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What can you do with your life if you never get a partner?
Is anything in life important if you never get a partner? 50%  50%  [ 3 ]
Why are people like me force fed couples romancing by the media and tv when we can't find a love of our own. 50%  50%  [ 3 ]
Total votes : 6

dannywilde
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05 Mar 2012, 5:12 am

I am 49 this month and I have never ever had a ladyfriend and this makes me very very depressed. When I am out and about I always see them, they seem to come out of the woodwork holding hands and kissing as if to say "I'm allright Jack, who gives a toss about you?" It seems like it will never ever change. I know that there are plenty of others with autism who are in the same boat as me but that is no comfort whatsoever. :(



Last edited by dannywilde on 05 Mar 2012, 5:23 am, edited 1 time in total.

Mummy_of_Peanut
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05 Mar 2012, 5:20 am

<< Moved from general autism discussion, by member of moderating team. >>



CrazyCatLord
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05 Mar 2012, 7:32 am

I'm in a very similar situation. I'm afraid the only thing that someone like me can do with his life is to get a cat (or two, or three).

I also recommend watching Roman Polanski's recent movie "Carnage". I saw it earlier today, and it really made me appreciate my single status. It was a real treat to watch the social dynamics between two married couples, with ever-changing alliances and conflicts. Couple against couple, men against women and vice versa, three against one. I wouldn't want to participate in this kind of relationship politics, diplomatics and power struggles. The film reminded me that there is no other half, no soul mate, no such thing as being together with someone. It might feel like that for a while if you're madly in love (I wouldn't know about that), but in the end it's just another selfish person who complicates your life, wants you to meet their unrealistic expectations, and will eventually grow tired of you.



OJani
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05 Mar 2012, 10:25 am

I'm 39 this month and have similar issues. One of my problems is that I'd like to have a child or two more than being in a relationship. This doesn't bode well, I know. I guess I've known instinctively in my whole adult life that I'd be a terrible mate if I ever got coupled. Besides not being a reliable and caring person I have sensory issues with both kissing and doing the man's job in the bed, tbh. I guess I'd pass as a parent if I had a child, I've practiced caring for and playing with other children in my family and acquaintance. The hard part would be to mate with someone who'd accept me for who I am, without trying to control or change me. Both one of my closest friends and an ASD specialist told me that they would recommend someone who'd 'wear the pants', but I really wouldn't tolerate if someone tried to control me against the policies that I acquired during my upbringing, or shortly, against my will. Even without that I'd feel so much hard-pressed that I could barely tolerate in the long run. So there's a possible antagonism that wouldn't make things easier for me.

I've given up on internet dating for the time being, and as a pathetic effort I plan to put up an ad in a local weekly women's magazine's L&D section, explicitly stating among other things that I'm mildly autistic... :?


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"Aut viam inveniam aut faciam." (Hannibal) - Latin for "I'll either find a way or make one."


Asp-Z
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05 Mar 2012, 1:55 pm

Try going to HSBC instead.

Bad joke aside, keep trying. The internet is a good place to meet people who are rarely found IRL, I wouldn't give up on it so easily.



Keeno
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05 Mar 2012, 5:20 pm

Halifax, Yorkshire?

Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada?



Asp-Z
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05 Mar 2012, 6:05 pm

Keeno wrote:
Halifax, Yorkshire?

Halifax, Nova Scotia, Canada?


There are Halifax branches in a lot of places, they're quite a big bank.