Net-dating - NEED HELP

Post Reply New Topic

OK, I finally established communication to a girl via the internet.
That is, I started out by writing an IM asking if she wanted to write with me, and she replied and asked if I have an image of myself (she has one of herself, and I am not the person who is going to reveal myself online).

It is not because I think I am ugly. My mom has told me I am... cute.

Anyway, let us suppose I send her a photo of myself, then what do I tell her?

I don't know what to write. I'm feeling like I am in a very difficult or at least, very new world.

It's like I don't know the programming language, and is going to learn it. So, what do I do now?
How do I establish more contact to her?

I am completely inexperienced.

Well, first of all, telling the truth is of paramount importance. Lies will only come back to bite you in the ass in the end, so don't go telling her you're an astronaut or a secret agent if you sell televisions at Best Buy.

Second of all, tell her about yourself, but don't overdo it. Being self-deprecating will help a little, as long as you don't make out like you actively enjoy putting yourself down (certainly, between the guy who's full of himself and the guy who can see the funny side of who he is, the guy who's got more time for the mirror in the men's room than for his date will lose out).

Thirdly, make sure to ask her about herself when you're done giving her the basics on you. That way you're stimulating a conversation because you're essentially saying "But enough about me, let's talk about you." It shows you're interested, and you want to hear more about her. If you can connect something she's done to something you've done, then you can create a discussion that way ("You went to Niagra Falls? No way! I went there last year and really enjoyed it - what did you think?"), and that's even better.

Fourthly, know your boundaries, and adjust your small talk accordingly. For instance, a joke that may sound hilarious to your male friends may well come across as crass and/or insensitive to a woman. So it's best to skip those entirely.

Your job is to engage in an emotional or rapport style, do not talk in terms of things from the "god" perspective... talk in terms of *I* or first person perspective. It's not the activities that matter, its the experiences and emotions you share with one another.

You dont have to have the same interests, you need to connect on the *feelings* of how things make you feel. You really need to get a copy of Double Your Dating, and a copy of the Venusian arts handbook. Both of which you can find online through Limewire (P2P) or that other website.... piratebay.org

You really need to understand why you socialize in the first place, so the venusian arts handbook is critical for you to read.

Maybe I SHOULD lie to her, and tell her I sell televisions at Best Buy, instead of telling her the truth, that is I do not work and recieve Early Retirement income because I am mentally disabled.

Everybody lies, but if you lie about things and your relationship gets serious that hurts you. You can lie if it is short term or friends with benefits. You just have to be careful what you lie about... EVERYONE lies and girls lie the most by the way.