Constant lack of interest sexually

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Hi everyone,

I've found myself lacking sexual interest in anyone and everyone I have seen while walking about, shopping, whilst at work etc. For a good six months, I have not had any interest in anybody. Its hard for me to find any attraction to people I see in the average day.

I was recently approached on by a woman which I think most men would find appealing, yet strangely I did not give a second thought to instantly rejecting her, which I should have handled better.

Not sure if this is some kind of trauma after my last relationship ("So... I became someone's sex toy" thread on this site, cannot paste links!) where I was abused ? I never enjoyed sex in my last relationship so it makes me wander if it may be a case of perhaps even becoming asexual.

Looked up on Netdoctor for reasons for lack of sex drive in men and got this:

Physical causes

Alcoholism (I don't drink)
Abuse of drugs such as cocaine. (Never done drugs)
Obesity. (I weigh 10 stone as a 23 year old male, 6,4 height; that's pretty much perfect >.<)
Anaemia (Last I checked, all my limbs were there)
Hyperprolactinaemia (Symptoms of Hyperprolactinaemia also state erectile dysfunction which I have never had)
Prescribed drugs (Not on any meds)
Low testosterone level (Lots of Acne all over my chest and back, think this one is safe to rule out!)
Any major disease such as diabetes. (Had cholesterol, sugar, blood pressure tests and others last month, everything came out as great, not had any strange symptoms)

Psychological causes

Depression (Maybe a little, don't find myself thinking negatively much, just get lonely)
Stress and overwork. (Find myself having less work to do most of the time and finding myself bored sat in my chair slacking off more than stressing out)
Hang-ups from childhood. (Don't look back at my childhood much)
Latent homosexuality. (Really not sure about this one, don't have any attraction to men either though it is possible as although I never enjoyed sex with my last partner who was male, I did love him)

Well looks like its rather Depression, Latent Homosexuality or a major disease? >.<. Seriously though, I have no idea what is causing this! Any ideas?

I found because of one relationship I had I couldn't enjoy sex for years and as such also couldn't think about any women that way. I would think about them romantically only.

Do you find.....
*You don't find sex jokes funny? But even more so you find even talking about it awkward and offensive?
*You aren't confident to approach girls because even if things are in your favour it could lead to sex again?
*When you are in a position where sex might be on the cards do you find yourself constantly thinking "oh here it comes here it comes..." and then you can't or just duck out?
*You can't explain this to anyone?

If so, I would just be honest and say you want to take things slow, and possibly looking at another AS partner as many can fit this need (though many do have high sex drives). It would also be better to establish a relationship with someone who is already a friend, and have that friendship be long term before you decide to progress further. On dating sites I would say look for a friend or companion.

go to your GP

general advice would be to make sure you are actually getting a good diet, very few people actually do. you may be missing one vitamin or mineral that tips a balance.

do you/can you masturbate?

do you look at porn/find it arrousing?

Yeah, get a check up for sure. But it may also be you're just not an incredible panting sex machine & that's fine. My partner & I haven't had sex in years & we're quite content to snuggle & smile. Sex is a lot of work, silly when you think about how it looks & often not that satisfying. We'd both rather read a book & have a stimulating conversation.

Maybe that's why you rejected the looker... no conversation interest. Perhaps what turns you on has changed & you haven't met it yet.

It seems like the rate of asexuality in the ASD population is higher than average (I don't have any official stats about that, though). So, that is a possibility.

Could be a hormone imbalance thing... I don't know, really.

The less sex I get, the less I seem to crave it... but that could have been my ex-wife's plan throughout our marriage.

I still think sex for sex's sake is a bad idea - too many people get hurt in too many ways. Nothing's better than bonding sex with pure love and zero guilt. Anything less is a cheap imitation.

I agree, a good diet and exercise are the first ways to having a healthy sex drive, eat plenty of celery in the day time because that will also help.

You could also try these herbal supplements, I suggest you buy a horny goat weed, maca and Yohimbine supplement, perhaps testosterone shots might help and you need to discuss that personally with your GP.

I feel the same way you do. Maybe you're just asexual?