Being handsome is not good enough.

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I do agree with that quote of her.

I'm not ugly but when I was younger I was considered a catch from the looks I got I guess. Not even old hah... Well whatever it takes more than looks to get a woman and more than that to find one worth keeping.

I've seen it all said, oh I'm attractive and no woman wants me, I have a lot of money, a car and a job yet no woman wants me, and of course the exact opposite, it all comes down to them wanting someone with masculinity and confidence, which, the vast majority of autists lack. Not saying that's true for you, but that's generally the case.

Yet, if he's an extroverted and confident-speaking dork/jerk his success rate is still insanely good despite whatever he looks like.

Fat, pimply-faced aspie reporting in.

WHERE ALL THE WHITE WOMEN AT?

Looks are relevant but only up to a point And of course, they are very subjective too. You might think I am good looking and the other 99% think I am not.

Looks don't matter past the initial phase.

Did these women actually say they think you are a sociopath, or did you just assume it? Have you tried laughing it out or maybe explaining your condition in a lighthearted way?

I think I know what you mean though, minus the look, although I know a lot of people have the misconception that people with AS are usually geeky looking and cannot possibly be minimally attractive. The correlation between beauty and mental health is so negatively associated. That's pure ignorance. However, when people judge someone's actions or behaviour, then I think we can cut them some slack the first time, because not everyone knows about AS and what it entails.

Just this Friday I was talking with a friend, and we were discussing F1. Because I don't watch the news much, I asked if Michael Schumacher had died yet, or was still alive. The person was shocked and said I wasn't being very nice. But imo, I asked a perfectly logical question. I didnt insinuate I wanted him dead or alive. Last I heard, he was in a coma, gravely ill, so my question was based on that. I had to explain myself. I get misunderstood *a lot*.

This is why it's exhausting. Not because of the way we look, but because of how our brains work.

And here I was thinking that wondering how someone is doing was a polite thing.

It's polite to ask how they are doing not if they are dead yet.

I wasn't addressing his relatives, and it wasn't intended to be rude anyway. If someone is seriously ill and you first hear it's not likely they will survive, how is it wrong to ask if they have died or are still alive?

I'm actually a very polite person, thank you very much. A lot more well mannered than most people.

If someone here takes offence after I explained the logic, they are just as judgemental and ignorant as some NT's. Actually, even worse, because at least you would have thought that sharing the same condition, would mean a little more understanding.

Not that I care. I know my manners, and thats all that matters to me.

I was responding to the person I quoted.

I do act extroverted and confident-speaking in public, but everybody assumes that I am only after sex.

Don't worry, it isn't everyone. Many might, but they aren't worth your time in the end if they will do that. But I understand this frustration entirely, it can be an overwhelming at times.

I'm good looking (yes I'll say it coz it's true), and in my experience it hasn't paid any dividends.

I'm 39 now, but when I was under 30 all it got me was "wolf whistles" & sexual remarks from both sexes, and now at 39 all it gets me is either being chatted up by women over 50, or gay guys under 25 wanting me to be their "friend with benefits". I guess that the women are looking for a "Son" figure, and the gay guys for an "older brother" or "Father" figure.

I'm not interested in either of the above.

Well this is me. I'm extremely skinny, with no muscles, just skin and bone. I doubt I will ever be fat. I have nice hair and am always clean shaven. I did have a lot of pimples before, though slowly but surely I'm getting them to go away. I'm not sure if there is an aspie look, but even if there was I don't think people can look at me and automatically take a guess at "Hmmm, you know what? That kid looks a little autistic to me."
[img][img]http://imagizer.imageshack.us/v2/640x480q90/34/uzkp.jpg[/img][/img]

I am ugly though, so I wouldn't be sure how enough it is.

You're not ugly at all.