"Nice Guys of OK Cupid" Website

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http://niceguysofokc.tumblr.com/

"hello i'm nice i'm such a nice guy i do not understand why girls don't like me it must be because i'm too nice yes that is definitely it there couldn't possibly be another reason oh man maybe i should just become an a**hole to stop myself being friendzoned i'm so nice i'm sick of all these f*****g b*****s choosing a**holes over me they're so shallow the stupid whores
um"

I wonder if anyone off WP is on this site?

Notice how NONE of those guys are objectively attractive-looking.

I wouldn't tend to hold that against them though, it's just the humour of them making out they're
'nice' when they hold such hard-line views

Some of their replies to the moderator/owner of the site are very amusing
- they certainly aren't being very nice! lol

When "Nice Guys" fight back!
http://niceguysofokc.tumblr.com/tagged/anons

I didn't mean that an insult towards them, as I'm not attractive looking either. I just thought it was weird how EVERY SINGLE GUY on there is, at best, average looking. No "movie-star" looking guys or anything. Almost like this person purposefully singled them out and made it seem like the handsome guys don't do this type of thing.

Nobody would be very nice if their profile was posted online and berated by someone they didn't know, honestly. I know I wouldn't be. Nice doesn't equal doormat.

Well, in my opinion, the very reason a lot of people have to sell themselves on their 'niceness' is due to not having the looks to do it instead ie if you're stunningly good looking you don't have to use being 'nice' as a calling card - the looks do it for you.

So that explains the lack of standard good looks in evidence on the site and I agree that it's not a nice thing the site owner has done but she(?) is making a valid point when asking what their definition of 'nice' is, as from their answers to the questions they don't seem to be very tolerant at all.

I didn't open the link and your quote in your initial post says everything I need to know about why these guys can't get dates. They already showed a complete lack of respect for women. And here they are bitching and moaning that people don't give them a chance? I think what I am reading itself is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

Edit- Not only that, but calling women "whores" and "f*****g b*****s" in itself screams out to women "Omg, this guy will abuse me."

I don't get what's so bad about not being ok with your partner seeing his/her ex alone?

Yes I agree on that one - many people would feel unhappy about it

I'm not sure if that is an actual quote from a 'nice guy' or if it's the site owner giving the gist of the type of attitudes they are focusing on.

Attractiveness is inherently subjective.

I've heard of some nice guys getting frustrated before and flipping out and making such comments. It won't matter at that point who they are. It takes a long time to build up a level of comfort and establish rapport with any women, but all it takes is one second to destroy it all.

I agree

When people are on dating sites and on dates they are on their 'best behaviour' ie trying to put on an impressive act ie they aren't really being their true selves - they are trying to project a winning persona. People usually give away what they are really like though via what they talk about and the way they talk about it. For example, if a man (or woman) doesn't have a good word to say about any of their ex partners - that's a bad sign.

And I can almost assure you that comparing a current person unfavoroubly to an ex tells me a few things as well about the bad qualities the current person has. But if there are no bad qualities or the good far outweights the bad, the truth is: they might still be in love with the ex.

Some of those posts there are funny and I admit that all of them sound idiots and ret*ds but...

The owner is nitpicking things in order to prove all those guys as false nice guys.


For example, in one post she ( or he but most probably a she) quotes a guy claiming he's a nice guy then she quotes him saying that homosexuality is a sin in order to prove that he's not nice; he's not considered nice according to secular/atheist wavelengths of thinking (like mine) but I knew many many many girls who are as homophobes and, for them, that won't disapprove the niceness of this guy.

I live in a relatively religious country, and I can assure you, most girls here would prefer a homophobe guy than a pro-gay rights straight guy (because the latter would be seen as 'weird' or 'worse' a gay himself).

The problem of homophobia is far more complex than niceness/jerkiness, some people can be genuinely nice and can still be homophobes.


Also she nitpicked on one guy for answering 'yes' that women have to shave their legs. I personally don't believe anyone should be obliged in anything but I don't think that alone would disprove his niceness; I can bet that most girls would say 'yes' for that guys *must* shave their beard and cut their hairs, and many would say yes to shaving chest and body hair. Those answers simply express preferences (and narrow thinking maybe) but I don't think they reflect lack of niceness.

Last edited by The_Face_of_Boo on 02 Jan 2013, 5:52 pm, edited 3 times in total.

No, not totally subjective.

Not every individual is his own species.

Its a joke site - surely? There are guys out there like this? My word O_O