What's this thing called a "spark"?

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I've never had that ever in my life. Anytime I had a liking for someone, it was always a result of gradually getting used to her face, liking the look, and enjoying her company (no drama and no hassles). And that's all it took for me to want to be intimate with someone (emotionally, sexually, whatever).

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yy5THitqPBw[/youtube]

Yes, I feel struck with awe when I spot a really attractive woman, but it's not really a determinant for me to want to be intimate with that person. If anything, I'm more likely to just be satisfied with admiring her looks and then when I'm done admiring, go my way.

Sounds like a fear of commitment to me.

As for the "spark", I've most often heard it described as a connection that goes beyond the physical and emotional, to an extent neither party wants to be separated for very long in any circumstance.

I've used the term 'spark' to mean that the other person elicits a strong, positive emotion in me such that I want to be intimate with them. This is different from feeling comfortable, (eg: I snuggle into my bed alone and can feel quite comfortable). So I'd call you wanting to be intimate with someone a spark.
I've never had what I think of as an instant connection with someone, although I guess I'd also use it to mean 'love at first sight', which is when you look at each other and you both feel a strong physical connection I guess.
I could see someone who doesn't have strong personal walls letting someone in emotionally who they may only be physically attracted to I suppose. Either that or just a very sociable person who likes most people would be more likely to feel a sort of instant spark.

It's love at first sight.

It stings when you feel it.

Like a wasp sting but there will be no wasp, neither a sting.

Ontopic: spark means what creates the connection between 2 people that can be considered to be the "love and lust" type of connection from what I gather.

I think it's similar as "feeling butterflies in the stomach" which is what they say here when someone feels deeply in love (and probably also lust) with someone else.

The word is a reference to striking a flint to start a fire. It"sparks" - ignites a flame, as in a romantic passion.

It's pretty much the same as saying that you "hit it off," except in a coquettish (flirtatious), romantic sense, rather than just a friendly one.


Often happens when one "goes a-courtin'" and often leads to "pitching woo." But you don't know what those things mean, either, do you?

Can't start a fire without a spark...

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=129kuDCQtHs[/youtube]

I think it's that moment when you realise this person is more to you than anyone else is and you've made a deeper connection with them than with other people. It's only happened a few times for me.

It happens for me in conversation when I realise and he realises that we understand each other, that we have something we can relate to in each other and it's safe to be ourselves.

One was with a guy who wasn't available and that moment was more like an "oh, no! how did this happen?" We just clicked and the next time I saw him after that he was really awkward with me and I knew he'd felt it too. Then it was awkward for a long time till I drew the line and stopped talking to him. He was very painful to let go of.

Last time was when I was talking to someone I've known each for years, we just went down a road of conversation we've never been down before and I honestly looked at him and thought, "Oh, so this is what I've been looking for." I was feeling hurt about something and I explained it to him expecting him not to understand at all, but he did and was very supportive and I started to see something good in him that I'd never been allowed to see before because he had hidden it under a mask of protection and stand-offishness and I got to see him for the first time as he really is and he got to see me as I really am and it was ok. I mean, we didn't recoil in horror at the revelations of self, it was good rather than bad. Most people feel like a wall to me and I talk to them and I don't feel anything. So this was good. I didn't feel frustrated talking to him because he understood.

A spark is a peculiar variety of personal chemistry, sometimes based on physical attraction to begin with, but usually going much deeper than that. It can arise instantly, or take some kindling to establish itself. You feel that you hit it off with the other person on so many levels that it feels unreal. You respond overwhelmingly positively to each other in person.

Sometimes it leads to a romantic relationship, sometimes to an intense friendship, and sometimes it leads nowhere at all (but leaves you with a long-lasting 'what if...?' memory)

The spark either happens or it doesn't - it can come from something simple like the physical look of someone, or a fleeing and connecting conversation. It could also be something deeper like after dates and/or sexual encounters.

Either which way when you do feel it, it is good to be honest and open with your feelings or it can become awful very quickly.

Hmm, I think that latest spark I though I saw has failed to ignite and has now smouldered to nothing. Sometimes a spark is just a little flash in a moment when you feel like you've made a connection with someone. Sometimes it can be a false alarm. Other times it turns into something more.

I think a spark is a moment where you are suddenly very interested in the other person and they are suddenly interested in you and you feel like you are attracted to each other and want to spend more time together because you've both realised that you like each other alot more than you like anyone else and you want to see if you can continue with the relationship and gain more happiness from each other's company.

High-energy electrons ionising the gas around them, causing both spectral and 'grey-body' radiation...
Oh, wait thats probably not what you meant

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kgnXZopKTqI[/youtube]

Can't beat the original.

As to the "spark", it's like pornography; it can't really be defined, but you'll know it when you see/feel it.