Going on first date tomarrow. Please advise on flirting.

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I am finally going on a date with the guy I met on OKcupid. He will be coming in town for his job, and the plan is to meet for lunch/dinner over the afternoon and evening. We have been talking over the phone or by text every day (with few exceptions) for the past month. He also has AS (but less severe). He is different from me, but in a way that seems nice and fitting.

One thing I have had trouble with in our conversations is knowing when he is joking or serious. Also flirting seems to be a problem, as he will say a statement that I take literally and purse as a speaking point for 5 min before he can break in and say he was flirting (this may go back to the not sure when he is serious or joking problem). Then when I go "oh, when he says topic x he is flirting" so I try to respond in a similar manner, and it mostly goes flat. I have trouble with the flirting line of too conservative, flirty, and too sensual. I think that is how it is divided (?) but I do not know for sure. Either way I have trouble appropriately returning flirting. On the whole I do not see the point of flirting but if he says it brings benefit to the relationship I want to do it because it makes him happy (sort of like how I sometimes smile to make another person happy, or return a hug when I do not like them because it makes another person happy).

Any advice on flirting, first dates, or meeting for the first time after one has developed a month long conversation will be appreciated.

General advice on this seems to be - to relax, enjoy being with him and listen to what hes got to say. I would imagine it will be easier for him to see if you are responding well to his chat, and alter it if he sees your struggling? But without know the guy, it will be hard to say.

The date went well I think. I still have trouble with knowing when he is flirting, oh well. Now to see if second date happens.