How do you get a girl to hang out with you?

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So I will try to go out and meet girls. I decided that the best thing to do was be my weird self, so if she likes me its actually me and not a facade. So sometimes I get lucky and they find me funny and we become friends on Facebook or something (I feel like a creep asking for a number). But when I message them the next day or two I get no reply. And I can't read people well, but I swear they liked me when I'm talking to them.

I usually only message once, then if they don't respond I give up.

I know it is hard to give advice online, but if anyone has any suggestions of any sort, I would love to hear them. Even if you question your reply's pertinance, its better than no response to me. This is BY FAR the most frustrating aspect of my life, and feel so clueless.

Well, how do the conversations go? What do you talk about?

what kind of messages do you send them about hanging out? like how do you frame the question?

Because someone can't be bothered talking to you on the internet doesn't mean they don't like you or don't want to be friends. I like heaps of people IRL that I would never bother engaging in conversation with online.

You need to expand your group of offline friends.

very true, but in my experience people who are flakey and bad at communicating online often are flakey and incommunicative in real life. not always though!

For others on-line one on one communication is completely uninteresting.

did you try facebook chat? talk to them for a bit on facebook. after a while, if you feel its going well, say 'hey, i'd much rather talk to you on the phone, whats your phone number?'

then ask them if they'd like to hang out sometime!

And girls are cool with being that forward? Being that assertive makes me nervous, cause I'm afraid I've read her wrong and she thinks I'm creepy. It sucks having little clue what she's feeling. But trying something new like this is no fun anyway.

Actually calling someone scares me too, cause its all real-time, lol. I guess I have to be able to talk to them at some point, though, might as well be sooner than later.

Thanks!

I seem to be having the same problem. I gave a girl my cell number, because I couldn't ask for her's, and decided to try letting her make the next move. But, in general, I don't seem to do well with that sort of thing. I can talk to girls about anything, except, if I like them, I tend not to be able to tell them that. This time, I managed to take the next step, but that step seemed very daunting(and I put it off for quite a while). Maybe I went about it the wrong way? I tend to overthink things though. It's just coffee, as friends. Maybe I scared her off too. See, the big secret women don't want guys to know, is that they're just as nervous around us(a fact that I can easily forget, as I have in this case). I will say, if I got her number, I'd find the task of bringing myself to call her even more daunting. Plus, I wouldn't know when a good time to call would be. But, if I didn't call, I would worry about the consequences of not calling. I find face-to-face interactions to be much more manageable for those reasons. Maybe it's the same for her. In which case, I should just ask her if she'd want to meet me at a certain location, and to figure out a time. It's not like I won't be seeing her, since she is a co-worker.

I share the OP's frustrations. I can't even get girls interested in being friends with me, let alone getting a girlfriend. Sometimes I manage to get one to add me as a FB friend, but when I try and message, no response. Even though when we met, I was sure they seemed to like talking to me.

depends on the girl. there isn't a method that works for everyone like a skeleton key.

on Facebook, even if a girl met someone in real life first, she may prefer if someone approached slowly to test the waters first. small steps like clicking "like" on a post or commenting on a status update would work, but it's probably best to use these methods sparingly. it sort of brings you across the person's radar so they remember you and can see that you are establishing the online contact publicly at first (less creepy).

then she may respond to you or may do the same on your page, and at that point a message would be good. nothing too heavy, just a short simple message, maybe making a comment and asking a question. a conversation could be started, then you could suggest that you meet in person.

this is just my suggestion for what would feel natural and unhurried, yet also signaling interest. but i do not know if other women would like it this way.

I know I am cool with guys being that forward.......though usually if I start talking to a guy online we discuss meeting up before even exchanging phone numbers. I guess I feel like its nice to just get to it instead of bothering with hours and hours of internet conversation, before so much as even exchanging phone numbers.

Ask!

Oooo my post was deleted D:

^^^yes, it was removed as it was too sexist.

You have to find a common interest. When I was in college and single this is what a nt guy did to get me to hang out. 1) mention an interesting place, in his case it was a big and very cool comic book store, 2) why I should go , do you have free time to check out these graphic novels by neil gaiman, "they are really good and I think you'll like them". I did have free time, and I was interested in going to that store because it sounded cool and he was nonchalant (I am going w or wo you) so I didn't feel pressured. It was a cool place and that was my intro to neil gaiman (yes, many years ago) graphic novels. That guy was always doing interesting stuff and I hung out with him a lot and eventually dated him.
So think of a cool nonchalant place that won't scream date (no movie theater), tell her you are planning to go to .......... because .............., do you want to go check it out with me?
It has to be somewhere that you like and know and can be enthusiastic about. One more thing, if she can't go with you, don't change your plans, go with friends or alone. That way next time you see her, you can tell her about it and she'll know that she didn't ruin your plans. Enthusiasm is what made me want to hang out with guys and people in general, enthusiasm is contagious, so I get curious and end up going.

By the way, you can also start by lending her something or asking to borrow something, comic, book, movie, anime, manga, etc. That's what some guys did to me, "oh, here is a ...... that I think you are gonna like." Then you have something to talk about.