Are they messing with me?

Post Reply New Topic

Hey all, new to the planet, or perhaps I should say I just became aware of this fact. I am not 100% sure I have Aspergers Syndrome, but it does answer some questions. Anyway, I have never really been good at the social thing and even worse when it comes to matters of the opposite sex, as a result I have been pretty unlucky in the love department.

I usually get no farther then looking at someone from across the room, I usually don't know what to do or say or what not. Every so often due to work, I sometimes am forced to be around someone I like. I guess this kind of takes the pressure off of trying to approach and I can at least get comfortable around her, which often takes some time.

I am basically clueless about things, but I do pick up on some stuff (usually later)

Sometimes I will catch a smile from someone and it will register a moment later, most of the time I don't smile back, my eyes hit the floor. I have caught a few other "Signals" I guess they could be called but after past failures I am not even sure if I am just being messed with or what.

From one girl (girl A), I have received high fives, fist bumps and her putting her hand on my shoulder blade. She has smiled, giggled and laughed at mostly everything I have said. Even when I have teased her. Sang (often my name) when I was in proximity. Been really close to me, personal to intimate zone, we where standing nearly touching shoulders. Taken what I would call "unnecessary" routes putting her closer to me on her way to do something. She has given me some big smiles (which I returned to her by looking at the floor).

Her friend (girl B) has been kind of acting "strange" around me too. Usually giving me a hi when she sees me. She usually will not seek me out, but will come over and talk to her friend. There has been some banter between the three of us. I have caught eyes with girl B and she played around with her hair some. Not sure if it means anything though.

I suspected that there may be some chatter between the two of them about me. At first this was just a thought, but now, I am not sure.

I was doing a task with girl A pretty much next to me when girl B came up, slapped her butt playfully. Whispered to each other while they giggled and kind of cuddled each other. Then playfully told me to look away and to each other to not let me see what was going on. It seemed odd (to me) and left me really confused and I have to admit, my first thought is,

They are just teasing me. Just messing around.

It was playful, I kind of tried to play the part, but I was totally clueless what this meant or what was going on, likely two girls having fun at my expense. I mean, it would not be the first time something like this happened. Sadly.

Any thoughts?
Should I just keep acting toward them they way I have been?

Sounds like girl A is flirting with you and girl B is just being friendly.

As for the interaction between them it is my understanding that NT girls do cuddle and hug on their best female friends.

Now two questions would you be interested in pursuing a romantic relationship with girl A, and if so what are your workplace policies about coworkers dating? If so and it's OK try asking her to coffee and see what happens. If not simply ignore this behavior.


Sorry to break it up into two posts. Had to pause to think about it. I never figure these things out in real time.

Figured I would give an update to the situation.
People decided to try and be funny today and put me on the spot. I played it off but figured the heck with it. I suspected girl A was kind of aware of the fact I liked her anyway due to recent interactions and what she had said and then tonight I have to almost think that she had been waiting for me to make a move.

So, as sure footed as a mountain goat that just slipped on some ice on the side of a mountain and now tumbling, I can't even look at her, or maybe I did, I can't remember. I am frigging pathetic, but I am casually chatting with her, (she seemingly carrying the conversation better, almost telling me to just freaking do it), I did it. I expected to be told basically "thanks but no thanks" but that never came. I was asked where.

I am totally caught off guard. It was almost like she was waiting.

What could I say? Something stupid of course! The script changed and I was not told! All I could get out was not sure, that depends.

I was a total wreck.

After a bit more chatter, we go back to work and as I was headed out the door, I was actually wondering if I just zoned out and my mind painted me a lovely picture. She asked if I had her number, I didn't and she wrote it down that was that.

Now, what does all this mean? Not sure. This was unexpected.

I dunno, you tell us if their messing with you or not ...