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KingofKaboom
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06 Jan 2014, 4:12 am

If you want to tell a woman how you feel don't box her in and make her tell you right away, especially if she's leaving a relationship. I don't know if I had a chance but I know if I ever did have one I ruined it. We we're really good friends and my aspie nature made us fight sometimes. But she made me so happy just spending time with her even though it was all online. We could talk for hours and she never made me feel bad because I'm weird or I spammed her. I was so scared of ruining that friendship when my feelings changed for her. I was so scared I demanded a yes or no answer right away. She couldn't give me one, it ate at me for months. In the end I've ruined the friendship too. I should have told her how I felt and asked her to tell me how she felt. I should have waited until she left her boyfriend. I should have waited until she could give me an answer without being forced into it. The answer may not have changed but I could have gotten an honest answer.


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em_tsuj
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06 Jan 2014, 4:34 am

Sorry to hear about this.



KingofKaboom
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06 Jan 2014, 4:36 am

Now I can never know if she felt anything. Loves someone else now, all I'll get now is never's and no's.


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Deuterium
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06 Jan 2014, 1:22 pm

Another risk you can run into if you 'jump' on someone who is just ending a relationship is that they may (intentionally or not) use you as a rebound, which may be doomed from the start, if the relationship isn't based so much on liking you as it is avoiding the hurt of breaking up with the last person (which can hurt you and make you feel like nothing more than a temporary, convenient distraction, in the end).



KingofKaboom
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06 Jan 2014, 3:00 pm

Yeah I know that, I was going to wait a while after to ask again. I'm not in person so I'm not very compelling and usually I wait to long. Seems it's about a month give or a week.


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accountinglad
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07 Jan 2014, 3:52 am

Tell her sharpish or some other dude will pick her up



coffeebean
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07 Jan 2014, 10:27 am

Deuterium wrote:
Another risk you can run into if you 'jump' on someone who is just ending a relationship is that they may (intentionally or not) use you as a rebound, which may be doomed from the start, if the relationship isn't based so much on liking you as it is avoiding the hurt of breaking up with the last person (which can hurt you and make you feel like nothing more than a temporary, convenient distraction, in the end).


Yeah, most people aren't in a position to start fresh immediately after breaking up. It hurts and may take time to adjust, and those emotions don't simply vanish.