you ever post on the Internet is forever.

Everything.

As soon as something is posted online: it is copied to several data centers around the world for redundancy, it is backed up and stored indefinitely, it is mirrored by their partners, it is mirrored by archive.org, it is copied to site visitors' computers (Web browser cache) and then it exists in their backups forever, it is stolen by other users and reposted, it is almost certainly mirrored and analyzed by governments, it is copied and analyzed by advertisers, etc etc etc....

Everything on the Internet is forever.

Keep that in mind before hitting the Submit button.


There's certainly nothing in my profile that I don't mind being public or I never would have posted it in the first place.

I was just wondering what would happen if your current girlfriend/wife saw one of these spams and assumed you were "on the prowl", or worse?

It's not currently an issue, but I don't want to give anyone the impression that I'm still "looking" when I'm not.



spongy
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24 Aug 2011, 1:56 pm

Grisha wrote:
blitzkrieg wrote:
It seems as though you have deactivated your profiles rather than having deleted them. If you can't access account options whilst it is deactivated then perhaps you should reactivate the account and look in the options again for the option to permanently delete your account. There has to be a way unless the websites are similar to how Facebook used to be where the full extent of options weren't available to non administrator users. If you tell me the websites you want to deactivate your profile at I can attempt to help you with useful links. For example this a link that tells you how to delete an OkCupid account. I can't vouch for it's validity as I don't use dating sites but it's worth following to see it if works.


Thanks for the offer, but I'm sure I'll figure out how to delete them. I should mention that only the "paid" sites seem to be this way, I got rid of my OKC profile just fine.

The other thing I realized is that many of the profiles you view yourself could be old deleted ones - I wonder what the % of these is?

Most pay dating sites are full of dead profiles, thats why they say they have over 15 million members(Im not making it up match claims to have them)
Heres a good article about it
http://www.womenshealthmag.com/sex-and- ... match-scam


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The_Face_of_Boo
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24 Aug 2011, 2:00 pm

If your profile is getting responses then you did a marvelous work, why disabling it?



Grisha
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24 Aug 2011, 2:07 pm

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
If your profile is getting responses then you did a marvelous work, why disabling it?


They're never from someone I would even remotely be interested in.

I just want "delete profile" to mean "delete profile" - is that too much to ask?

I don't need to see messages from "Bootylicious69" in my inbox! :?



blitzkrieg
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24 Aug 2011, 2:10 pm

Grisha wrote:
The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
If your profile is getting responses then you did a marvelous work, why disabling it?


They're never from someone I would even remotely be interested in.

I just want "delete profile" to mean "delete profile" - is that too much to ask?

I don't need to see messages from "Bootylicious69" in my inbox! :?


:lol:



DC
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24 Aug 2011, 2:10 pm

Grisha wrote:
I have summarily abandoned online dating, I have about 3-4 profiles on different sites and I tried to delete them, but I'm still getting spam and even replies related to them. Apparently, they leave your profile there hoping you will be enticed into coming back.

I'm sure there's some inconvenient and awkward procedure to delete it permanently which I now have to try and figure out.

Just wanted to warn you about this, it's something to consider before putting a profile up on a site just to "see what happens" - it may have a life of its own...

[/rant]


You can set up a filter on your email to just delete every email coming from that address. No more spam.