Do you get angry when aspies of your desired sex date NTs?

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Be honest.

Nope because at times I end up dating NTs myself at times only to drive em crazy later!

No.

But I would find it hypocritical if AS is a deal-breaker for them.

Agreed. After all, the pool of AS people is pretty small, and there's supposedly quite a gender disparity to boot.

I wouldn't resent it. Before finding out I'm autistic, I had a lot of girlfriends, all of which, except for one possibility, were NT. My last girlfriend, which was a little over two years ago got angry with me and accused me of having Asperger's Syndrome, which is what sent me to the Internet and eventually an online self-exam. She was not super bright, nor creative, and she was very non-verbal and indirect in most of her communications. I'm not dating right now, but in the future I'd consider anyone woman who was fun and interesting.

I have noticed a lot of autistic women have acute sensitivities to sound, touch, and other stimulations. Many, that I have met in person, like to spend most of their time alone pursuing some solitary interest. From what I can tell, based on women I've met from autism groups and projects, way over half of autistic women have no practicle place for a partner. I like cuddling, so I regularly wrestle a girlfriend down and hold her captive on the couch. I am very high-functioning and my lifestyle is closer to NT than many others. If an NT woman is a good verbal communicator, is reasonably smart, and has a sense of humor coupled with a good default attitude toward men, she is usually comfortable and happy with me.

All of that said, I can see how the people with hypersensitivities would feel the pool of compatible partners was lessened by another hypersensitive person dating an NT. And, thus, have a bit of resentment.

No.
The only time I get upset over people's dating choices is when someone I like is dating someone else, then I'm all:




but it's just disappointment; I respect their choice to date whomever they wish to.

No, not at all. Do you, hale_bopp? If so, why?

I have never had an allistic girlfriend ever. But either only found one aspie I loved and she is no longer alive having died of pneumonia in February 2011., So in some way for me this may not really be applicable because there is no one that is comaptible with me and allistics have always rejected me and are not genuine to me anyway only interested in a person for their money etc unless a person is another allistic. Other types of neurotypical there are Nuremberg Type rules anyway that allistic people use. I do feel that any aspie who dates an allistic is rather like a race traitor but I do not say anything because it propbably is illogical to think that sine there are only about. There has only been one Asperger syndrome woman I have truly desired and now she is not around any more.

I find allistics very synthetic (trying to create an external beauty to compensate for the inner ugliness) and obsessed about gender anyway.

No, I don't think I would, can't really think why. Why do you ask?

No, not at all. It's all about attraction and compatibility, and if that's who they're attracted to, so be it.

OTOH, if I was dating a guy with AS and he dumped me for an NT, I'd be pissed. Of course, I'd be pissed if he dumped me for anyone else, AS or NT, female or male!

Welcome to my world. Even worse is when they're dating guys who are already married, or only dating guys because they're foreign and, thus, a one-way ticket to his home country.

But whether the other guy is on the spectrum or not is irrelevant.

When I was single, I'd have preferred people I liked to date me.

I'm not a fan of "stick to your own kind" dating, and wouldn't promote that. I can understand that some might see it as there being less options for them when people with AS date NTs instead of others with AS, but I don't like the implicit suggestions that has. That we're so fundamentally separate that they're depleting "our" dating pool.

Is it really that different than saying whites shouldn't date blacks or an atheist shouldn't date a Christian? That if an American meets a woman in Europe or South America and they fall in love, he should leave her for her own kind's men?

Of course many will want the least problematic and most accepting partner possible, but AS-AS is no guarantee of either interest or compatibility. People who stick out will always get the short end of the stick, but we do ourselves no favors by refusing to mingle with others on principle.

The concern with "our kind" and "not our kind" is something I've tried all my life to escape, and will almost certainly die still trying to escape.

No... it almost seems an inevitable consequence of people trying to get what they don't have.

Not really I will date either NT or AS, I base it off of the person and their personality not their AS i would only ever get angry if I liked this person with AS and their NT partner was not very good to them.

No but I get dissapointed although I shouldn't, I know girls in my group that I don't (yet) have much feelings for but I would still get sad if they dated NT's but if they dated other aspies (especially those I know) I would just be down, in the end I've only had non-autistic girlfriends and I'm happy with them but being with an aspie girl would be the best.

No not really to be honest as long as the NT person was understanding of the symptoms. Personally, I've never met anyone else who has ASD in real life (though I have my suspicions about one), so I wouldn't have had the opportunity to date anyone but an NT (like my fiancee) and as they say, "You don't choose who you love".