Is He Gay or is it Just Aspergers?

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Alright, so there's this guy that I have a crush on and he has Aspergers. We've been friends for about 3 years now, and we flirted sometimes, but he's been hot and cold with me all the time: He flirted very ambiguously, met up with me rarely, didn't show any interest sometimes...But recently, I started wondering whether he's in fact gay. The signs are that he's very reluctant in terms of talking about relationships, he's not romantic, he makes these feminine movements sometimes, has pictures of stuffed animals, very neat, and has feminine facial features and small shoulders. I just don't know... Is he gay, or does he just have a bad case of Aspergers? How am I supposed to ask him if he's gay?

Thanks!!

I'd figure the only way to know for sure is to just ask. I doubt that all gay people are feminine, and vice versa. The two are not necessarily synonymous. Neither is being autistic or AS. He may just be shy or nervous or uncertain about you.

Thank you! I was thinking of asking him if he's gay, but I'm not sure how to do so without offending him somehow or ruining anything between us. Any ideas?

I wouldn't ask him ,he may be greatly offended ,ask him out and make sure he knows it is a romantic date.If he isn't interested in you romantically ,why do you really care if he is gay or not .

Or maybe there would be a way of pre-asking, "You know, I was thinking, what if you and I . . . "

(and maybe people here can think of some specifics)

Thanks so much guys. But even if I do ask him on a "romantic date"...how am I supposed to know if he likes me or not? I mean, he does have Aspergers...Besides, it's really hard considering that whenever he makes steps towards me, and I make steps in return, he suddenly goes cold. And when I tried asking him why he's always "hot n' cold" with me, he didn't say anything. Recently, he invited me to this event out of nowhere, we talked, he told me some sweet things....He behaves so strangely!

"i think i am starting to have deeper feelings for you, in a romantic way. do you feel the same way about me?"

we need a lot of alone time to emotionally process feelings we very much enjoy having.

Yes, we can make very good friends and potentially lovers, but we've got to have our healthy amount of alone time.

go out with me i wont let you down :p

I immediatley thought of this:

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xuU3tXSyfKc[/youtube]

I'm gonna go with Dan Savage on this one.

Do you drink (reasonably)? If so, have a beer or two with this person (I'm just talking about getting a relaxing buzz, NOT entering a state of impairment) and if you're both in a pretty good mood and feeling loosened up, start some girltalk.