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PastFixations
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21 Jun 2012, 10:47 am

Honestly, that is the only way you can find a relationship irl.
The more you read up on all these statistics and theories, the less likely you will have any confidence to approach a potential partner.
At first, you just need confidence... nothing else.


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Boxman108
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21 Jun 2012, 10:51 am

It's not so much about confidence as it is about being a giant egotistical douchebag.


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PastFixations
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21 Jun 2012, 10:52 am

This does exclude Internet Dating and focuses on Interaction with Real Life Situation.


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PastFixations
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21 Jun 2012, 10:56 am

Boxman108 wrote:
It's not so much about confidence as it is about being a giant egotistical douchebag.

See, you believe that and let that eat away at you which is why you won't be able to have any confidence in yourself when trying to find a potential partner.


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Boxman108
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21 Jun 2012, 11:00 am

Confidence is just an excuse to be an as*hole. There's no reason to treat other people like s**t. If walking all over other people is what it takes just to get someone to like you, they're not worth it. How anyone could sleep at night after doing that is beyond me.


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Tim_Tex
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21 Jun 2012, 11:01 am

PastFixations,

Perhaps you could give people a clear definition of what confidence is. I don't think it's been adequately defined, considering how often it's mentioned.

Also, this is my opinion, but even though these threads center around men having confidence, it's also important for women to have it as well.


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Last edited by Tim_Tex on 21 Jun 2012, 11:01 am, edited 1 time in total.

PTSmorrow
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21 Jun 2012, 11:01 am

Never been looking for anything -- relationship, romance, sex, affairs. It has always found me, just happened to me.



McAnulty
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21 Jun 2012, 11:31 am

Confidence doesn't mean you have to act like an as*hole. It's just about feeling capable and good about yourself. It's not the same as being egotistical, which is more about feeling so good about yourself that you think you are better than other people. Confidence is absolutely an important aspect of dating, being an egotistical douchebag not so much.



Lorann
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21 Jun 2012, 11:54 am

WIKI TELLS US:
Confidence is generally described as a state of being certain either that a hypothesis or prediction is correct or that a chosen course of action is the best or most effective. Self-confidence is having confidence in oneself. Arrogance or hubris in this comparison, is having unmerited confidence—believing something or someone is capable or correct when they are not. Overconfidence or presumptuousness is excessive belief in someone (or something) succeeding, without any regard for failure. Scientifically, a situation can only be judged after the aim has been achieved or not. Confidence can be a self-fulfilling prophecy as those without it may fail or not try because they lack it and those with it may succeed because they have it rather than because of an innate ability.



HisDivineMajesty
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21 Jun 2012, 11:56 am

Boxman108 wrote:
It's not so much about confidence as it is about being a giant egotistical douchebag.


If it was, I'd be surrounded by voluptuous blondes by now. :lol:
I think it's about confidence, as well as physical dominance. The "tall" in "tall and handsome" isn't called "tall" because that word sounds nice.



PastFixations
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21 Jun 2012, 12:09 pm

McAnulty is spot on with my thread meaning.
Having confidence in yourself does not mean to act like a jerk.
It's about encouraging yourself to talk and not thinking of anything that you believe they don't like about you.
Confidence is about being certain in your abilities or qualities...
Overconfidence are what the jerks tend to end up because they think have the power to do what they please.


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rabbittss
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21 Jun 2012, 12:12 pm

PastFixations wrote:
Confidence is about being certain in your abilities or qualities...


a wise, cyborg fruit bat once said 'Only fools are positive'... and I tend to equate certainty with being positive..



PastFixations
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21 Jun 2012, 12:14 pm

HisDivineMajesty wrote:
I think it's about confidence, as well as physical dominance. The "tall" in "tall and handsome" isn't called "tall" because that word sounds nice.

No... It's about confidence and preference rather than physical dominance.


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muslimmetalhead
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21 Jun 2012, 12:16 pm

PastFixations wrote:
McAnulty is spot on with my thread meaning.
Having confidence in yourself does not mean to act like a jerk.
It's about encouraging yourself to talk and not thinking of anything that you believe they don't like about you.
Confidence is about being certain in your abilities or qualities...
Overconfidence are what the jerks tend to end up because they think have the power to do what they please.



Yes, this is EXACTLY what is hard for Aspies to come by, because we usually do not have sense of exactly what we are doing.

So we look over-confident.

One who knows what he is doing is called confident.

Asperger's by definition is an impairment in knowing what we are doing socially.


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PastFixations
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21 Jun 2012, 12:17 pm

rabbittss wrote:
PastFixations wrote:
Confidence is about being certain in your abilities or qualities...


a wise, cyborg fruit bat once said 'Only fools are positive'... and I tend to equate certainty with being positive..

Well then, that is a good thing as being positive generates optimism in yourself.


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Sora: "My friends are my power."

Ventus: "I'm asking you as a friend. Just... put an end to me."