list some traits to look for in NTs that make them suitable

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for an AS partner.

So we can't all find AS partners, it's likely a lot of us will end up in relationships with NTs. With that in mind what are some traits to look for that would show the NT could handle one of us?

Thanks

What might be suitable for me might be totally wrong for you, and something that might suit both of us might be a nightmare to someone else. It's just like anything else, it all depends on the two individuals involved.

Patience, but I think that is something that everyone needs regardless of whether they are an aspie or NT.

I was going to say patience, and yes, I agree it's something just about everyone could do with a bit more of.

For anyone posting... I would hope there would be an understanding of introvert vs extrovert. Seems plenty of people on here describe NT as socially outgoing.

Are you saying introverts and extroverts should seek out a partner in kind?


I do think an extrovert would just get bored of me.

Why do you say that (get bored of you)?

What I am pointing out is that there are major differences between the two.
Extroverts are people who like to talk a lot and gain their energy from being in social situations and they can go with the flow on a whim. They are usually more quick-witted and fast acting. Confident extroverts know and understand this about themselves. They may not understand introverted people very much and believe what motivates them should motivate introverts the same way.

Introverts gain energy from down time and planning things out, but generally know how to talk and listen. Introverts are usually more intellectual and looking for meaningful conversation. They are able to listen to the extroverts and are more confident and comfortable only speaking up when they need to, rather than just to keep with the flow. A confident introvert is likely a better problem solver as well as they don't like to make decisions and solve problems on the fly.

There there are those who try and be extroverted even though they are not. They inevitably crash and burn.

because



Maybe nto all of them but enough of them that I get really tired of talking to them. All they ever want to know about me is WHY isn't my life like theirs, because they assume their life is the perfect example of a life well lived.

Sounds like you have met some people who have inflated egos. and you are right... Not all Extroverts are like what I described in what you quoted.

Someone who is able to sense how someone feels and their intentions. I think.

Calmness--my NT relationships have worked best when the other person is calm by nature. This doesn't mean they're an introvert, it merely means that they're emotionally stable.

^ this

I've worked out I need to be around people who are laid back and not emotionally demanding. Not sure what they'd want with me, but that's another matter.

I'd look for someone who is calm, patient, mostly introverted but a little more extroverted than me (I need someone to pull me out to places from time to time), understanding and bluntly honest.

That's what I look for in an NT.

I've noticed, especially among young people, the perception of some kind of relationship between love and hate.
If they try to love someone and it doesn't work out, they decide to hate them instead for some reason.

Okay, so basically someone who isn't like that.