why can't more women be like my ex gf

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billiscool
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08 Dec 2012, 7:13 pm

my ex girlfriend to me,is what more women should be like.
She asked me out, she did everything. She plan when to hang out, she plan when we had sex,
she did 95% of the talking. I did pay for some of her meals but she always paid me back for it.
And I only paid a couple time for her, she paid for all her stuff and she was poor too.
she also had autism too.

too bad she left me. to this day only one other women I know comes close to her personality.
It was nice for little more than one year having a woman who wants to hang out with me and is
willing to make out and sleep with me.

she didn't give a s**t if I was shy, or a ''wimp'''. or didn't act like other guys.
she look passes on that s**t and seen me as a good guy.

her personality may not be the best for all men but for men with autism, she defiently is perfect for them.
she was also different from other aspie/hfa female I know. Most of them (aspie/hfa) all act like nt women when it comes to dating.
But my ex was even different from the average aspie/hfa women.



CrazyStarlightRedux
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08 Dec 2012, 8:17 pm

Every woman is unique.

Kind of an obvious answer dude. :lol:


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OlivG
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08 Dec 2012, 8:28 pm

CrazyStarlightRedux wrote:
Every woman is unique.

Kind of an obvious answer dude. :lol:


Only to an extent. There are two major factors that affect behavior, one being the "variable background" (interests, culture, etc), and the other being the neurotype. The latter is why it's "only to an extent".



ShamelessGit
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08 Dec 2012, 8:52 pm

If that's how you really acted, then I would have dumped you too. If she's paying for most of the things and planning everything (even the sex) and talks 95% of the time, it doesn't sound like you met her half-way. I could not stand to be around somebody who was that passive.



billiscool
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08 Dec 2012, 9:08 pm

ShamelessGit wrote:
If that's how you really acted, then I would have dumped you too. If she's paying for most of the things and planning everything (even the sex) and talks 95% of the time, it doesn't sound like you met her half-way. I could not stand to be around somebody who was that passive.

I don't know about you but if some cute girl asked you out, was willing to pay for almost everything, want to hang out, and was willing to have sex and make out, would you dump her.
everything she did, was on her own power. I never force her to do anything. It was all her. Why she left me, had nothing to do with me being so ''passive''.



MrXxx
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08 Dec 2012, 9:20 pm

billiscool wrote:
Why she left me, had nothing to do with me being so ''passive''.


You're free to believe that if you want to, but I think you'll find that if you keep it up like that, you'll end up with a collection of women just like her.

All ex-girlfriends. :shrug:


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billiscool
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08 Dec 2012, 9:34 pm

MrXxx wrote:
billiscool wrote:
Why she left me, had nothing to do with me being so ''passive''.


You're free to believe that if you want to, but I think you'll find that if you keep it up like that, you'll end up with a collection of women just like her.

All ex-girlfriends. :shrug:

wrong. she never once told me I was too passive ever. she left me because I was an idiot and I f it up. I have regret it since.



MrXxx
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08 Dec 2012, 9:40 pm

billiscool wrote:
MrXxx wrote:
billiscool wrote:
Why she left me, had nothing to do with me being so ''passive''.


You're free to believe that if you want to, but I think you'll find that if you keep it up like that, you'll end up with a collection of women just like her.

All ex-girlfriends. :shrug:

wrong. she never once told me I was too passive ever. she left me because I was an idiot and I f it up. I have regret it since.


And you are so certain that whatever is was you did was all it was? Sometimes the eff up is nothing more than the final straw they've been waiting for as the perfect reason to make an exit. Some women won't say it. Heck, some men won't either.

All I'm telling you is even if that isn't the reason she left, it'll sure as heck be the reason you're going to have a hard time finding or remaining with another woman. Trust me, nobody, man or woman, really likes to be the only one making all the decisions and taking all the responsibility.

If you aren't willing to accept that, then good luck to you. You're going to need it.


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OMGitsKenny
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08 Dec 2012, 10:54 pm

MrXxx wrote:
billiscool wrote:
MrXxx wrote:
billiscool wrote:
Why she left me, had nothing to do with me being so ''passive''.


You're free to believe that if you want to, but I think you'll find that if you keep it up like that, you'll end up with a collection of women just like her.

All ex-girlfriends. :shrug:

wrong. she never once told me I was too passive ever. she left me because I was an idiot and I f it up. I have regret it since.


And you are so certain that whatever is was you did was all it was? Sometimes the eff up is nothing more than the final straw they've been waiting for as the perfect reason to make an exit. Some women won't say it. Heck, some men won't either.

