Thinking about giving online Dating a go...

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I'm not sure if this is the right place to put this, but I thought that it was the best place to ask this question...

Like some of my friends (plus the bulk of the users on this site) I am single, a little lonely (but only from time to time) and would like to widen my social circle.

That is not to say that I haven't got any friends, nor is it to say that I haven't had any girlfriends in the past, but in any case I felt that if I used a dating site I could meet new people and maybe meet that special someone.

I have considered starting out on Aspie Affection, but as I have had little experience (although I did used to have a profile there some years ago) with those web sites and then maybe moving on to some of the others.

May I add that I'm not just doing this to find a girlfriend, but rather to widen my social circle and if I find love then that's great, if not then that's OK too.

If anyone can give me good sound advise then it would be much appreciated.

From what I understand, Aspie Affection is a very buggy site without many users. I would recommend giving OKCupid a shot, it is free and has a lot of members. Plus, you can answer questions, and that helps to filter out people that you are wholly incompatible with.

Other than that, there's not much advice to give. Use good grammar, don't reveal any personally identifiable things until after you meet in person and trust the other person, and don't get discouraged when people don't respond or stop responding to you.

OKC is the gold standard. Everything else is either a scam, or just not worth your time.

pleanty of fish is almost as good, and better in somethings then okc. I'm on both and get more messages on pof, not that they lead to dates from either though.

I see nothing bad about online dating. Specially if you have a bit special treats, it seems to be far easier to find explicite people sharing that treat. A friend of mine had the prob, to be very intense in christian believing. Might sound weird for US-people, but around here in europe, it seems a bit strange to the majority of people if you are really intense about your believes, so she is singing in church chorus, does pilgrim-trekking regularly, does her easter holiday in an cloister, ... So, when she went out, from 10 people she met, only 1 would be anyway ok with her intense believe and the according living style, and out of that 1/10 you still need to find the one, that you fall in love in and that additionally returns that love.

While when she was searching for a partner, using a serious dating site (parship), she could focus right on the beginning on people agreeing with that intense believe of her, by simply filtering for it. By doing so she found rather fast (about a year) someone she is now in an relationship with.

I would avoid "dating-homepages" and similar. There are simply so many spammers on it, that serious people dont get mentioned anymore.

Online dating works for some doesn't work for others.

Don't go into it expecting to be rolling in women. For the most part women are highly selective (and when your getting 50+ messages a day who's to blame them.)

Aspie Affection is permanently plagued with technical glitches and bugs. To make matters worse, many of the women's profiles on it look like they are fakes/scammers. (I have never looked at the men's, so I do not know if they are any better.) There are (or were) other dating and friendship websites targeted towards people on the autism spectrum, including http://www.autisticdating.net/ , http://www.aspergersdatingsite.com/ , and http://aspergerworld.com . (Disclaimer. I am not affiliated in any manner with those sites, and I can not vouch for them. Caveat emptor.) There is also a group on Facebook, https://www.facebook.com/groups/aspiedatingtips/ , and one can sometimes find people with autism spectrum disorders on websites for people with disabilities.

There are many other dating websites. For a massive list, along with some reviews, see http://www.alldatingwebsites.com/ . For a smaller list try http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Comparison ... g_websites , or use your favourite search engine.

Dating websites can be grouped into those that are completely free to use, and those that charge a fee to use some of their features. The way free dating websites make money is through advertising. They take the information you provide them about yourself, and pass it along to third party marketing and advertising firms. All of the information you provide them ( http://www.npr.org/blogs/alltechconside ... any-access ). Free dating websites also tend to attract a lot of scammers, spammers, fakes, perverts and jerks (of both genders). A pay-wall screens out many of them, but some of the paid sites are run by unscrupulous people who try all sorts of tricks to get you to pay for their services (such as sending you messages from fake profiles). Before signing up for any dating website, I strongly recommend you search for, and read, reviews of the site.

Some of the dating websites contain free advice about the process of online dating, and you can find more information elsewhere on the web (e.g. "Online Dating Service How To: The Basics of Online Dating", http://dating.about.com/od/onlinedating ... Online.htm , and "How To Succeed in Finding Love", http://onlinedatingexperts.co.uk/ ). Of course, such advice is targeted at the general population, so some of it may not work for autistics. In general, the best advice I can offer is to try several websites, but no more than two or three at a time, and only for a few months at a time. Finally, take frequent breaks from the whole process. A series of bad experiences can really wear you down. If you become depressed and desperate, this will repel people.

Go for it, have fun, but please remember to have some realistic expectations.

1) Be honest when filling out your profile, especially the section on body type.

2) Don't reveal everything about yourself in the first message, take things slow.

3) If you see the phrase "God fearing" or, even worse, "god fearing" then walk away. If they suddenly change location to West Africa or Russia then run.

4) Never EVER send money.

5) If you fail then do a wee bit of self analysis, alter your approach then try again. Rinse and repeat.

6) Did I mention never EVER send them any money?

Eccles

Another article with some advice:
"Dating in a Digital World", Scientific American Mind, 23, 26 - 33 (2012)
http://www.nature.com/scientificamerica ... 12-26.html
(To obtain a .pdf copy, try searching the web using http://scholar.google.com )

Two critiques of online dating:
"What are the Actual Chances of Finding a Relationship Online?"
http://plumeblue.com/pages/what-are-the ... ip-online/
"Why You Should Never Pay For Online Dating"
http://web.archive.org/web/201101091446 ... ne-dating/

Love It's only a sexual attraction between two people who rush into getting married so that Christians don't judge them and it always ends up in pain and disappointment

These fools also have children and abort them if their genes aren't perfect with the new prenatal testing technology. If they survive that, then they are pressured into fulfilling the things the parent's failed at, just so that the parents could use them as trophies and pawn them off to the greedy fat pigs of the Disney and Nickelodeon corporations if they have the face for fame.

True love is for the lonely and the hopeless who, like me, will die a lonely death ...

Nah!

As posted elsewhere, love is what happens between two people and it always ends as either:

a) A massive argument

b) A series of happy squelching noises

My view exactly.

Don't worry guys I haven't put up any profiles yet (although I won't be using Aspie Affection now, I only mentioned it as I had a profile there a few years ago) as I'm still thinking about it...