How do you determine if you are physically attractive?

Page 1 of 8 [ 117 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 8  Next

Gnonymouse
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 145

27 Jul 2012, 12:57 pm

In light of the popular "do you consider yourself physically attractive?" threads, how does one actually determine whether they are physically attractive?

I think NTs with many relationships learn based on the attractiveness of their partners what "league" they are in. I am not sure what "league" I'm in except that it's far from attractive, but not butt-ugly. How do you guys determine your attractiveness or improve it?



PastFixations
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Sep 2011
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,735

27 Jul 2012, 1:11 pm

Looking in the mirror?
In all serious though I get what your saying. I think I am fairly attractive.
I think that it is down to dress sense... personally mine can be abysmal however some days it does match up very well with my own self.


_________________
www.wrongplanet.net/postp5013377.html&h ... t=#5013377

Sora: "My friends are my power."

Ventus: "I'm asking you as a friend. Just... put an end to me."


Bun
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Jan 2012
Age: 40
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,356

27 Jul 2012, 1:14 pm

At the price of sounding controversial, try to think what you find attractive in your own sex. Most people have a degree of same-sex attraction.


_________________
Double X and proud of it / male pronouns : he, him, his


HisDivineMajesty
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 31 Jan 2012
Age: 30
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,364
Location: Planet Earth

27 Jul 2012, 1:19 pm

Usually, I compare myself to other men and see what kind of partners they have. It's all relative. I don't need to outrun the lion by looking like a body builder and actor, but I need to outrun the other zebra by looking better than the legion of other guys women can pick from. But even when standards of beauty are largely abandoned, I'm still in a bad position. I've yet to meet a man less attractive than myself who has managed to find a partner at this age, or is able to get laid without paying. Interestingly, most girls, despite their looks, are able to do those things with no problem whatsoever. It's hard to defend the idea that it's equally hard for both sexes.



Colinn
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 7 Apr 2012
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,192

27 Jul 2012, 1:24 pm

Bun wrote:
At the price of sounding controversial, try to think what you find attractive in your own sex. Most people have a degree of same-sex attraction.


If you really can't tell, this could be a good way to do it. Even straight males can see what features would be considered attractive. So maybe compare yourself to other men that are widely seen as attractive and see how you compare. If you are still not sure then also consider how many times you have been complimented on your appearance throughout your life.



Delphiki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Apr 2012
Age: 181
Gender: Male
Posts: 1,415
Location: My own version of reality

27 Jul 2012, 1:27 pm

Be in decent shape, kinda obvious, but if you work out some and are not under or over weight then it is much more likely you are attractive. If people complement you on your looks when you don't even ask them.


_________________
Well you can go with that if you want.


VincitOmniaVeritas
Butterfly
Butterfly

User avatar

Joined: 25 Jul 2012
Age: 32
Gender: Male
Posts: 15

27 Jul 2012, 1:49 pm

Do yoga every day! All there is to know :)


_________________
I'm an APE (Autodidactic Polymathic Existentialist)


MXH
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 28 Jul 2010
Age: 33
Gender: Male
Posts: 13,057
Location: Here i stand and face the rain

27 Jul 2012, 2:03 pm

Well, i compare myself to the guys that are found attractive, and compare my luck with women to their. and to not place myself as a 0 ill use some of those soft spoken things ive heard (probably too sweetened up to be true) to not make myself feel that bad.



aspiemike
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 8 Jul 2012
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,287
Location: Canada

27 Jul 2012, 3:38 pm

Someone said something about looking in the mirror. Another good suggestion based on that is look at yourself in the mirror when you are naked and if you feel truly happy with who you are and what you are looking at,, then you are probably attractive (based on confidence alone). Confidence can be conveyed in your physical appearance and this is one of the key traits that attract women.



hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

27 Jul 2012, 3:51 pm

interesting question. people are not actually very good at determining this, apparently. they consistently rate themselves "above average" which can't be accurate for obvious reasons. if most people are above average, then that must actually be... average.

but ultimately it's kind of irrelevant, because the important part is how you feel inside and also how others respond to you - both of which are usually based on more than just the basic physical appearance.

