Why do people "play hard to get"?

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That behavior has always REALLY baffled me. Why would you go out of your way to indicate to someone that you are NOT interested in them, when you are?? It seems to me that those who would "chase" someone who seems to be losing interest are those only looking for sex. If anyone's done it, post why and that will REALLY help.

People enjoy chasing or having what they can't have, they enjoy a challenge, in some cases the chase is half of the play and determines who will have sexual power in the relationship. In many cases, it also adds mystery and interest and you certainly won't come off as desperate or needy if you are playing hard to get.

partially it's a test to see just how interested the other person is (if it's not really actually rejection and the person simply gives in from exhaustion of perserverance), and partially I think women of a former era were conditioned to so that they didn't appear to be "sluts".

I've always been accused of playing "hard to get" even though I was never interested in the first place. It's kinda annoying. >.<

i don't play hard to get. either i am interested in somebody or not. i also don't know why some women do it, except that it seems to work for them.

some men don't value what is too easy to obtain (which you can observe on the board when they call promiscuous women sluts/whores, even if those women slept with the men calling them that!). the same goes for dating - some men and women think if it is too easy to attract someone then they must not really be worth it.

I think it's ret*d. I don't do it. I would not comprehend if someone was doing it to me and if I were to attempt to do it I have no idea how to determine where the line between playful "hard to get" and uninterested "cold shoulder" is.

I'm one of those people who doesn't like that. If a woman does that to me, after all my past rejections, I'll just assume that they aren't interested in me and lose interest quickly. I know there are tons of people, men and women alike, who like to chase and chase and chase and be led around, but I don't have the energy for it. Honesty or get the hell out.

Or perhaps more generally, building respect.

i hate "challenges"

This.

Further. It preserves the relationship. Because the man knows it will take a lot of work to forge another relationship of equal quality.

Women are naturally attracted to men who are difficult and unyielding.

Thanks guys. Anyone who may have ever tried to play hard to get with me has instead come across to me as uninterested. Besides, if I guess that she's playing hard to get and guess wrong, guess what? I'm stalking her!! !

I don't think it makes sense to come across as more than a medium difficulty to get. Yes, I can see where people don't want to come across as desperate. But to me, that only justifies talking to someone a bit less frequently than they would otherwise, not outright pretending to be disinterested and risking the person not liking the "challenge."

It just annoys me because I can't always tell who is flirting or not. And I'm awkward enough as it is; how can I go about asking the person to go out somewhere? What if I'm completely reading it wrong?

Yes, this is true.

Because some people never want to come off as desperate or "easy". They want to give the impression that (1) they are confident in their own attractiveness, and (2) they are worth the effort it takes to win their affections.

It also keeps their suitors guessing, and this continued perplexity ensures that the hard-to-get person will become the focus of his or her suitors, and thus further ensure both attention and affirmation.