All I'm telling you is even if that isn't the reason she left, it'll sure as heck be the reason you're going to have a hard time finding or remaining with another woman. Trust me, nobody, man or woman, really likes to be the only one making all the decisions and taking all the responsibility.

If you aren't willing to accept that, then good luck to you. You're going to need it.


This

I don't want to sound mean, but ShamelessGit and MrXxx both have very valid points. Relationships are a give and take tradeoff. Straight down the line of 50/50. If she's doing almost all the work, she will more than likely get frustrated and find an opportunity to leave you. Maybe she was hoping you'd step up your game and you pick up the slack, and when she saw that you weren't, she dumped you.

If you want a girl to love you, you have to meet to her needs as well. You'll need to treat her like a true man, not just sit back and she does all the thinking. That a real sh***y thing to do to someone.


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thewhitrbbit
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08 Dec 2012, 10:56 pm

Three possibilities:

1.) She left because you were passive/needy but lied very well

2.) She enjoys being in a caregiver role.

3.) She's a sugar mamma.



blue_bean
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08 Dec 2012, 11:06 pm

I know where to find the next best woman (I say next best because sex would be out of the equation);

Your mother.



billiscool
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08 Dec 2012, 11:13 pm

you guys really have no idea what type of woman my ex was. She willing did all that stuff: paying for stuff, do all the talking, planning when to hang out, when to have sex,etc. She never once complain ever about all that. you guys telling me: if meet a woman just like that. attractive,willing to plan and pay for everything, would guys stay with her or dump her.

me being idiot is what ruin the relationship. I had the perfect girlfriend, and I screwed it up. many women I talk to now are just boring and are not fun, that another thing about my ex she was fun, she was happy, full of energy, telling me about one of her wild (most likely untrue) adventures.
it was awesome, it a shame that very few women are just like her. She should be a role model to all women.
even though she left me, I still love her and would go back to her. But I f---k up. and have nothing else to do but maybe get lucky and find another woman but I doubt they will be like her.



MCalavera
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08 Dec 2012, 11:54 pm

Guys, maybe the OP really did do something majorly stupid that was the pure reason for her to leave him.

What did you do to her, man? Tell us. :P



billiscool
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09 Dec 2012, 12:15 am

MCalavera wrote:
Guys, maybe the OP really did do something majorly stupid that was the pure reason for her to leave him.

What did you do to her, man? Tell us. :P


what happen was: she thought I didn't loved or cared for her. but instead of telling her what I really felt. I just act like an idiot.
I didn't come across as loving her. once she left me. I got pretty sad, it was years later when I look back and say to myself
''dam it , I had a good woman in my life, why didn't I just tell her how much I loved her, why was I such an idiot,back then''
some of the idiot stuff I did was: she said loved me but I just go ''oh, really'' or she tell me how much I mean to her and when she telling me that,
I just act all bored and not interest. I don't know why I did them thing, I did care and really loved her.
I can only blame myself. Every day since june of 2007, I regret losing her.



Last edited by billiscool on 09 Dec 2012, 12:30 am, edited 1 time in total.

yellowtamarin
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09 Dec 2012, 12:28 am

billiscool wrote:
MCalavera wrote:
Guys, maybe the OP really did do something majorly stupid that was the pure reason for her to leave him.

What did you do to her, man? Tell us. :P

I was an idiot. at times I was rude and act like a douchebag. here a woman who wanted to be with me, told me she loved me, and I was only the man for her, and I act like an idiot. I had a woman and I screwed it up. just my luck, here a woman who want to do everything for me, want to be with me, and I f---k up. And now Im just a some single guy with no gf.

if a woman ever tell you she love you, say it back and act like it too. Don't be stupid and make her leave.

So...you were being too passive?



billiscool
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09 Dec 2012, 12:36 am

yellowtamarin wrote:
billiscool wrote:
MCalavera wrote:
Guys, maybe the OP really did do something majorly stupid that was the pure reason for her to leave him.

What did you do to her, man? Tell us. :P

I was an idiot. at times I was rude and act like a douchebag. here a woman who wanted to be with me, told me she loved me, and I was only the man for her, and I act like an idiot. I had a woman and I screwed it up. just my luck, here a woman who want to do everything for me, want to be with me, and I f---k up. And now Im just a some single guy with no gf.

if a woman ever tell you she love you, say it back and act like it too. Don't be stupid and make her leave.

So...you were being too passive?


no, that not the reason. what up with this passive thing. she left me because she didn't believe I loved her. and I should had told her I loved her.
but I just said dumb things and act like an idiot. we do thing in life we regret and how I act around her near the end of our relationship is something I will always regret.