Oh dear!

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If he comes in smelling like he hasn't showered in a while, you could try telling him outright that all he has to do to be in your league is to regularly shower... It's a simple goal, easily understood and achieved.

This is an encouraging story.

Ask the right question?

Find out if it's a problem he has that goes beyond simple not taking a shower - find out if he doesn't have access to a bathroom regularly or if his laundry machine is broken or if he's staying at someones house and cant take a shower every day.

If you jump in with the - 'you should shower more' first you might find out that he's having a hard time outside of work right now.

Inquire where he's living - but if his situation is normal, you gotta let him know. If I had a friend who was stank all the time, I'd tell him. I've told co workers in the past and they actually thanked me for telling them rather than just talking s**t about them behind their backs.

The whole shower gel/soap on his desk thing is a sophomoric prank and will lead to bad feelings, might get the point across but it will make him feel much much worse than if someone just simply tells him

Well, the card - he wished me Merry Christmas & Happy New Year, and said he hoped to see me in the New Year, though he wouldn't wish our workplace on anyone! (Joke, it's not quite that bad!) It had a picture of two teddy bears holding hands and watching Santa's sleigh fly though the sky under the moons & stars. Quite romantic! Though I was joking with him this week that I was surprised he didn't stick a Starship Enterprise on there as well, and he said he didn't know if I'd appreciate it or not. But he looked pleased that I would have!

I missed a chance on Friday though, it was my birthday on Saturday and I didn't mention it to him. I should have and seen whether he took the initiative and asked to go somewhere and do something. Doh! I didn't have anything planned as it's the same every year, no-one is paid until next weekend, everyone is poor, everyone has colds, the weather is awful and no-one leaves the house if they don't have to. So I always celebrate a week or two later as it's a waste of time organising anything for the weekend itself.

The few people in the office who did know were making lewd jokes about what Trekkie Guy would like to give me for my birthday though! Seems our attempts at flirting have been noticed.

And I found out what the stink issue was all about. He goes to the gym before work and was saying that half the time the showers don't work. Seems this week they have been ok, but I said all the gym users should complain to the management and threaten to go elsewhere. He said it is really embarrassing coming to work unwashed and he knows he stinks... so there we go, he's not a slob & it's an easily solvable problem.

He's a nice guy, he's really grown on me!

You know, there is absolutely nothing wrong with the female making the first move - I do it all the time, and with good results

GO FOR IT!! !! !! !! !! !

Just ask him to go out for a coffee or something. Not the movies. Movies is bad.

^^^^^^With the right person (i.e. nerds/geeks) a movie is a good idea. Just make sure you can go someplace afterwards to chat or get dinner. My ideal first date is dinner, then movie, then a bar to chat for a little while afterwards if things are going well.

I'm not really into films, I don't have the concentration span for sitting in a cinema for 2 hours. But it looks like I might have to get into Star Trek films!

There is a big comic books and assorted geekery shop near our work, so a wander round there followed by dinner & a few drinks would be a nice after-work date.

So it looks like it is up to me to suggest going, Trekkie Guy is so shy he'll never make the first move and I don't want yet another situation where a braver lady gets in first and I'm left wishing it were me. Story of my life.

And I'm working there again on Monday! Time to be brave!