To all the nice guys @tm...

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To all the nice guys @tm who believe certain ideas like Oliver Canby does on http://autismisbad.blogspot.com/2014/06 ... iller.html

First, having sex does not cause one to be non-autistic.

Second, let's talk about Elliot Rodger. Why did Rodger feel this extreme need to lose his virginity in the first place? I can tell you why. It is because we live in an over-sexed and hustling culture that shames a person if they don't lose their virginity by a certain age. If one does not have "game" then you are considered the problem. Do you not see something wrong with this?

Third, Our culture Canby treats everything including sex as a commodity. Sex is mechanical and is treated almost like a business transaction. Sex today is not about love and connecting souls into one heart. It is about subjectgation, dominance, defilement, debasement and control. Sex has become a form of competition in which one wins points and for what?

Fourth, Elliot Rodger wanted to play this sick and twisted player, mack-daddy game. What he wanted was to be this pimp and player in a sick and twisted hook-up game.

Fifth, my advice, quit playing this stupid game. Quit worrying about getting laid. Be the best person you can be. Try to develop a niche, go to the beach, enjoy yourself, maybe volunteer at a soup kitchen if you are able to once in a while, read, blog, have fun and enjoy life. You may or may not find someone but don't make getting laid as your primary focus. Life is to short for all of this hustling, player, mack-daddy pick-up artistry BS.

Sixth, you probably got all this BS from your peers. Well I can say, a good chunk of them are a bunch of morons who only have knowledge of the dimples on Kim Kardashian's ass cheeks. Don't listen to these morons from high school and middle school.

Couldn't have said it better myself.

Boy oh boy....where to start.?

Wanting to kill a bunch of people becuase you can't get your way is an inherently Narcissistic trait. ASD may affect you understanding of certain things (however this can be tempered by intelligence and experience) but it is a narcissism that would drive spree killing.

This is what is behind spree killing 99% of the time. You would expect co-morbid depression some of the time.

Why bring nice guy into it? Well I suppose believing you are a nice guy can be in itself "narcissistic", but not necessarily so severe.

I happen to think that the whole nice guy vs jerk argument is total bull. It is a total red herring. Most people are neither one or the other, and if they are one this is their personalty. The vast majority of claims can be explained by confidence.

You are right about meeting some societal milestone isn't going fundamental change who you are.

I which people who more intelligent, the blog is BS, but so is a lot of the other s**t.

I do think a lot of the resentment in this section is misguided.

Actually his little killing-spree sounds exactly like something a narcissistic-psychopath might do that still hasn't gotten laid yet by around that age(since they almost always do). It also goes with the "sexual-ego" trait of that disorder.

I wouldn't say it is classical psychopathy, in that case they are less likely to do a spree killing. If they murder it would be a over a longer period. The majority of spree killings end in suicide, or intention of suicide by cop. This is inconsistent, with classical psychopathy and most types of Narcissistic Personality.

It is a Narcissistic act, the more fatalistic type. However it is rarer to for a Narcissistic personality to reveal their weaknesses. I would call it Depressive Narcissism.

Another type Narcissism is Jean-Claude Romand

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jean-Claude_Romand

Yes, and wisdom as well. I think part of the problem that contributes to stuff like this is a set of dumb-headed beliefs like one can get a particular woman as a gf as though it is like playing a video game or one can earn her. From there, we have mackdaddying, game playing(one has to have game) and this pick-up artistry nonsense.

How is all of this allowed to fester? Well, adults especially parents and educators have this idea one child can be socialized by his peers. These dumb-headed ideas foster in the boys and men's locker room, in the hall ways, on the playground when you put a child who is ignorant and unwise together with a bunch of other children who are just as ignorant and unwise. What does one get when you put a whole bunch of negatives together. Definetely not positives but more negatives. If you have 25 students will each negative and negative representing lack of wisdom and social skills and multiply by -25 we have -625.

Victim complex is big part of spree killing an inability to see other especially the ones the hurt as victims

Classic case Raoul Moat
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/2010_North ... ce_manhunt

He had the narcissistic victim complex, low intelligence, and possibly abusing steroids.

The problem is these people actually convince others of their victimization before and after because the make grand statement of their grievances. Some people are convinced they are somehow a special case, when they aren't, they experince normal challages, but react badly, and this becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.

Well Eric I'm glad you posted this this and I'm in agreement with you about our hustling,competitive, oversexed culture.

Ok, for starters, you're basically rehashing PUA concepts, such as "game" etc. PUA "theory" is pretty much dead-on, hence why it's "catchy" and accessible for so many men or would-be PUAs. It's dead-on because it's principally based on psychology, stuff we've known about human nature for thousands of years.

