I Want To Know What Love Is

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I'm not sure how to start this so I guess I'll just dig right in.

I want to know the experience of loving someone. I want to know what it's like to hold her hand walking down the sidewalk on a sunny day. I see it all the time and just once I'd like it to happen to me. I want to know what it's like to wake up in the middle of the night and see your partner lying there next to you knowing that that is where she wants to be and nowhere else knowing that I feel the same about her.
I want to know what it's like to steal a quick kiss under a tree in the woods.

I am 37 and have never had so much as a first date. No female of my acquaintance has every looked at me in that way. I don't think I'm unattractive. ( I mean, I 've seen worse than me) I won't describe myself here - I've already done that in the Odd Bod - Single Aspies thread. I am the second to last entry at last check. Go look - I'll wait.

Okay you're back. good. So now you know more about me. I feel that I have a lot of good qualities. I think that I am a very thoughtful person. I think that I have a great capacity for love. Here's a poem a wrote last year:

Hold On

When you think you’re alone in the dark,
And you think that there’s no one who cares,
When you think you’ve come to the end of your rope,
Hold on,
Hold on.

When you feel you can’t catch your breath,
And you think that you’re going under,
When you think you’re headed down the waterfall,
Hold on,
Hold on,
Hold on tight.

When you think that you can’t carry on,
And you think you’re down for the count,
When you think you’ve fallen and can’t stand any more,
Hold on,
Hold on,
Hold on tight to me.

‘Cause you’re not alone and there’s someone who cares,
I’ll cut you some slack and give you the breath you need,
You can grab on my hand as you float by,
Hop on my back and I’ll carry you away,
And all you’ve got to do is hold on,
Hold on,
Hold on tight to me.

Michael Stitt

So you see I think I know what love should or could be. I have other love poems like this as well, but this is my favourite. And I have to tell you I would do those things in the last stanza.

I feel that I am loyal, trustworthy and kind. I know an all the time serious looking face (which I know I have) isn't going to attract the opposite sex, in fact, it might even scare them off I suppose. I don't know. Maybe that's my problem. Smiling just isn't natural to me, and when I do try, it feels sort of fake.

Bottom line is, I'm just tired of being lonely and I am looking for companionship, be it love or friend.

So what do I do?

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=loWXMtjUZWM[/youtube]

I'm sorry lol, the thread title. You say that you've never been on a first date, how many women have you asked out? Have you tried online dating? Have you sought therapy at all? In my experience the biggest hindrance for guys (myself included) in dating is actually asking people out for the first time. That's the hardest part, but also the most critical, because unless you do it then nothing will happen.

And I wanted to add,but when I write on internet,I have so many things to say and I often forget to say everything I wanted.If someone doesn`t expirience real love in his/her life,it is not because he/she is a bad person.It is because they are very few people who are capable to love sincerily.Dating is treated like shopping,here is a topic about it.Many people don`t know what they do with themselves,how they will know what they do with another person?Many people are egoist and are not interested in another`s problems.Many people are superficial,and they only use dating to make themselves popular.Do you want to be with woman like that?Or do you want to be with a girl who is good and who loves your personal qualities?That woman would not be rejected by the fact you are strange,aspie and whatnot.She would accept you.If you find her,excellent.If you don`t find her,world will not end .

Well said, amapola!! What you said just now exactly describes the very kind of woman I am willing to wait for, one who will TRULY love me and not for superficial reasons. And will love me just the way I am.

To Stargazer: LOL is right. The title is corny, but I grew up in the eighties with that music and it was the first thing I came up with. And yes asking is the hard part. I've never had the courage to do it. I know it's what I have to do in my head, it's the actual doing that's hard. Yes, there were one or two girls I could have asked way back in my school days, but I never felt like I was good enough to ask. I didn't have a job then, I didn't drive a car (still don't) and no money (still don't as I just lost my job) and just felt like I'd be laughed at.


To Amapola; Those are nice words and something to consider. You have the benefit of only being 19 with your whole life ahead of you yet to work things out, which I'm sure you will, whereas I am 37 and very nearly at the half way point of my life (at least it feels that way) and haven't done a thing. I am still hopeful I will find that good woman. Maybe my joining here is the first step. I would indeed rather wait for a good woman who loves me for me. I just hope she's out there. They say every person has a soulmate.

Also thanks for liking the poem. I wish it were a song. I see it as being a piano based Eagles song with Don Henly on lead vocals and the Eagles five point harmonies when it gets to the "Hold on" parts, and a Joe Walsh lead acoustic guitar bit after the third stanza. (Going to see these guys on July 11th at the Air Canada Centre. This is where having someone to go with would have been nice, but oh well, I digress.) Good luck to you.

I really don't get it either really doesn't make sense. I love this website though: http://www.brainpickings.org/index.php/ ... edrickson/

I view love as happiness associated with being with a person on a very profound level.

By the way, what constitutes as a friend? I often here it is a person you are willing to share personal information with, but no information about my life feels personal to me (I almost completely lack the emotion of shame).

You realize it’s personal when people start doing nasty things with it.