What is it about guys who bully weaker guys?
odd2k wrote:
Bullying other people is often interpreted as confidence, and girls are REALLY attracted to confidence. But a person who is truly confident will not have the capacity to bully other people. A person who is completely happy with himself has no need to bully others.
There's a big difference between anger/intimidation and confidence. For some reason, most people never realize this. When some "jock" grabs the neck of a scrawny kid and shoves him into a wall, he's not feeling confident. He's really f***ing scared, and he's doing everything in his power to show himself that he's a confident person. Sadly, he will often be able to fool both himself and the rest of the world into thinking he is confident. He's not.
There's a big difference between anger/intimidation and confidence. For some reason, most people never realize this. When some "jock" grabs the neck of a scrawny kid and shoves him into a wall, he's not feeling confident. He's really f***ing scared, and he's doing everything in his power to show himself that he's a confident person. Sadly, he will often be able to fool both himself and the rest of the world into thinking he is confident. He's not.
I agree here. I think, unfortunately, it takes a maturity to see confidence. I think confidence is generally attractive, but it's one of those things that one has to have some life experience to properly see and appreciate.
Bullying is closer to bravado and machismo, which are performed substitutes for confidence - they are attempts to get other people to believe one is confident precisely because one is actually not.
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Of course, it's probably quite a bit more complicated than that.
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The_Face_of_Boo
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leafplant wrote:
Kyuubi wrote:
Do girls care about how their bfs treat other guys. I mean the girls at my school really seem to have this "as long as he's nice to me he can do whatever he wants" mentality. Based on the amount of toleration i would actually come to the conclusion that they enjoy it when their bf is mean to people. I think it may have something to do with that base desire for a dominant male. So my question is, do girls like it when their bf's bully other guys around?
Before you can even begin to understand this, you need to understand social order and hierarchies, and if you are posting on this forum, the odds are, you are incapable of understanding this about people.
NTs put up with abuse because they don't see it as abuse - to them, it's what you have to do in order to fit in and fitting in is the absolute necessity for life. They need to fit in more than they need the air to breathe. That's the basis of social order and how societies function without descending into chaos and anarchy. And this is why jocks always get the hottest girls even though most of the time they are not at all nice people.
This is true. Well written.
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