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Duncan
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14 Sep 2012, 5:35 pm

Ok there's this girl I like, Sarah. It's going well but still in the early stages and soon I want to push it forward a little. Ideally I would like to 'hang out' with her a little before we head towards dating properly so we can get to know each better.

Here's the problem, talking to her on the phone. I have aspie hearing, meaning I hear too much of background noise and not much of human voices. The way I normally deal with this by learning the sound of their voices but she's a fairly recent addition to my social circle so I haven't learnt her voice yet. We do however talk by text based communications which can be limiting at time. Just last night we had a misunderstanding because I couldn't demonstrate tone in typed communication.

Maybe I'm just worked up over this, nonetheless I want to find to get over this phone issue.



Rorberyllium
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14 Sep 2012, 5:44 pm

I don't know the solution but I absoluitely hate phones and totally get how you're feeling.



Blammo
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14 Sep 2012, 11:06 pm

Time will help. Adding smiley's to illustrate your emotion or tone in text helps XD :)


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Since everyone else has this on their signatures.. might as well conform:

Your Aspie score: 121 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 107 of 200 You seem to have both Aspie and neurotypical traits


KenM
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15 Sep 2012, 3:21 am

Maybe she likes texting better then talking.



Duncan
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15 Sep 2012, 5:30 am

She might prefer text over speech but would be nice to hear tone of voice too. I might just wait for the next group night out but get a chance to learn her voice because I want to keep this flirtation/ attraction between me and her.



MacDragard
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15 Sep 2012, 2:23 pm

Nothing wrong with just texting.



Duncan
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19 Sep 2012, 4:31 pm

There is a problem, I'm not getting enough feedback from her. She can hold back things if she feels vulnerable when she's texts.

This is important because I worked she likes from small moments of vulnerable on her part when I see in person. Also knowing when she is vulnerable will prevent me from upsetting her needlessly.

I've decided I'll phone her tomorrow evening, the potential gains outweigh the risks. I think I've think I have main issue under control. Anxiety and nerves. If I don't, I don't but I'll know and won't be a disaster



JanuaryMan
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19 Sep 2012, 6:13 pm

Texting is ok :)



LordExiron
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19 Sep 2012, 9:17 pm

Duncan wrote:
There is a problem, I'm not getting enough feedback from her. She can hold back things if she feels vulnerable when she's texts.

This is important because I worked she likes from small moments of vulnerable on her part when I see in person. Also knowing when she is vulnerable will prevent me from upsetting her needlessly.

I've decided I'll phone her tomorrow evening, the potential gains outweigh the risks. I think I've think I have main issue under control. Anxiety and nerves. If I don't, I don't but I'll know and won't be a disaster


Good luck. Just think: she might be just as nervous as you, and it will make you look good for being the one to step up to the plate. In today's world, transitioning from texting to the first phone call is actually a big step, at least it is for me and it seems to be for other people when it comes to dating.



Duncan
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20 Sep 2012, 3:07 pm

Turns she prefers texting but the phone call went well. At least I've past the first phone call thereby changing the nature of the relationship. She seem fairly open and genuine but had an argument with earlier today so cut the conversation short. She texted right after the call to aplogise about cutting the call short.



Northeastern292
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20 Sep 2012, 5:16 pm

Most girls prefer texting. I just think texting these days has gone overboard.