Asking a girl out, I'm alittle afraid. Need Couragement

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Eric_C
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18 Oct 2006, 6:00 pm

Hi, I've had a crush on this girl in my high school for about a couple of weeks. I have became somewhat friends with her and I feel it's time to ask if she wants to go to the movies with me sometime, but I'm afriad she'll say no. I want her to have her own opinion yes, but I don't know if she knows how much I really care about her, I think about her 24 hours. It's like I need to say hi to her every singe day at school or I'm afriad I'll became very depressed.

All I can say is, love is a very nice yet strange thing. I've never dated in my life and I'm 18.
The last and first person I asked out said yes but I found out that she was faked the hole relationship with both love and friendship.

I feel if I don't get a possitive answer from this girl, I'll have to go scrondging around yet again.

I don't go for just any girl, I go for ones that I feel are very special. I haven't seen anything like that until this year.

Sometimes I don't realize how young I really aim and how long of a life I have to live.

Can somebody give me some advise?

_Eric ;)


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DrowningMedusa
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18 Oct 2006, 6:15 pm

As lame as it sounds, the worst she can do is say no...

Although, if you poke around and try to find out if there's a particular movie she wants to see / activity she would like to do and then suggest that, I think it's more likely she'll say yes.

I'm trying to put myself in her shoes... Or maybe not... I'm not like most girls, really... so I don't know... :roll:



Eric_C
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18 Oct 2006, 6:21 pm

Oh cool, great suggestion. Thanks, I'll go try it out tomarrow.

_Eric ;)


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ooh_choc
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19 Oct 2006, 6:03 am

DrowningMedusa wrote:
As lame as it sounds, the worst she can do is say no...

I disagree with this. In my experience, if the girl does not want a relationship, she may avoid you a bit to make sure she doesn't give the wrong hints, because you make her feel awkward, and because she's suspicious your friendship is just part of your plan for getting with her. This will leave you feeling rejected and depressed. If she does say no, make sure it's very clear that you still want to be friends. Tell her that.

DrowningMedusa wrote:
Although, if you poke around and try to find out if there's a particular movie she wants to see / activity she would like to do and then suggest that, I think it's more likely she'll say yes.
Although I'm not a girl like medusa, I disagree with this. A relationship is far more significant than seeing some dumb movie. If she likes you, she won't be interested in the movie, if she doesn't like you, she'll see her favorite movie with her friends anyway.

Good luck man! Tell us how it goes.



werbert
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20 Oct 2006, 4:12 am

You're good enough, you're smart enough, and, doggone it, people like you.

How's that for encouragement?


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ELLCIM
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20 Oct 2006, 10:29 am

DrowningMedusa wrote:
As lame as it sounds, the worst she can do is say no...


I used to think that way, five years ago. Girls can be vicious and the worst they can do is far more than "no". I became very scared of asking girls out for years because of this...and even today it still freaks me out because of the unknowns of what girls might do. I've had many highly bitter experiences with girls I've liked over the years.

I ask girls out very seldomly...only twice in the past three years, and the first time was "as friends". It is something to be very scared of. My bad experiences haven't been with asking girls out per se, but merely showing interest in them even before getting to the stage of asking them out. If girls can shred me from just a "hello", then the prospects of asking someone out is really, really scary.

Asking a girl out, sadly, is not as easy as I or anyone else would like to think it is. The results can be positive, but the possible negative results are not pleasant. Especially in the left-wing socialist haven here in Canada.



MrSinister
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21 Oct 2006, 8:08 am

DrowningMedusa wrote:
As lame as it sounds, the worst she can do is say no...


In my experience, the worst they can say is either "you're a really nice guy, but..." (which seemingly implies that "nice" is apparently a bad thing, and the notion of being with a nice guy - as opposed to a knuckle-dragging idiot - is equally repellent), or "I'm sorry, but I've realised I'm a lesbian". I've been knocked back with the former several times, and the latter once, after my most recent confession of affection for a girl.

The latter hurt more, actually, considering how I'd already convinced myself to never tell her how I felt, ever (I really didn't want to spoil our friendship, you see. The risk of having her run away screaming was far too high, in my mind). She dragged it out of me over dinner, and then hit me with the hardest blow I've ever experienced. We're still friends, sure, but the pain was really intense. Worse than I'd ever felt before, actually - I think my heart truly broke that day :cry:

So yeah. "No" is pretty far down the list of things she could say...



Xuincherguixe
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26 Oct 2006, 4:37 am

It's much worse in my experience to not express ones feelings, than to be rejected.

Go for it. Probably the worst that will happen is you get a polite rejection.



JonDevine
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26 Oct 2006, 12:15 pm

Bad Experience #1- a Girl screamed when I asked her out. Like a horror-movie-scared-her scream

Bad Experience #2- another girl spread rumors that I was gay and ruined chance of me asking any girl in my classs out again

Bad Experience 3- I told a girl I thought I loved her and she said sorry, she doesn't feel the same way, but now expects me to give her all my money because of how I feel about her.


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