Infatuation vs. love

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Vito
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03 Feb 2012, 5:37 am

I have a question regarding the difference between infatuation and love. I always viewed these as two different things, but recently some of my acquaintances (and also my girlfriend) told me, that infatuation and love are the same thing. It left me puzzled, because I always viewed infatuation as a strong emotional attraction towards someone and love as very specific non-emotional attitude towards someone very close. However to identify love and infatuation as one thing would imply, that both love and infatuation are emotions yet I still have not experienced any emotion that I would regard as love, though in my single days I experienced periods of strong infatuation.

So my questions are: Are infatuation and love both emotions? If so, what is the difference between them? And if I have not felt any love-like emotion towards someone (even in my current relationship where I recently got over the infatuation period, or towards closest members of my family), does it mean that I am unable to love?

Wolfheart
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03 Feb 2012, 5:48 am

Love is a selfless union between two people, it is when two people become one and work towards a mutual understanding for the greater good. Infatuation is done for selfish purposes and is based on lust without true concern, people that feel infatuation are also self centered or absorbed to the point that the attachment to the other person becomes unhealthy.

Ellingtonia
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03 Feb 2012, 5:50 am

I read a really good web comic about the difference between love and infatuation recently. I can't post URLs yet, but the comic is called SMBC. It's updated daily but the one I'm talking about is from two days ago.

If you can find it, the first four frames actually give a pretty good explanation I think.

hale_bopp
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03 Feb 2012, 6:03 am

Wolfheart wrote:

Well said.

They are 100% NOT the same thing.

Infatuation is a powerful obsession. That's where the term "love sick" comes from. If you're infatuated you're not in your right mind.

Love is a healthy respect, admiration and deep caring for a person.

Vito
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03 Feb 2012, 6:22 am

hale_bopp wrote:

Wolfheart wrote:

Ok, but healthy respect, admiration and deep caring are more associated with attitudes than emotions. Does it mean then, that love is not emotion?

hale_bopp
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03 Feb 2012, 7:23 am

Vito wrote:

hale_bopp wrote:

Wolfheart wrote:

Ok, but healthy respect, admiration and deep caring are more associated with attitudes than emotions. Does it mean then, that love is not emotion?

I wouldn't say those aren't associated with emotion at all.

mv
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03 Feb 2012, 10:10 am

Vito wrote:

Ok, but healthy respect, admiration and deep caring are more associated with attitudes than emotions. Does it mean then, that love is not emotion?

I would say that those are outward manifestations of the emotion of love. All with emotional components of their own.

nick007
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03 Feb 2012, 10:57 am

I think infatuation is the high feeling you get from the other person & love is the feeling of deeply caring about the other person. It's great when they coexist

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Matt62
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03 Feb 2012, 2:53 pm

I used to get infatuated in HS all the time. For some reason, my brain wanted to confuse pity with love/sex interest.
Took falling in love FOR real to correct that malfunction.

Sincerely,
Matthew

smudge
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03 Feb 2012, 5:53 pm

Vito wrote:

Ok, but healthy respect, admiration and deep caring are more associated with attitudes than emotions. Does it mean then, that love is not emotion?

That's what I thought.

MXH
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03 Feb 2012, 8:56 pm

Interesting, Ive never seen infatuation the way wolfheart and hale_bopp do. Ive seen it as the attraction that leads into a relationship and into love. Not a different route of destruction and rampage

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