Who is the woman of my dreams, and where is she?

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I know I've posted some of this material in the following post (so sorry in advance for repeating myself in some aspects there) in the past, but please, as a disclaimer, refrain from posting anything snide or mean-spirited. So with that said....
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I'm EquestriatoLA, or Johnny. I am almost 28, and have thought about getting a job as a computer programmer, partly because my dad is prodding me to do it. I live on a fixed income (that is as far as I will go with this, going further would be too personal for me), and as a result, I live at home (but then again, more people my age are in the same boat as I am, so I guess I don't feel as lonely on that front).

I've thought about moving to Los Angeles, but after hearing about their water problems (the state of California's, not just LA's) and the fact that there may be a major earthquake in the area within 30 years, those are, well, making me reconsider my move. But I will still try and visit there when I can. (You can read my concerns here: viewtopic.php?t=278425)

Yes, I may be upbeat most of the time, but sometimes I get down on myself, because I get compared to a lot of bad people (Casey Anthony and Jerry Sandusky come to mind) because of my social awkwardness stemming from my Aspie's (not trying to use it as a crutch, but it's just how I see things, really, before you pass judgment).

My family (and many of my friends close to me) think I am a treasure trove; I also sometimes look down on myself because I think I am cursed as a person because my birthday is on 4/13 (to fill you in on that, 4 is considered unlucky in Asian cultures, likewise with 13 in Western cultures).

But what are my good qualities? Let's see.....
I have four. Here are those four things you need to know about my good qualities:
1) My intelligence. Yeah, I know certain things, that’s what makes me so great as an Aspie. I mean, I have expertise in certain areas (sports, anime/manga, a lot of things) while I have photographic memory in some fields, as I said, there are others that I cannot do to well in. So, I’m pretty good on that front.

2) My humor. Obviously. I have many inspirations on this front, and some of my jokes are clean, others may be a bit crass, but your mileage may vary on the latter.

3) My gregariousness. Someone told me I can perform in front of an audience, and if you have seen me do so, I certainly can bring the house down.

4) I am kind-hearted. I am not as annoying/eccentric as you think, it’s just a part of who I am, really. Despite some of my problems, in the end, I am just an all-around nice guy who wants to fit in to a degree. Because of all this, I was very much loved by my high school graduating class.

While this isn't quite a dating site, I just want to ask you all: What would the woman of my dreams be like if I found her, and where would she be? I'd like you to be as creative and as nice to me about this, because I am just a hopeless dreamer. Cheers, and here's hoping the woman of my dreams comes to me soon.

I met the Woman of my dreams in my dreams funnily enough, never met her in real life though.

Even if you were to find the "woman of your dreams" irl, theres no guarantee she would like you back and if you're shy you would just watch her slip away since chances are she won't be making the first move. Obsessing over a girl who barely knows you exist.

And even if the stars were to perfectly align and you actually find the woman of your dreams and you got her to be your girlfriend, actually I can't help you with that part.

I'm not waiting for the woman of my dreams. That means i'd have to wait a pretty long time for 1 girl who probably wouldn't like me back anyways.

So I guess I'll find out when the time comes, eh? I'm cool with it.

Yep....pretty much

I met a girl when I was 11, 12 years old and I instantly fell in love with her. Unfortunately she and her parents left the city and went to live elsewhere. But even after many years I still feel the same way about her and couldn't able to forget her. Tried to find her but didn't succeed. I still couldn't move on and have any constant relationship with any other girl. Though I'm trying very hard these days. I don't know what is wrong wit me

I met an amazing woman when I least expected it and I also passed her over at first due to her being much older and ignored her eHarmony message at first. I'm very glad I gave her a chance! She confessed that she hasn't been with a guy in 12 years and only had one prior partner. The only reason I would have suspected that was how *ahem* hard it was to fit at first. I would have never met her in real life because I would have just assumed she was a)married and b)much younger than me and she isn't an athlete like me.

My guess is that my woman is in LA..... like I've said before.

Eh, you know, I will find out soon enough. I am waiting for the day the woman of my dreams comes my way.

I heard Taylor Swift is available. She likes intelligent, kind-hearted, humorous, and gregarious guys. Go get her.

^ Eh, I wish. I actually have someone else in mind.

^ Stop? Well, okay.......