Email my feelings to a friend?

Post Reply New Topic

6 years ago this gal started working at the pizza place I work at. The first time I talked to her up close something grabbed at my heart. A few months later she asked me out on a date. I wanted to, but declined and said there was too much of an age difference between us. In my mind I was thinking she was too young but did not tell her. She was 19 and I was 39. I once replaced an alternator on her car on a very hot day. I loved listening to her sweet intense voice and looking at her beautiful face. We never did go out on a date. A year after she started working there a phone call came in from her mom that Abby will not be working there anymore and was in the hospital. She had a lot of stress in her life and developed bi-polar disorder. I was completely lost and was crying that day as I never got to say goodbye to her. I never expressed any feelings to her. I talked to her on the phone a few times in the next 8 months. She moved back to Montana to live with her parents on their farm. I send her about 2-4 emails a year and she replies with about 1-2 emails a year. Her parents don't have internet so she has to go to the library to do emails. She moved back here once in the last 5 years then back to Montana and I did not see her at that time. She is bisexual. I am a male. I sent her an email last fall telling her I still work at the same place and asked if she ever gets back into town to visit family,,, to come and see me because I still work at the same pizza place. She ordered some carryout food and came in to get it one evening in late November 2011 and gave me a hug and we were able to chat for about 5 minutes. Then she had to go back to her sisters place. I have no idea if she has any feelings for me or just considers me a friend or nice guy. She has wanted to move back here to go to school and said she would see if she could work at the same pizza place again where I still work. I have thought of expressing my feelings to her in an email but I feel that an email "might" be a little bit cold compared to doing it in person. I have no idea when she will move back here or if it will ever happen again. She is now 25 and I am 45. I do know that people with bi-polar can be quite difficult to be in a relationship with. Please give me your advise or ideas.

Here's my quick reply:

1) You're as old as the Universe!

2) My mom has Bipolar disorder, and she's in a relationship with my stepdad. It's really hard to get along with her sometimes, but she does care about us and with the right support (and occasional medication) she can do fine. Besides, just because that girl has Bipolar doesn't mean she can't be a good person or that she doesn't deserve a relationship. If you care enough about her to put in the effort, go for it.

I don't think the age gap is a big deal, lots of successful relationships have that kind of gap. Tell her. why not?

She is a really nice gal. Most everyone liked her accept for the last month she worked at the pizza place when she became really agressive. I have no idea if she is on any medications. I have delivered pizza to one of her sisters,, but that sister is one who pushed her to go into the hospital. Because of that Abby doesn't talk to her.

Worth a try, there's no point in analysing it, it's her life and up to her if she decides whether she wants a relationship with you or not but you won't know unless you ask.