Where PUAs fail is they do not go far enough in acknowledging that women are human beings. PUA stuff is only good for establishing a frame of mind that opens men up to establishing relationships with women. So, the positives are building confidence and starting a pattern of approaching women. All people do this at some point, and I don't care if you're a man or woman, you've DONE these things. What seems to be missing from PUA is a practice of actually valuing women as people and communicating to them how special they are. How they put these principles into practice is pretty despicable. By all means, take the good from the PUAs. Just don't actually do what they do.

Personally, I'm committed to not seeking out another intimate relationship again?EVER. If something happens to the one I'm currently in, forget it? But I'm utterly fascinated by romantic relationships and have a vested interest in keeping the fires burning in my current one (it's my last one, after all). I'm also fascinated by how people make friends and socialize, and I'm interested in forming relationships that will help me ensure the ongoing success and well-being of my family. So, yeah, I've been doing some reading, and personally I'd rather steer folks more in the direction of Dale Carnegie (my current obsession). I also found The Law of Success by Napoleon Hill. And while neither Carnegie nor Hill ever intended to make religious statements or commentary, they both invoked the Golden Rule. I've only just skimmed the first few pages of Hill's book. But I really liked what I saw with Carnegie. He starts with human nature bending to selfish ends and shows how successful people's self interest lies in the happiness and well-being of others. In other words, what makes you happy is seeing other people happy, so you put all your passion into just that. People make a lot of money and have a lot of friends because every business decision and every conversation they have is directed towards this one purpose. It is the fulfillment of the Golden Rule.

Nice Guys? do NOT value the pleasure of others. They want to be pleasured. They are nice to people not because they want others to be happy, but because they want something. People who really are nice people derive their pleasure purely from making other people happy. They count successes by eliciting smiles from others, not in money or sex. For them, money is merely a tool to continue investing in the happiness of others. A Nice Guy? places others in debt for gracious acts, which is absurd, and then proceed to whine about how they can't get what they want out of people.

Of course you can get what you want out of people. It's not that hard. The EASIEST way to get what you want from people is to actually desire those things people are actually willing to give. I want people to smile at me. I want people to say "good morning." How do I get that? Well, I smile at them and they smile back. I say "good morning" and they say good morning. I mean, come on, dude, this stuff is FREE.

What I've seen from Nice Guys?, it's all about sex. Getting sex from someone isn't hard. It's easy. The way you get it is by getting someone else to want it. To make someone want sex, you have to be the kind of person someone would want to have sex with. You have to have a relationship with that person to establish the kind of bonds a person wants before being intimate. To have that relationship, you have to be friends. The problem is that Nice Guys? don't want to be friends. They'd rather whine about being perpetually friendzoned rather than actually take an active interest in the desires of other people. Taking that level of interest in a person requires understanding and putting the Golden Rule into practice, and here is where Nice Guys? fail. They don't actually believe in it, nor are they interested in actually following it. There is no success without it. Getting sex isn't the hard part. The hard part is adopting an attitude that others matter more than yourself.

Get that straight and there's no door that won't open for you.

That's cause most stereotypical psychopaths/sociopaths have usually already gotten-laid long before then. And that's an example of what can happen if they don't. So obviously it's "inconsistent". lol

PUA is based on pop psychology, the degree to which is it science varies.

PUA is meme, the type of people they are interested in attracting, are in certain personalities, and subcultures.

Quite frankly an area where PUAs really should get over themselves are issues as serious as this. PUA are not going to save a kid like this. The guy had serious issues, he may responded possible to some attention for a while but really he need more help socially beyond just picking up girls.

You don't run before you can walk.

I take it you are joking.

But in any case, probably as psychopaths tent to be good at manipulating people. They understand people quite well. They can be charming, or enigmatic. Ted Bundy for example.

No I wasn't joking. The guy was probably a non-sterotypical sociopath/psychopath which is why crimes of that type are so rare in the first place. Guys with that disorder are usually good at being "womanizers", and that's an example of what can happen if one isn't good at it.

Ummm, you're completely overlooking the fact that sex is also about pleasure & quite often that's the reason it's done.. whether for one's own pleasure, their partner's, or both. People do, in fact, have sex for pleasure and not for any of the reasons you've listed above including "scoring points." What's wrong with people having consensual sex for pleasure if that's what they're into?

Wow, I've never seen a thread so closely resembling a pitcher plant in my life. I like to try and show kindness to everyone I meet, regardless of what it does for me socially; that's just what's called for in such a convoluted, violent and divisive world. People have begun to see olive branches as bayonets. Only a few of us have seen enough death or suffering to set priorities differently. Sometimes being nice is just being nice and we shouldn't dissect rationale.

He wasn't a psychopath at all.

You are using the generic term "psychopath", but that is general term which lumps all personality disorders and metal illness together

There is nothing in this case that indicate psychopath or ASPD.

If you have some life history which backs up you claim, sure but I doubt it.