edit: here is an interesting article:

Quote:
We tested the hypothesis that previously observed poor accuracy of self-assessed attractiveness resulted from methodological drawbacks. However, the accuracy obtained with a refined methodology was not significantly higher than the standard method. This justified the use of numeric scales for attractiveness self-evaluation and indicated that well-known intra-pair matching on physical attractiveness occurs with little awareness of own attractiveness. A model of assortative pairing with no knowledge of own attractiveness is proposed. The model posits that mating behavior experienced by an individual from others exerts a regulatory influence on his/her own mating strategy and behavior. Although the modest accuracy in self-assessment may enhance the matching in physical attractiveness and, thereby, reproductive success, it is also proposed that overestimation of own
attractiveness may be adaptive for people interested in short-term relationships.

http://www.anthro.amu.edu.pl/pdf/paar/v ... 6kosci.pdf


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Last edited by hyperlexian on 27 Jul 2012, 3:56 pm, edited 2 times in total.

deltafunction
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 4 Jun 2012
Age: 32
Gender: Female
Posts: 1,094
Location: Lost

27 Jul 2012, 3:53 pm

I basically agree with everyone here so far.

hyperlexian wrote:
interesting question. people are not actually very good at determining this, apparently. they consistently rate themselves "above average" which can't be accurate for obvious reasons. if most people are above average, then that must actually be... average.

but ultimately it's kind of irrelevant, because the important part is how you feel inside and also how others respond to you - both of which are usually based on more than just the basic physical appearance.


I guess that's the difference between inner beauty and outer beauty?



hyperlexian
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Jul 2010
Age: 52
Gender: Female
Posts: 22,023
Location: with bucephalus

27 Jul 2012, 3:56 pm

deltafunction wrote:
I basically agree with everyone here so far.

hyperlexian wrote:
interesting question. people are not actually very good at determining this, apparently. they consistently rate themselves "above average" which can't be accurate for obvious reasons. if most people are above average, then that must actually be... average.

but ultimately it's kind of irrelevant, because the important part is how you feel inside and also how others respond to you - both of which are usually based on more than just the basic physical appearance.


I guess that's the difference between inner beauty and outer beauty?

i think so. inner beauty seems to be fairly important to both sexes in deciding who to date in real-life interactive situations (aside from speed dating and looking at photos to decide).


_________________
on a break, so if you need assistance please contact another moderator from this list:
viewtopic.php?t=391105


Mindslave
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 14 Nov 2010
Age: 35
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,034
Location: Where the wild things wish they were

27 Jul 2012, 5:55 pm

You are only as physically attractive as the preferences of the people you are interested in.



Gnonymouse
Snowy Owl
Snowy Owl

User avatar

Joined: 26 Aug 2011
Age: 38
Gender: Male
Posts: 145

27 Jul 2012, 6:04 pm

hyperlexian wrote:
interesting question. people are not actually very good at determining this, apparently. they consistently rate themselves "above average" which can't be accurate for obvious reasons. if most people are above average, then that must actually be... average.

but ultimately it's kind of irrelevant, because the important part is how you feel inside and also how others respond to you - both of which are usually based on more than just the basic physical appearance.


Thank you for the article, but it concluded that people are matched based on attractiveness and one mechanism for this is having relationships and courting others. I guess most of us have some idea of where we fall intuitively, it's just a matter to putting it to the test.



unduki
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 21 Oct 2011
Age: 64
Gender: Female
Posts: 652

27 Jul 2012, 6:07 pm

People will tell you - with words, even - if you are attractive. Listen.

Also, attraction is subjective. I think Tom Selleck, George Clooney and Sam Elliot are good looking, my sister goes ga-ga over Bon Jovi (gag...) It just depends on personal preferences.


_________________
Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass; it's about learning to dance in the rain.


JanuaryMan
Veteran
Veteran

User avatar

Joined: 1 Jan 2012
Age: 39
Gender: Male
Posts: 3,359

27 Jul 2012, 7:35 pm

If you are attractive, people will throw their underwear at you :)
If you aren't, they will throw an egg!