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Alynn
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01 May 2013, 11:11 pm

Or rather, next to each other. ;)

My guy usually cannot fall asleep next to me. Any sort of movement or noise on my behalf distracts him and keeps him from sleeping. This even includes my breathing at times. Swallowing or any sort of noise with my mouth completely wakes him up.

He has managed to fall asleep a few times when we were both pretty worn out, but never anything longer than a half hour or so.

I was curious to see if anyone else experiences this with their partners who have Asperger's. It seems like it might be common, considering how hypersensitive aspie's can be to sensory input, but, I dunno.



Pabalebo
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01 May 2013, 11:14 pm

It takes me a long time to fall asleep next to someone, but once I do, I can usually sleep through the night.


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Kjas
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01 May 2013, 11:23 pm

Alynn wrote:
Or rather, next to each other. ;)

My guy usually cannot fall asleep next to me. Any sort of movement or noise on my behalf distracts him and keeps him from sleeping. This even includes my breathing at times. Swallowing or any sort of noise with my mouth completely wakes him up.

He has managed to fall asleep a few times when we were both pretty worn out, but never anything longer than a half hour or so.

I was curious to see if anyone else experiences this with their partners who have Asperger's. It seems like it might be common, considering how hypersensitive aspie's can be to sensory input, but, I dunno.


:lmao:

That used to be me all over.
It used to be so bad that I would just wait until they had fallen asleep, get up, and go and sleep on the couch, every single time.
Needless to say - the said partner at the time never appreciate this. :razz:

I have since found, if it's the right person (this is key point number one), that I can sleep next to them, if they are hugging me or otherwise intertwined in a way that puts pressure on me (key point number 2). It's easiest for me that way because at that point I'm on their chest so their heartbeat is the loudest thing, as it's right next to my ear, and is very soothing and constant, this combined with the pressure which is very important - I fall asleep in 5-10 minutes like this.


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MjrMajorMajor
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02 May 2013, 12:46 am

Nope. I'm a restless sleeper, and my husband wakes up if a pin drops. I don't mind it most of the time, but I miss falling asleep being held.



heatherbk
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02 May 2013, 1:54 am

Kjas wrote:
I have since found, if it's the right person (this is key point number one), that I can sleep next to them


Yes



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02 May 2013, 4:05 am

While me and Makayla live approximately 12 hours away, and thus haven't actually made any physical contact, I would hope we would be able to :3


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02 May 2013, 2:56 pm

The sound of snoring does something to my brain that sets off a murderous rage but if I fall asleep before the sawmill starts up, I can stay asleep.


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mikassyna
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02 May 2013, 3:13 pm

When my husband I first met, he could have stuck me with pins at night and I would have stayed next to him in bliss. However, 9 years later...

1) I cannot tolerate any of his limbs on me (legs). I feel too asymmetrical and lopsided and uncomfortable.
2) I cannot tolerate any of his limbs underneath me (arm). I feel too asymmetrical and it is uncomfortable.
3) I cannot tolerate his breath mixing with my breath. I feel like I will not get enough oxygen if I breathe in what he breathes out.
4) I cannot tolerate his snoring. Chainsaws in my ears. Enough said.
5) I cannot tolerate his television show sounds I hear next to his wireless headphones. He cannot sleep without TV, which is bizarre to me. I make him turn down volume to barely anything.
6) I cannot tolerate too much of his body heat. I am like a furnace and he is always freezing. He has to keep far away from me or make sure the A/C is blasting so I have the right temperature regulation. We argue over this constantly.

I have to spoon him from behind, like he's my big teddy bear. That's the only way it will work.



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02 May 2013, 5:07 pm

With my last girlfriend I absolutely adored falling asleep intertwined with her, and I think it was the same for her.



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02 May 2013, 9:46 pm

Yes, I sleep better together with her, it's awesome. :)


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02 May 2013, 10:21 pm

I reckon it depends on how bad the Asperger person's sensory sensitivity is, and what senses are most affected. I happen to have fairly strong tactile sensitivity and I am unable to sleep if any part of my body (even a single finger or toe) is in contact with another person's body, unless I happen to be extremely exhausted (but even then it's restless sleep and generally short lived; 1 - 2 hours at best). I can share a bed with somebody and sleep fine so long as no body parts are touching and that person is a quiet sleeper (my auditory sensitivity isn't as strong as tactile sensitivity, plus I'm on medication that puts me to sleep so sounds don't tend to wake me these days).


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02 May 2013, 11:12 pm

If I am to sleep while hugging someone, it must be the right person. Otherwise I'll be too self-conscious and won't be able to fall asleep.

On the other hand, I can sleep just fine if no touching is expected from me; in that case I can just ignore the other person.


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03 May 2013, 1:45 am

It is harder to fall asleep with someone else. I need to have my pillows, my blankets, my limbs, and the other person all arranged just so. And she doesn't always go along with that.

Damn her for thinking she gets to decide for herself what position she sleeps in. I mean really, what's next? Is she gonna start thinking she can choose what she eats for breakfast? Or wears to work?

But I love waking up with her. When she's the very first thing I see in the morning, it makes my whole day.



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03 May 2013, 5:28 am

No, I can't fall asleep easily w/ my partner.

He snores and he is like a space heater burning one side of my body. The a/c needs to be on to keep us from burning up and it is noisy. I also have mikassyna's issue w/ lopsidedness. Spooning is difficult for us, he is short and fat making it hard for him to spoon me, and I can't stand his hair in my face when I spoon him. We both have a little trouble w/ the space restriction. We are sprawlers.

I am used to insomnia, and w/ him I feel safe and his mattress is 10x more comfortable than mine. so it makes up for some of it.


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03 May 2013, 10:10 am

Considering I wake up at a pin drop and am a chronic sprawler (along with being one of WPs all time tallest members), I find it very difficult to share my bed. As much as I enjoy it I simply cannot get a good night's sleep unless I have alone. Unfortunately, the GF loves to sleep with me so this always creates conflict. Further compounding the problem is that she is always cold and I like to sleep in cold conditions and MUST have heavy blankets even in the summer.



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03 May 2013, 10:48 am

When I loved my ex yes,than later he snored, but I can't complain because if I'm on my back,I snore(my nose has been broke twice)but I have problems sleeping ,so any noise,like a person walking on the floor wakes me up.Or if it's hot and sticky.And I roll around a lot in my sleep,it may bother someone else.My ex slept like a rock.But sometimes after sex,it was heaven to go to sleep cuddled up.And I like to sleep cold,the window open,maybe a fan running, with lots of blankets,pillows(sometimes I put a pillow over part of my head)and I admit,two big stuffed animals.


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