That dark mysterious loner...

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birdsandbugs
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06 Aug 2014, 5:46 pm

I have often heard from books, TV, movies, etc that some women are attracted to the "dark mysterious loner" type. Is there any truth to that at all? Are women really curious about that or are they just creeped out IRL? I ask because I seem to fit this bill as I rarely talk to anyone unless spoken to first and am just an odd duck in general. I would love for some woman to come up to me (if I'm just staring off into the distance or looking at birds or something) and tell me that I'm interesting and not like any other guys she's seen.



Saul3903
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06 Aug 2014, 9:20 pm

I would say, if you're 35 like your profile says, and this hasn't happened to you yet, it probably won't.


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07 Aug 2014, 12:07 am

It probably only happens to guys who are exceptionally good looking.



khaoz
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07 Aug 2014, 3:39 am

Yuzu wrote:
It probably only happens to guys who are exceptionally good looking.



Correct. Dark mysterious loners who do not look like models or movie stars are viewed as gloomy, creepy and dangerous. Appearance transforms the vocabulary. Same personality characteristics, different social perceptions.



syzygyish
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07 Aug 2014, 5:37 am

birdsandbugs wrote:
I have often heard from books, TV, movies, etc that some women are attracted to the "dark mysterious loner" type. Is there any truth to that at all?


No

It's fiction


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The_Face_of_Boo
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07 Aug 2014, 5:43 am

^ The fandom over the Twilight shows it's not really a fiction.

But it only works if the guy is exceptionally handsome, like yuzu said.



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07 Aug 2014, 5:45 am

I don't care how hot a guy is, dark and mysterious nearly always equals trouble. If not because he has issues with the supernatural, then because he nearly always has a superiority complex and is so secretive you can't trust him.

Just speaking generally of course, but dark and brooding=no go for me.


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syzygyish
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07 Aug 2014, 6:00 am

The_Face_of_Boo wrote:
^ The fandom over the Twilight shows it's not really a fiction.

But it only works if the guy is exceptionally handsome, like yuzu said.


The fandom of the Twilight shows shows that the beautiful people are really a fiction created by TV shows!


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the window into which you should look?


birdsandbugs
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07 Aug 2014, 7:08 am

I thought so.



ClockWorkWonderer
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12 Aug 2014, 7:01 pm

I like dark mysterious loner types. I think it's interesting and shows that they are not interested in following the crowd and being your stereotypical "lad". It also makes them seem more intelligent and maybe they like things away from the mainstream, but that's just what I think. I myself am a bit of a mysterious loner and an introvert I suppose, so I would like a person who is like that too. Don't overgeneralise what women like, there's got to be someone who would like a person like you. Even if youre not stereotypically "handsome". I'm for example, one girl who doesn't like the kind of guy many women like. It gets boring I guess :)



Eureka13
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12 Aug 2014, 7:40 pm

I don't know about dark and mysterious, but I've always preferred men who are introverted like myself. I've never gone for the "life of the party" type, but I do appreciate anyone who can talk to ME and be interesting. And, no, I don't mean "interesting in an dark, mysterious way"!



wavecannon
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12 Aug 2014, 7:50 pm

Almost impossible to pull of without looking completely daft.

Even if Nick Cave had happened to be 5'5 with strawberry blonde, tufty hair and buck teeth he would never have recruited anyone to match his talents and he would have never left his home town.



downbutnotout
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12 Aug 2014, 9:48 pm

What is dark and mysterious, when you break it down?

I have a thing for someone who's a bit cynical and doesn't talk much because he's always willing to take me seriously and understands what it's like to be different. He's pretty much me if I was a male, more serious, and had already learned to be content living a solitary life. I don't think he's anything like Edward from Twilight, though...



elephantgirl
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13 Aug 2014, 12:12 am

yes, dark and mysterious is great!

You don't have to be good looking, just not slothful or stinky :) or creepy.

However it's unlikely I would walk up to anyone dark and mysterious to initiate conversation unless I already knew something about you that I liked (i.e. that you are a great writer, or that you made an interesting comment, or that you are carrying or wearing something that tells me you are an interesting person).

Have TOTAL confidence, be 100% yourself. If you are insecure or trying too hard to impress, you will no longer be mysterious. But you need to be able to keep her interest once she talks to you.

In my experience, conventionally good looking guys tend to act confused when women do not pay attention to them. I am always amused by this. But I find character and attitude more attractive than physical appearance, and physical attractiveness sometimes seems to prevent character and attitude from maturing...

So I tend to be more attracted to people who are low key and humble and charming, and usually those people are not conventionally good looking. Often they are dark and mysterious.



CodeGrey
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15 Aug 2014, 3:45 pm

I would say this describes my Aspie boyfriend perfectly. He is tall (6'4''), dark (hair, half Italian), and mysterious...boy was/is he ever mysterious. At first when I called him mysterious, he said he's just private. He is absolutely gorgeous. I don't doubt he had gotten a lot of attention from women over the years (he's 45). Yet, never married, no kids. Now I now why...:-/