Has Your Date Ever Asked a Stupid Question?

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I'm not talking about questions that you have asked, but questions that that are especially presumptuous on the first date, like...

• "Are you gay?"
• "Why aren't you already married?"
• "If your ex wanted you back, would you go?"

... and so forth.

I'm also curious about the answer you've provided, like...

• "No, I'm not gay, but I don't mind if you are."
• "I was once married, but her drug habit ruined our relationship."
• "I'd not go back to my ex even if her parole officer okay'd it."

... and so forth.

So, what stupid questions have your dates asked you?

On the question of if I'm gay, I had to admit I'm bi. That didn't go down well.

On the others, it has been them telling me about their ex.

I see none of this as a problem but unfortunately they did.

My best results still remain people I have already known, therefore people who already knew me.

The bi answer was always a datekiller though. Despite that I will always answer that honestly. I value integrity over results.

I don't get why any of those are inherently stupid. I wouldn't find them particularly presumptuous either.

I ask lots of stupid questions, but I get to learn cool stuff when I ask, so it's all good.

Okay, the first one is stupid (imo) because if I weren't attracted to her as a hetero-male would be attracted to a woman, then I wouldn't have been dating her.

The second one seems presumptuous (imo) because there is the implied assumption that a man of that age (I was in my mid-30s at the time) should be married.

The third is both presumptuous and stupid (imo) because (1) if I had wanted to go back to my ex, I would have done so already, and (2) if I had still been interested in my ex, I would not have been dating others.

It makes me curious, but I can understand why women would be put off (I know that looks offensive but I don't mean it) because if their partner was going to cheat, it would be worse if it was with another man. The idea would make me feel that our love was invalid in the first place cos he preferred a man over me.

I don't think it's a good idea to tell anyone anything personal like that, or AS. You're meant to start off with small talk and work your way into deeper conversation, otherwise it scares people. Note that I never stick to this either.

That assumes that everyone goes on dates for a singular purpose. If you were gay and on a date with her, it might be because you wanted to cultivate a 'beard'.



Well, when you're not doing as average does, perhaps people are curious about that? *shrug*

People don't tend to ask me why I'm not married, perhaps it's more obvious



1. How does she know that you're the one who has the power to resurrect (or not) your previous relationship? Perhaps she left you.

2. A lot of people date even when they are in love with someone else, perhaps with the hope of finding someone else, or someone to be with in the interim. Perhaps she wanted to know if you were one of those

I've never been asked this by a date.

Although people on dating sites ask me the stupidest questions in the world.

Do tell!

Why are you single?
Why are you up so late?
Why don't you have a boyfriend?
Why have you been a member of this site for so long?

A few examples.

I'm not sure how to work the quote feature but here's the nearest I can do -

[quote]I don't think it's a good idea to tell anyone anything personal like that, or AS. You're meant to start off with small talk and work your way into deeper conversation, otherwise it scares people. Note that I never stick to this either

Maybe this isn't the way way smalltalk is supposed to work, but I am honest from the start. If others cannot be this honest with me it is most probably doomed.

It may not be the most effective way to behave, but I will behave unto others how I wish them to behave unto me. I may spend a long time single but to me it is worth it. I know I wouldn't cheat but if somebody thinks I would we probably aren't suited. There are a lot of myths attributed to bisexuality, that is not my problem.

As per usual though I am not the socially wisest and I thank you for your perspective. Maybe I should reconsider my approach but I doubt I will. Maybe I'm set in my ways or need to think more deeply.

I've grown beards before. The process involved not shaving.

Becoming gay and going on dates with women does not seem like it would produce the same effect...

http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.p ... =a%20beard

1. a beard

A women who goes on a date with a gay man to mask the fact that he is gay.
Boss asks you and your girl friend to join him and his wife for dinner, you accept. ( Boss suffers from severe homophobia ). You need a beard.


2. a beard

A woman that a homosexual male dates or marries as a cover for his true sexuallity.
Everyone knew Don was gay. His wife, Sally, was just a beard.


3. a beard

A woman who is dating a gay man and who unbeknownst to her is covering for his latent homosexuality.
"Greg doesn't really like Susan, she's just a beard."

Not one of the questions in this thread is "stupid". They all have valid reasons.

I once asked if the Jonas brothers were all from the same place... THAT'S a stupid question.

More, please? Thanx!

I agree that those questions are valid and not necessarily stupid, but stupid is subjective anyway, how questions are made as well as the reactions towards some questions seem indicators to wether the dating subject is convenient or not. That's my opinion though, not that I have to care about it, but I wouldn't like my questions seen stupid in a degorative way, given that that would be a way I'd try to start a conversation, and this is one of the reasons I rather not date.

No such thing as a stupid question. The Jonas brothers could have been born/raised in different places, for example.