I think some on here should give this a try.
Howdy! It has been awhile since I posted, but I am doing quite well. Anyways, I have been trying to improve myslef, and trying to build an online income. But cut through the chase, I have had good success with online dating in Asia, and chatting with girls that are not money grubbers. Kt is amazing how open and accesible they are! I say yous should give it a try! Every since I found my cutey, I have not been down in the relationship blues, and have overall been upbeat. I highly suggest you check them out on sites like hi5. Best of luck!
You think the people getting tricked by what you call "money grubbers" do so knowingly?
There's a big internettrade in women, often from Russia or Thailand etc, under the guise of "internet dating".
I don't suggest any lovelorn, naive aspie getting on sites set up like that...
Of course that is different than an ordinary datingsite just located in one of the countries famous for sites like that, but any site advertising "Meet women from XYZ! WIFE FOR YOU" = bad news.
I agree. All I was saying was sites like facebook, hi5, friendster, etc. Goign through a formal "dating" agency would be a horrible idea. An dusually, it would probably be better not to accept random offers out of the blue. So please understand, I was reffering mostly to things like facebook,
Tyri0n
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I have some experience living in two Asian countries. I would imagine my take on the situation might be helpful.
1. You don't know they are not money grubbers or visa seekers. Particularly avoid the Philippines and Russia like the plague (sorry to be prejudiced, but unless you actually live there, and can read people, you're taking a huge risk).
2. Asian culture is more tolerant of social anxiety/shyness/geekiness/feminine traits in men.
3. It's not fair to the girl unless you actually live there for awhile and let her spend time with you in person to see if she actually likes you.
4. Women don't like coarse sexual perverts regardless of which country they are from. Asian women are taught to be more delicate, more inhibited, and expect even more than Western women to be treated with respect. Make a sexual move on a girl, and you're going to jail. In Chinese culture, women, not men, are expected to make the first sexual move in a relationship. Some Western women actually appreciate sexual perverts with coarse language and behavior while almost no Chinese or Korean (not sure about Japan) women will. This can work against many aspie guys.
5. Women in many Asian countries are used to a skewed gender ratio, so even if they are willing to lower their standards somewhat with respect to foreigners, they are still incredibly demanding in relationships. In some Southern and Western provinces (e.g. Chengdu), it is even customary for women to beat their husbands and boyfriends, and the guy is supposed to just take it. While it's very easy to get a Chinese girlfriend, women in China are used to having far more power in the dating world than are Western women, thanks to China's history of gender-specific abortions, and so they are more demanding.
6. In China, and Korea to a lesser extent, a girl's parents will expect you to be a home owner and have a good job. Japan, from what I hear, is more forgiving from an economic standpoint while Southeast Asia considers just about every Westerner to be rich.
Appreciate the insight. It was one of those were things where we just hit it off, and now we a really close. I am not saying she is or isn't, but we have been speaking for like 6months and I have hear dmum on finances and moving to the us. And when I asked, she said whereever. But then again, there is always a chance. I agree also you should go to home turf, which I am working on, as soon as my finances are up. I just think that there is opportunity to be had, but you have to avoid obvious fakes, and give it time. But I am not N expert by no means. Just sharing what I have heard and learned.
Last edited by zacb on 27 Mar 2013, 12:34 am, edited 1 time in total.
Tyri0n
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Which country if I may ask?
Tyri0n
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Some of those girls are expert con-artists. I dated one who conned me when I was young and stupid 5 years ago and living in South Korea, and she messaged me on FB last week after 4 years of no contact asking for money. Yes, some of them are that brazen. I blocked her.
The good ones are much less obvious.
Here's a good test: What is your profession? Why don't you suggest that you live with her in the Philippines rather than her coming to the U.S? Then do it for a year or so. If she is ok with this, then she might be genuine. If she insists on living in the U.S., then she is likely a con artist.
The Philippines is FULL of female con artists. Saying "be careful" is likely too mild.
FYI, almost everyone in the Philippines attends church of some sort. It doesn't make them religious or mean they have good values. It's kind of an institutional/social thing there rather than a sign of commitment like it is in the U.S. My ex-gf went to church twice a week but was still a slut, a con artist, and a cocaine/meth user. I regret that I did some of these with her. Definitely young and stupid.
Tyri0n, I agree with what you say, and a word of warning concerning situations like that is appropriate. However using "Do you want to live in the US?" as a litmus test is a bit faulty... In case you've missed it, it is one of the richest countries on earth with great PR. Even honest people from poorer countries would have reasons to want that. SO maybe that in combination with other questions...
A lot of the women in the Philippines have been abused. Many Asian women do not want to be in a long term sexual relationship that is not marriage. Some will do it to "get there" but it is rarely desired and some out right won't. Ironically a lot of the Southeast Asian women Filipino included stay with their husbands even if they "used" them to live in the USA. Some get attached, some like the "american spouse" status symbol, some don't really care either way and staying married (usually more pluses to stay).
Also we all know how many "love" marriages fail. Good luck!
_________________
Aspie score 159 of 200
nt score 46 of 200
I have some experience living in two Asian countries. I would imagine my take on the situation might be helpful.
1. You don't know they are not money grubbers or visa seekers. Particularly avoid the Philippines and Russia like the plague (sorry to be prejudiced, but unless you actually live there, and can read people, you're taking a huge risk).
2. Asian culture is more tolerant of social anxiety/shyness/geekiness/feminine traits in men.
3. It's not fair to the girl unless you actually live there for awhile and let her spend time with you in person to see if she actually likes you.
4. Women don't like coarse sexual perverts regardless of which country they are from. Asian women are taught to be more delicate, more inhibited, and expect even more than Western women to be treated with respect. Make a sexual move on a girl, and you're going to jail. In Chinese culture, women, not men, are expected to make the first sexual move in a relationship. Some Western women actually appreciate sexual perverts with coarse language and behavior while almost no Chinese or Korean (not sure about Japan) women will. This can work against many aspie guys.
5. Women in many Asian countries are used to a skewed gender ratio, so even if they are willing to lower their standards somewhat with respect to foreigners, they are still incredibly demanding in relationships. In some Southern and Western provinces (e.g. Chengdu), it is even customary for women to beat their husbands and boyfriends, and the guy is supposed to just take it. While it's very easy to get a Chinese girlfriend, women in China are used to having far more power in the dating world than are Western women, thanks to China's history of gender-specific abortions, and so they are more demanding.
6. In China, and Korea to a lesser extent, a girl's parents will expect you to be a home owner and have a good job. Japan, from what I hear, is more forgiving from an economic standpoint while Southeast Asia considers just about every Westerner to be rich.
Good to hear Japan is more forgiving. Thanks for this post.
So is dating someone in another country as good a prospect for Aspie women? I'm having a hard time thinking of a situation where this would work for females, even in the case of someone wanting a visa.
_________________
"My personal tragedy will not interfere with my ability to do good hair." - Steel Magnolias
Your neurodiverse (Aspie) score: 159 of 200
Your neurotypical (non-autistic) score: 75 of 200
You are very likely neurodiverse (Aspie)
Tyri0n
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Joined: 24 Nov 2012
Age: 37
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Location: Douchebag Capital of the World (aka Washington D.C.)
Tyri0n
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Joined: 24 Nov 2012
Age: 37
Gender: Male
Posts: 2,879
Location: Douchebag Capital of the World (aka Washington D.C.)
Please do tell. What is the ide abehind that?
http://www.stem-cell-regeneration.com/about
Do remember that one just like this was shut down in Germany for killing somebody.
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